Participants: Jacques LaGuerre (Host), Brittany-Hill Morales, Myesha Lawson, Timothy lawson, Xavier Morales
Series Code: PC
Program Code: PC000093A
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00:02 The following program discusses sensitive issues.
00:04 Parents are cautioned that some material 00:06 may be too candid for younger children. 00:43 Hello and thank you for joining us today 00:45 for another episode of Pure Choices. 00:48 I'll be your host Jacques LaGuerre, 00:50 and I'm joined here with my panel, 00:52 Xavier Morales, 00:54 Brittany Morales, Mayesha Lawson, 00:58 and Timothy Lawson. 01:00 Today, we will be talking about strip clubs. 01:04 Before we start, 01:06 I'll ask that you bow your heads with me as I pray. 01:10 Dear Heavenly Father, 01:11 as we talk about this sensitive issue, 01:14 I ask that You send your spirit into this place, 01:17 and You guide our discussion, in Jesus' name I pray, Amen. 01:22 Amen. Amen. 01:24 I want to start with a Bible verse, 01:26 Matthew 5:27, 28. 01:31 The Bible says, 01:32 "Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, 01:35 thou shalt not commit adultery. 01:37 But I say unto you, 01:38 that whosoever looketh on a woman to lust 01:40 after her hath committed adultery with her 01:43 already in his heart." 01:46 Now I want to ask, 01:48 what do guys think about this verse? 01:49 Do you truly believe 01:52 that looking is the same as committing adultery? 01:56 And why? 01:59 Well, one reason I believe is 02:01 'cause that's what the Bible says. 02:03 Good answer. Right. 02:05 But also another reason, 02:09 you know, I don't think anything ever stops 02:12 with just a look. 02:13 I think a look to lust can be harmful. 02:17 You can start fantasy building in your mind, 02:21 create a whole another reality in your mind, 02:23 and also it's going to lead to something as far as 02:28 if you're watching strip clubs and pornography, 02:31 if maybe you actually don't go out 02:33 and have sex with another person, 02:35 then, you know, you might do it to yourself 02:37 as in masturbation, 02:38 so it's going to lead to some kind of act. 02:40 So what you're saying is looking is never enough? 02:42 No, I don't think so, no. 02:44 Anyone else have any thoughts, is looking ever really enough? 02:47 I think it's also like 02:49 piggybacking of what Tim said 02:51 that most of the times, if you see adultery cases, 02:54 they start it with looking, 02:56 you know, looking at pornography 02:58 or looking at somebody of the opposite sex, 03:01 you know, it always starts with just looking, 03:02 but looking is usually, you know, if you indulge in it, 03:06 it really isn't that enough, yeah, 03:07 you know, you keep going to the next extreme. 03:11 When I think about adultery, 03:13 so often we think adultery as only 03:15 if a person has sexual intercourse 03:18 with another person who isn't their spouse. 03:20 When in reality, adultery is more than that. 03:24 If I'm looking at someone with lust in my heart 03:26 and I'm desiring them, 03:28 I'm already taking a special part of my heart 03:31 that belongs to my husband 03:33 and giving it to someone who doesn't deserve it. 03:35 I'm already desiring someone who I shouldn't be desiring 03:38 because they're not my husband. 03:41 So that's already the beginning of... 03:43 That's adultery 03:45 because that special sexual desire belongs to the person 03:49 that God has given to me, 03:51 not to some random guy 03:53 who's just walking across in my view. 03:56 So based on what you just talked about, 03:59 do you believe it is okay for a young Christian 04:03 to go to a strip club? 04:04 No. No. 04:06 No. Not if it's really a Christian. 04:09 Not if it's really a Christian. 04:11 He shouldn't be in that area, that atmosphere, 04:16 especially if he is a Christian. 04:18 He's supposed to want to be, you know, close to the Lord. 04:22 And in that atmosphere, 04:24 you know, it's the enemy's atmosphere. 04:26 He has his people there, he has his spirits there, 04:29 and he's walking into... 04:31 I like the term I've heard and read in some books, 04:34 the devil's enchanted ground, you know. 04:37 And so he's not safe to venture in there by himself. 