Series Code: LAC
Program Code: LAC180010A
00:01 The Bible says,
00:02 "The Lord will give you beauty from ashes."
00:06 We wondered about this statement.
00:08 How is God gonna turn something beautiful
00:10 when our 19-year-old daughter became pregnant?
00:13 Join us on Life After Choice
00:16 and see the amazing journey
00:17 that God took us through this difficult time.
00:36 Welcome to Life After Choice.
00:38 This is Pastor Todd Parker.
00:39 And I'm Gina Parker.
00:41 And we're dealing with a 19-year-old daughter
00:43 that's unwed and pregnant.
00:45 And what do we do with this situation?
00:48 I'd lived in Idaho for many years
00:50 and I became a pastor.
00:52 And when we found out,
00:54 and we were living in Mississippi,
00:55 that she was pregnant, it was devastating.
00:58 But in our life, we moved forward, right?
01:02 And in the fact that we moved forward,
01:04 it's been quite a journey.
01:06 But I want you to talk about the young lady
01:10 and the other lady that you met.
01:12 Well, I was at the ministerial meetings,
01:15 I believe, in Austin, Texas.
01:16 And it was just very interesting how that...
01:19 I'm the type of person, I like to look at the booths.
01:21 There were a lot of booths.
01:22 And I think there was like maybe 300 booths there.
01:25 And walking around
01:26 and going from booth to booth to booth
01:28 and I found this lady
01:29 and I saw her banner on her booth,
01:31 and it said something about abortion and stuff,
01:34 and I started talking to her.
01:36 And she just started opening up
01:38 about what this whole thing was.
01:40 And I told her about our situation,
01:41 how it just affected us deeply, and how it hurt so hard,
01:46 but, you know, God is what's good.
01:48 And so he quickly called us and he said,
01:55 "Gina, I want you to come.
01:56 I want you to meet these ladies.
01:58 And they've got a really powerful testimony."
02:01 Our daughter Jessica, she was with us.
02:04 And we were glad that we brought her
02:06 because we went and we met a young lady
02:09 by the name of Antoinette Doug and Diana.
02:13 And they were such a blessing to me and to my daughter.
02:18 And as Antoinette was talking and telling us her story,
02:24 I was sitting there thinking it's gonna be okay
02:28 because as I said before,
02:30 you know, I grew up
02:32 with having to live the dos and the don'ts
02:35 and to walk the tight line.
02:37 And here was a situation that was in my mind a don't.
02:42 I had a daughter, a single daughter,
02:46 who was pregnant,
02:47 and that's not the way life is supposed to be.
02:49 Life is supposed to be,
02:51 you get married, you have kids, you have grandkids.
02:54 That's the way life's supposed to be.
02:56 But that's not reality.
02:57 Life doesn't always turn out that way.
03:00 And that was our situation.
03:03 And as Antoinette was talking,
03:05 in my mind I was getting what I needed,
03:08 peace and joy for the first time.
03:12 And I was realizing that I was going to be a grandma
03:18 and that my daughter was going to be a Mom.
03:22 And as I was watching her talk,
03:25 my mind started wandering and I thought,
03:28 "You know what, this little baby inside
03:31 can be this young lady and can be this ministry
03:36 and can be a light for God."
03:39 And so all the negativeness,
03:40 all the what would people say,
03:42 what would people think, I finally realized.
03:45 But what is God going to say, what is God going to think,
03:48 what has God got planned for this unborn baby.
03:52 And my world changed.
03:54 And I was watching my daughter
03:56 who I know that she was going through a lot in her life.
04:00 She was struggling
04:01 with the whole idea of being a single mom,
04:04 how is she gonna do it,
04:05 again, what will people think.
04:08 But as Antoinette was talking,
04:11 I could see peace coming over her face.
04:14 And I knew right then and there she was gonna be okay,
04:17 and that she was gonna make it,
04:19 and that God was gonna take care of her,
04:23 and that God was gonna be with her.
04:27 And so I praise God for that.
04:30 And because of that, we moved forward.
04:34 You know, I think too it helped us understand...
04:37 Antoinette helped us
04:39 be able to know how to speak of the church,
04:41 how to do all those things
04:42 because it was the unknown in that situation.
04:46 We've already talked at the conference about it,
04:48 but now we're gonna be talking to the church
04:50 and everything else.
04:51 And I just think,
04:53 sorry, it was just very reassuring
04:57 and helping us to be able to know what to do.
04:59 It was. Yes.
05:01 Yeah, I took away that fear and it helped us realize
05:04 that God was in control.
05:08 And as I said before, this amazing Godly woman,
05:12 who I just adore, she was a church member,
05:16 and she noticed
05:18 that Jessica wasn't feeling well,
05:19 and she came up to me
05:20 and she asked me if she was pregnant,
05:23 and I said yes.
05:26 You know, she wrapped her arms around me
05:27 and we cried together.
05:30 And you know what, that amazing church
05:33 gave my baby girl a baby shower.
05:36 They wrapped her in love,
05:38 they let her know that it was gonna be okay,
05:42 that everything was gonna turn out okay,
05:43 that God was gonna be with us.
05:46 And we couldn't have asked
05:48 for a better outpouring of love, could we?
05:54 I mean, the church was just amazing.
05:56 Everybody was supporting,
05:58 our family was supporting and loving.
06:01 And all through the way,
06:03 we could see where God was leading us.
06:06 And because of that, what do we have right now?
06:10 We have a young boy named Logan Isaiah Parker,
06:16 and he is a...
06:18 You know, it's interesting,
06:19 you can go into a room with him and it just lights up.
06:22 I mean, he is just incredible kid
06:24 and he is our grandson.
06:26 And he is almost three years old now.
06:30 It's been a few years.
06:32 But it's just watching him
06:34 and being able to grow and everything...
06:37 'cause we FaceTime, we don't live next door
06:40 like I wish we would.
06:41 That's the hardest part for us.
06:42 We FaceTime a lot.
06:44 And I mean, last night,
06:45 it was just incredible watching him.
06:47 He's very thrilled with things.
06:48 But, you know, it's interesting,
06:50 he's swimming now.
06:51 He is jumping off the dock into the lake
06:53 with his arm things
06:55 so he can just...
06:57 But, you know, thinking about it,
06:59 abortion is an end, and this is life.
07:03 And giving him the opportunity to have life is incredible.
07:06 It really is. I agree.
07:09 And also the fact that.
07:13 You know, we worry so much about what people think,
07:16 you know, and what they will say.
07:20 And we don't worry what God thinks.
07:25 We don't worry
07:26 what is God gonna say about all this.
07:29 And I think we have a habit of living in fear,
07:36 you know, because I mean, for us, right?
07:38 I mean, the moment that we heard about it,
07:44 I had fear, I was scared.
07:48 I was scared for us,
07:52 you know, as parents.
07:55 But, you know, thinking about it,
07:57 when we move back into the story
07:58 and talk about the fact that
08:00 when your daughter first heard the ultra sound,
08:02 and you heard that ultra sound, it was incredible.
08:05 But then when you went to the...
08:07 I wasn't able to go,
08:09 but you went to go to see the baby born,
08:13 that was an incredible part.
08:14 Maybe you should talk a little bit about that.
08:15 I will.
08:17 I remember it.
08:21 Again, you know,
08:22 it's hard to break from tradition.
08:24 It's hard to break from the way you grew up.
08:28 But I remember going...
08:31 My daughter invited us to go...
08:33 invited me to go to hear the baby's heartbeat.
08:38 And I remember thinking,
08:40 "Okay, I can do this."
08:43 And they put the ultrasound on her stomach,
08:46 and I heard that heartbeat so loud, so clear.
08:51 And it finally, just really became real.
08:55 This was a baby.
08:57 I mean we aw, ooh, and aw over babies,
09:00 and this was a baby.
09:02 But this wasn't just a baby.
09:03 This was my baby, my grandson.
09:09 At the time, I thought it was gonna be a girl, so.
09:12 But this was for real.
09:16 And you know what, Antoinette had given us
09:19 this little pen
09:20 and it had these two tiny little feet.
09:23 And I've kept that pen
09:26 'cause it reminded me that
09:30 that is life.
09:32 That is life.
09:34 Those two little feet, two little hands,
09:36 a little heartbeat.