04:42 And so he shouldn't be there. 04:44 Speaking of the devil's enchanted ground, 04:47 could you tell me some of the history 04:49 of the strip club? 04:50 Where did it come from? What are the roots? 04:51 And how did this institution just spring up 04:54 and almost take the country by storm? 04:57 Well, it's very interesting, 04:58 you know, when you research things 05:00 far back enough, you always go to ancient cultures. 05:03 And most of the things that they did, 05:05 they did for worship purposes. 05:08 They did it as a formal worship to their gods. 05:10 And so some of the earliest records 05:12 they have are in Egypt 05:15 and India with the belly dancing. 05:18 And there's also interesting story 05:21 about the myth 05:23 about the Babylonian God, Ishtar, 05:26 that she fell in love with Tammuz. 05:28 And he got sent to the underworld, 05:30 and she wanted to get him out. 05:31 Well, to get him out, 05:33 she had to walk through these seven gates. 05:35 And through walking to these seven gates 05:37 before she can get to the entrance of each gate, 05:39 she had to take off something. 05:41 And so, by the time, she got to the seventh gate, 05:43 she was bare obviously. 05:45 And some people think that had a lot of influence 05:47 and so then it went from those cultures 05:50 in those societies to the Greek 05:51 and Roman cultures and societies 05:53 in their worship services, 05:55 I think there was a service 05:57 that Romans had called Lupercalia, 06:01 which they used to celebrate in February 06:06 which also where Valentine's Day comes from. 06:09 And it was a fertility ritual 06:13 where the women had to dance and also there were priests 06:18 and there were different ceremonies. 06:20 And then, you know, it drifted off 06:21 from that form of culture 06:23 to kind of our times through the lake opera shows 06:28 and American burlesque. 06:30 And then what you have 06:31 for modern times in the '50s and '60s, 06:33 that's when you had the modern topless bars 06:36 kind of come out. 06:37 And so it just kind of progressed 06:38 through history, and the devil, 06:40 you know, first, he had it in the worship services, 06:42 it's in Asian culture, 06:44 and then he had it kind of "high society", 06:46 you know, kind of the operas and burlesque, 06:48 people would dress up and go and watch these shows. 06:51 And then in '50s and '60s, 06:52 it kind of branched out into the topless bars 06:55 and anything goes places like that. 06:59 Wow. 07:01 Thank you, Tim, for that history 07:02 of where strip clubs from. 07:03 I didn't know all that. 07:05 And you'd also see the history of provocative dancing 07:08 in the Bible. 07:10 You know, the story of John the Baptist. 07:13 He was put in prison by King Herod, now Herodias, 07:17 she had a problem with John the Baptist 07:19 because he spoke out against her marriage, 07:22 and she wanted to end the life of John the Baptist, 07:24 but King Herod respected John as a prophet. 07:27 And it was one fateful night, 07:29 I'm pretty sure you guys know the story, 07:32 where John the Baptist lost his life 07:35 after Herodias's daughter, 07:37 she danced for them in a very sexual way, 07:40 and she asked for John the Baptist's head 07:43 as a result of her dance, 07:44 and King Herod had made a promise to her 07:46 that he would give her anything, 07:48 up to half the kingdom. 07:50 And so you can see 07:51 that the devil has plans for women. 07:53 He wants women to use 07:54 their bodies to destroy great men. 07:59 And we can also see that in other places 08:01 in the Bible. 08:02 I know, Xavier, you had a thought about that. 08:04 Yeah, the Book of Numbers, it talks about that, 08:06 you know, often we overlook that book in the Bible. 08:09 The Book of Numbers, 08:10 it's actually a very interesting 08:12 story of Phinehas, 08:13 and I can't remember 08:15 the names of the two people involved, 08:16 maybe, Tim, you might remember the names. 08:18 The guy's name was Zimri and the girl's name was Cozbi. 08:22 Yeah, and they were... 08:23 That was at the time that Israel had still had 08:25 the temple that they would carry all around. 08:29 And they actually... 