09:38 And I thought about that
09:39 when I was listening to that heartbeat.
09:42 Later on, I got to hear and see this little baby,
09:48 and I got to see, again, the toes, the fingers,
09:51 the nose, the mouth, everything.
09:54 And at that moment,
09:56 I realized that that was a part of my husband,
09:59 that was a part of me,
10:03 that was going to be a new life.
10:06 And it just changed.
10:07 I didn't care what people thought anymore.
10:10 I only cared what God thought.
10:11 And God said, "This is life.
10:14 This is a gift that I have given you.
10:19 Take this gift and make it a blessing."
10:25 I know that right now there is someone out there
10:29 who is going through what we went through.
10:34 I know there are parents out there
10:37 who just found out...
10:39 your daughter is pregnant or has just found out
10:43 that your son has gotten someone pregnant.
10:46 And all of a sudden, now fear is taking over.
10:50 And you're thinking,
10:53 "What are people gonna say about me?
10:55 How can I get rid of this?
10:56 How can I make this problem go away?"
10:59 I'm asking you to stop.
11:02 Get on your knees right now
11:06 and don't worry what people say.
11:08 People will talk. I don't care.
11:09 You could live a perfect life
11:11 and someone is still gonna find something
11:12 to talk about.
11:13 But get on your knees right now and say,
11:15 "God, what do You want me to do?
11:21 I don't know what to do."
11:23 But you know what, God does.
11:27 I'm not saying that God wanted your life
11:29 to be this way.
11:31 I'm not saying that God said,
11:32 "Okay, this is the way it's gonna be."
11:34 But God, like I said before, God can take a crooked arrow,
11:38 a situation that was not meant to be
11:41 and He can turn it into a blessing.
11:43 He can still help you hit the mark.
11:47 You right now, as a parent, have a child that needs you,
11:53 the child that's in crisis,
11:56 and the child that can only see God through you.
12:02 And you have the responsibility
12:07 to show them God.
12:11 And the way to do that
12:13 is by giving them encouragement,
12:17 giving them love, and giving them the strength
12:21 to help them get through this.
12:23 And you know what, God's gonna give you
12:25 all of that.
12:27 He's gonna give you strength,
12:28 He's gonna give you encouragement.
12:30 And along the way,
12:32 He is going to show you what you need to do.
12:37 I'd like to say one more thing and that is this.
12:41 If there's a pastor out there that's just found out,
12:43 maybe his daughter...
12:48 It's strange because of the fact
12:50 that he has just found out that she is pregnant.
12:52 I want you to get on your knees
12:54 and ask God to work in your life
12:56 because don't neglect your daughter,
13:01 don't be embarrassed of your daughter,
13:02 but know that she may have made a mistake,
13:05 but that doesn't mean you don't still love her
13:07 because she is asking,
13:09 she is crying out for love I'm sure,
13:11 and she needs you to be a support.
13:14 I know that church may say why, the conference may say why,
13:19 but your daughter has a baby,
13:21 and it needs to be first in your life
13:23 and put her first
13:25 because I think that's so important, don't you?
13:26 Oh, I totally agree.
13:28 You know, and I also think that
13:31 as a couple to support each other,
13:35 I mean, honestly and truthfully
13:36 because of the way I was raised,
13:39 you know and because you were raised so different,
13:42 you became my rock.
13:45 And I knew that
13:46 if everything was okay with you,
13:49 that everything was gonna be all right.
13:51 But God gave you the insight to know what to say.
13:56 And so I'm awfully grateful for that.
14:01 But I say, as a couple
14:03 we need to support each other in this situation.
14:06 And as a family, yes.
14:08 And as a family, we need to support each other.
14:09 They maybe in a mistake, they may be in situations,
14:11 but that doesn't mean you still don't trust
14:14 and work with God
14:16 cause God doesn't create junk, He creates life.
14:19 That's right.
14:21 And when He makes life, He makes it precious.
14:23 He says you are a jewel, you are a fine gold,
14:26 and so He is creating that in your life.
14:29 And I would also like to say that
14:32 that beautiful baby,
14:34 that tiny unborn child is not a curse.
14:37 It's a blessing. Amen.
14:39 And God's gonna turn your ashes into beauty.