08:31 Those two people were engaged 08:32 in sex right outside of the temple. 08:34 Right out they're like, 08:35 you know, desecrating everything. 08:37 And Phinehas came and pretty much slew them 08:40 at the same time with a spear. 08:44 But it was in his... 08:46 In a way that, you know, he did it to glorify God now, 08:49 obviously, I don't recommend that to glorify God, 08:51 you go and spear somebody, we call that murder nowadays. 08:55 But you're saying that's one description 08:57 of how even before Christ's death 09:01 on the cross, someway, 09:02 somehow Satan has found a way to use, 09:06 you know, the body, sexuality, you know, stripping, 09:08 all of that to perverse the temple. 09:13 I know that in my experience, 09:14 being in the military for over three years, 09:17 that the strip club, 09:18 it's a very common place for people 09:21 to go on the weekends. 09:22 So how could someone, maybe one of the viewers 09:25 watching this television program right now, 09:28 how could they politely decline an offer 09:30 to go to the strip club, 09:31 like let's say someone from their work, 09:33 it's a tradition, everyone's going, 09:35 maybe they're just going for the buffet, 09:37 how can someone decline politely an offer 09:40 to go to a strip club? 09:41 Simply saying I don't want to go. 09:44 If the person is persistent, they keep on saying, 09:46 "Well, you should go because of X, Y, and Z." 09:48 You can probably say, 09:50 "Well, because of my beliefs and because of how 09:51 I respect myself, and I respect... 09:54 In my case, how I respect men and their bodies, 09:58 I do not want to be a part of this." 10:02 Simply stating that you are a Christian 10:07 is the way to go as well. 10:09 You know, you can, 10:11 you know, you can speak boldly about your faith. 10:14 You know, you speak politely, of course, not, 10:18 you know, not just say, 10:20 "Oh, no, I don't go there because I'm a Christian." 10:22 You know, and they look at you like you're crazy. 10:25 But you can speak boldly 10:27 about not going to certain places 10:29 due to your faith and that it's not right. 10:31 And next thing you know, 10:33 it can open up a door for witnessing. 10:36 That you can just, you know, say, 10:38 "No, thank you, you know, I'm not going go." 10:41 And then if, like Brittany said, 10:43 they persist, then I think that's, 10:45 you know, the Lord telling you to explain why you don't go 10:49 and so, but you don't have to explain why off the bat, 10:52 if that's not what you're going do, 10:54 you can just politely say, "You know, no, thank you. 10:57 I don't go to certain places." 11:01 In my own personal experience with declining offers to go 11:04 to strip clubs after I gave my life to Christ, 11:08 a lot of my friends, 11:09 they would go to the strip club, 11:11 and they had a tradition in the unit that I was at. 11:15 You know, you take all the new guys, 11:17 and you take them to the strip club, 11:19 and you make them leave their wallets at home. 11:21 And so all the people in your squad, 11:24 they'll take care of you for the night. 11:26 They'll buy you a drink, they'll buy you dances, 11:28 they'll pay for everything. 11:30 And when someone approached me 11:31 as the new guy at the unit asking me to go, 11:34 like you guys all said, I just had to politely decline. 11:37 And I didn't even preach a sermon, I didn't... 11:40 I didn't quote the Spirit of Prophecy, 11:41 I didn't quote any scripture, all I told them is, 11:43 "I'm not about that life," 11:45 and they got the point and eventually, 11:47 they just stopped asking. 11:49 And so it's very possible 11:51 just to take a stand for your faith 11:54 and not go to an institution like that, 11:55 I think would be a huge mistake to go to a strip club 11:59 to try to fit in because you don't know 12:00 what you're getting yourself into. 12:02 But also my next question, 12:04 well, what if you're at a bachelor party, 12:06 you had a bachelorette party, 12:07 and you're going there to support your friend, 12:09 someone you've known for a long time, 12:12 maybe it's even a church member, 12:13 you don't know, 12:14 and you are surprised by some adult entertainment 12:19 that walked to the front door, 12:21 now what would you do in that situation? 12:23 That's a surprise all right. 12:26 That's a setup from the devil. 12:31 It's a tricky situation. 12:34 How I would probably approach the situation 12:36 would be probably based on how close I am 12:39 to that individual 12:41 because as we've kind of been stating before, 12:44 stripping does have a negative effect on you. 12:48 And I heard so many different stories 12:50 of how the strippers just appear out of nowhere, 12:53 nobody has a clue, 12:55 and I think if it's one of my close friends, 12:57 even if it's one of my sisters', 12:59 I probably have to turn off the music and say, 13:03 "I love you, and because I love you, 13:05 we have to ask this gentlemen to leave 13:07 because you're about to make 13:08 a very important decision tomorrow, 13:10 and this right here is the first step 13:13 into a downfall before you even say I do, 13:16 and you need to really consider this." 13:18 And that's the decision I will make 13:20 because if I truly love this person, 13:23 and I'm at there to support them, 13:25 to encourage them to make a great lifelong decision, 13:29 then they need to start making pure choices 13:31 before they even jump the broom. 13:34 And you have to be straight up, and say, "Okay." 13:38 If it's not someone I'm really, really close to, 13:41 maybe not to have to have a huge discussion, 13:44 probably pick up my bag and slowly like, 13:47 you know, sneak out depending, 13:50 maybe it was just a random invite, 13:51 and I was like, "Okay, maybe I'll go." 13:53 Well, probably, knowing me, I'll probably say something. 13:57 I think to... 13:58 It's like what Brittany said, 14:01 you know, this day and age, they don't... 14:03 The strippers don't come just to strip, 14:05 you know, they call it the last hoorah. 14:07 You know, they got to sleep, 14:08 the bride or groom gets to sleep 14:11 with the individual stripper. 14:13 You know, it's the last night, and that's just, 14:16 you're commit... 14:17 You're essentially starting an adulterous track 14:20 before you even start the marriage. 14:22 You know what I mean? So I think too... 14:25 I mean, this is a random act that happens, 14:27 but being a police chaplain, 14:30 I've been asked if I was a stripper, 14:32 you know, I went to a call, 14:34 I remember, and these ladies like 14:35 it's part of the culture though. 14:37 It's that prevalent in the culture 14:38 that if you are... 14:40 If the cops are not called you over there 14:42 because of a noise complaint, and you're just a chaplain, 14:44 you're just there to pray for somebody, 14:46 they'll put their hands on you, and say, "You a stripper?" 14:48 And I'm like, "No, ma'am" You know, and I'm thinking, 14:50 you know, I'm trying to be a Christian, 14:52 and I say, "You know, get off me." 14:53 But at the same time, it's like, 14:54 "Do I pray or do I run? You know, what do I do?" 14:57 And I think it's a very valid point 14:59 that if you get caught in that situation, 15:02 don't immediately go on impulse, 15:04 you know, like don't utterly reject your friends 15:08 or family members 15:09 or whoever they are, but at the same time, 15:11 use the sermon to lovingly, 15:13 you know, remove yourself out of that situation. 15:15 And if possible, help whoever it is 15:18 to remove themselves as well 15:19 from committing a grave mistake. 15:22 So let me add again, the common thread 15:24 is to remove yourself from the situation 15:26 Yeah, you got to get out of there. 15:28 Okay, okay. 15:29 And to transition to our next thought. 15:34 When you do your research, 15:35 and when you look at some of these strip clubs 15:38 and you look at some of the different types 15:41 of strip clubs, many of them, 15:42 they don't even show full nudity. 15:45 In some of them the top stay on, 15:46 bottom stay on, 15:47 or there are things that are called bikini bars, 15:50 and where all the women, 15:51 they stay in bikinis the whole time. 15:53 And even that is sexually charged 15:56 enough to get men to throw money, 15:59 to do all these different things. 16:00 And so if a bikini is so socially charged, 16:03 how can a Christian safely navigate 16:06 what I call a strip club by the water, 16:08 aka the beach? 16:11 Well, well, then. 16:13 How can a Christian safely navigate the beach? 16:17 In this day and age... 16:21 I'm not sure if it's safe for, 16:25 you know, a Christian to navigate the beach, 16:28 especially if you're struggling 16:30 with that kind of lust or whatever 16:32 because you just have that same element. 16:36 You know, you have people 16:38 sleeping on the beach with tops off, 16:40 and it's just fully exposed, and unless, 16:44 you know, there's a section of the beach 16:45 where it doesn't look like that 16:47 or you've found another place to go, 16:50 I don't know 16:51 if they can navigate the beach so much. 16:54 Well, for one, they need to know 16:56 what type of beach they're going to 16:58 'cause there's different types of beach. 16:59 You can go to a beach 17:01 that has that's more family-oriented 17:04 or you can go to a beach that just have a nude. 17:08 Miami. 17:09 Because there is a nude beach in Miami, okay, I know. 17:14 So you just want to know your surroundings, okay? 17:19 And you want to pick your battles. 17:21 Don't say, "Oh, well, 17:22 since we're close to this nude beach, 17:24 let me go here." 17:25 You don't play with fire 17:26 'cause you're going to get burned. 17:28 So I advise a person to go to the beach 17:32 that's more family-oriented. 17:33 Yeah. 17:34 Being an island girl, 17:36 and we have so many different beaches, 17:38 one of the things that I could kind of say is, 17:42 as she said, know which beach you're going to, 17:44 and actually if you really need to have that swim, 17:47 maybe it's for exercise or whatever purpose, 17:50 know what times to go, like early in the morning, 17:53 it's a little bit colder, 17:54 so people are mainly there to swim, 17:57 and you'll probably find more older women, 17:59 and they usually don't wear bikinis. 18:01 They usually wear regular swim suits, 18:06 and you also know which days to go 18:08 'cause on certain days, that's when they probably have 18:10 the drinking, the partying, 18:12 you have to be aware and make that wise choice of, 18:15 "Okay, I'm not going to go at this time 18:17 because I know the temptation that's there, 18:19 I know the type of people will be there, 18:22 and I want to be able to make a better choice." 18:26 That's good, that's good, that's good. 18:27 So you have to be aware of your surroundings, 18:30 you can't just go to any beach because there's beaches 18:32 that allow different levels of nudity. 18:35 Very wise, very wise. 18:37 And so when you understand 18:39 that going to these institutions, 18:41 going to strip clubs, or going to nude beaches, 18:44 it presents an environment 18:46 where you can objectify women 18:48 or you, as a woman, could be objectified. 18:50 Now the question 18:52 I have is how does it affect the person 18:55 who's doing the objectifying? 18:57 Because many times, 18:58 we talk about the affect of the actual dancer 19:01 or the actual person that you're lusting after, 19:04 but how does it affect the person 19:05 who's doing the lusting? 19:07 Or does it affect them at all? 19:09 Or are they just getting away scot-free? 19:11 Well, you know, I remember when I used to go... 19:14 When I started getting into it, 19:16 you know, where I live there's a strip 19:18 and there's like about three 19:21 or four strip clubs on the strip. 19:23 And we would just go there 19:24 every weekend and drink and stuff. 19:27 What you begin to find out 19:29 is you begin to... 19:33 It changes you in one way 19:34 'cause you begin to desire these type of women, 19:37 so you might even want to try date some, 19:39 you look at them in a certain way. 19:41 For me, I started to associate women with money, 19:45 you know, not necessarily giving her money, 19:48 but this girl uses her body to make money, 19:51 and that started to be okay in my mind that this is fine 19:56 'cause maybe, 19:57 you know, then I can use this way 19:59 to get some money too. 20:00 So I started to, 20:01 you know, I guess look at a person 20:03 almost like an object 20:04 instead of a person and become real selfish. 20:08 And so that's how it can affect the person sitting there 20:11 because they're associating 20:15 sexual stimulation, money, 20:18 being used or using somebody all in one, 20:21 and it's just all intertwined 20:22 and really confusing in your mind. 20:24 Wow, wow, wow. 20:25 Something the biggest way it can affect you to, 20:27 you know, at the end of the day, 20:29 most people want to find out right person, 20:31 want to be with the right person, 20:32 but then when that right person comes along, 20:35 you can mess it up. 20:37 You know, you can end up treating them 20:38 not the right way. 20:40 You know, those are habit-building things 20:42 that you do, you know. 20:43 Everything that you do, 20:44 everything that you put your eyes 20:46 on can potentially create habits, 20:47 and you either have a choice, 20:48 you create positive or negative habits. 20:50 And objectifying women, 20:53 I mean, I did that for a living pretty much. 20:55 And I created bad habits in me 20:57 that God and I had to work through tremendously 21:01 because, you know, when I started, 21:03 you know, being friends with my wife, 21:05 we're just friends at the time and everything, 21:08 I know what I saw in my heart, 21:10 but I know what I was supposed to see. 21:12 You know, I saw her 21:14 as another woman, another female, 21:15 another trophy. 21:16 But in my heart, 21:18 I knew God wanted me to see her 21:19 as His daughter, as His prized possession, 21:22 and that if He is going to allow me to pursue her 21:25 or be with her or accompany her anywhere, 21:27 I need to treat her in accordance to His Word. 21:31 And you create double the work for yourself essentially, 21:34 you know, and you never... 21:35 And unless you conquer that from the get-go, 21:37 unless you remove yourself from those habits, 21:40 you're going to end up alone 21:41 or, worse, with a domestic battery charge. 21:44 Wow, wow, wow. I think... 21:46 Also it makes you a little bit of a selfish hypocrite. 21:50 You don't mind going, you don't mind watching, 21:53 but you don't want your daughters to do it 21:55 or your sister to do it, and that's... 21:57 And so if you wouldn't want them to do it, 21:59 why do you want 22:01 somebody else's daughter or sister, 22:02 why is it then okay? 22:04 And so what it creates 22:05 in your mind is you can objectify, 22:08 make reasons to get where you want, 22:10 you know, so you can live out your lives there too. 22:14 I want to read a quote here from Sister White 22:16 and signed to the times, 22:17 November 26, 1896, paragraph nine. 22:21 She's speaking about Solomon and how all the objectification 22:25 and all the women he had and the affect it had on him. 22:29 She writes and I quote, 22:30 "And it came to pass when Solomon was old 22:32 that his wives turned his heart after other gods, 22:35 and his heart was not perfect with the Lord his God. 22:38 From being one of the greatest kings 22:39 that ever wielded a scepter, 22:41 whose exalted wisdom 22:42 made him renown throughout the world, 22:44 Solomon became profligate and intemperate, 22:47 the tool and slave of others, 22:49 his character once noble 22:51 and manly became enervated and effeminate." 22:55 Became enervated and effeminate. 22:58 And so even in the story of Solomon, 23:01 we can see that objectification. 23:04 And the more you do it, the more you want to do it, 23:06 and in Solomon's case, he did it a lot. 23:09 And towards the end of his life, 23:12 Sister White tells us that he became effeminate. 23:16 And, you know, that's just how sin works. 23:18 The devil offers you a check that's going to bounce. 23:23 It looks shiny, it's golden, it has all the trimmings, 23:26 you know, the devil tells you the more women you have, 23:28 the more of a man you are. 23:30 And we read in the case of Solomon 23:31 that the more women he had, the more of a woman he became. 23:38 And so one of our final questions for today 23:41 will be can a couple include stripping 23:44 in their lovemaking session? 23:48 No. 23:49 Wow, you answered 23:51 that rather quickly, can you explain? 23:52 Well, for one, I was a former dancer, 23:57 and now that I am a new creature in Christ, 24:01 I should not take that these that were perverted 24:04 in my past to my future 24:07 or, you know, to my marriage, my relationship, 24:11 like I wouldn't do those type of thing. 24:15 Okay, well, I have a couple of follow up questions, 24:16 and then, do you believe it is okay 24:18 for a husband to watch his wife undress? 24:20 Most definitely. Yes, why not? I think... 24:23 Yeah, I think undressing 24:25 and somebody is stripping for you 24:27 is kind of two different things. 24:28 Right. 24:30 'Cause the woman wouldn't be putting on a performance. 24:31 That's a performance, 24:32 you know, the stripping is really a performance 24:34 that they're putting on, and it creates an open door 24:37 because he's watching his wife do it, 24:40 and so what happens when he flicks on the channel 24:44 or gets invited to a club, like you said, 24:46 and he sees somebody does it better than his worth. 24:48 You know, he might go... 24:50 He might start to like that more. 24:51 When he goes home, he might tell his wife, 24:53 "You know, I've seen this, 24:54 and you should do it like this now." 24:57 I think it'll open up a door for the Satan 25:00 and the devil to creep in and do some things 25:01 that are unholy in their marriage. 25:03 Right. Because the woman... 25:05 If the husband tells his wife that, how would the wife feel? 25:09 You know, she'll be like, "I thought I was doing okay, 25:13 you know, to please my husband." 25:15 And then it will make you wonder, 25:16 "What are you doing outside of the home? 25:19 Where are you getting this from?" 25:21 You know, a woman's mind will start to wonder, 25:23 and then she would think, 25:24 "Does my husband accept me the way I am?" 25:27 So it'll bring confusion inside the marriage. 25:29 Okay, okay. 25:30 And I know you said 25:31 that you used to be a former dancer, 25:33 and so the next question I have is 25:35 and we've all made mistakes in our past, 25:38 many of them are sexual. 25:40 And so how can we be careful 25:43 not to allow our past mistakes to affect us 25:47 and what we allow and what we don't allow 25:50 in a healthy marriage relationship? 25:54 Well, for one, in my experience, 25:58 I had to be mindful of the things I do 26:01 when it comes down to my marriage, 26:03 especially taking things from the past 26:05 and bringing it in, okay? 26:08 I've made mistakes... 26:10 Better yet, I'll ask my husband, 26:13 you know, what he likes and what he doesn't like, 26:17 or we also had counseling, 26:20 and we've got things out of the Bible itself, 26:25 what's appropriate 26:26 and what's not appropriate, okay? 26:29 So and to be honest, 26:32 I want the Lord in my bedroom, okay? 26:35 I do. 26:36 I want him to bless my marriage. 26:38 I don't want the devil to have 26:40 not even a little bit of room to just creep in 26:42 and cause confusion between me and my spouse. 26:47 I think there's some things 26:48 that are definitely just okay to do 26:51 and that are differently not okay, 26:53 but even in those things 26:54 that are okay, you don't want... 26:56 Every person is different as past experiences 26:59 that you don't want to trigger or have bring up by, 27:02 you know, doing those things in your marriage as well. 27:04 So you guys have to have communication 27:06 and talk about things. 27:07 Thank you for those comments. I really appreciated that. 27:10 And I think the common thread 27:11 we can find throughout what they just said about 27:14 what should be allowed 27:15 and what should not be in the marriage bed 27:17 is keeping Christ at the center. 27:20 And Christ has the right. 27:21 He has the authority to be 27:22 the center of our relationships. 27:24 He has the right to be in our bedrooms. 27:26 As 1 Corinthians 6:20 says, 27:29 "For ye are bought with a price, 27:31 therefore, glorify God in your body 27:34 and in your spirit, which are God's." 27:38 And so God does not ask us to do these things 27:41 without the right. 27:45 That's all the time we have for today. 27:47 Thank you for joining us 27:49 for another episode of Pure Choices. 27:51 Keep Christ at the center of your life, live for Him, 27:55 and remember to make pure choices. |
Revised 2018-05-02