Participants: Paul & Carolyn Rayne (Host), Hannah & Caleb Rayne
Series Code: HTH
Program Code: HTH00026A
00:01 In the last 25, "Happy the Home", programs
00:03 we have covered a lot of material.
00:07 And we've given you many practical challenges.
00:09 We sincerely pray that all the
00:12 programs have been a blessing to you.
00:15 Join us now for the final program
00:17 in this series entitled, "Building on Success".
00:41 Welcome to "Happy the Home".
00:43 And we are so pleased that
00:46 you are with us for this very last program.
00:49 We have covered a lot of ground.
00:51 And I think you know by now that I am Paul Rayne.
00:54 This is my dear wife, Carolyn Rayne.
00:57 And we have been your hosts here on,
00:59 "Happy the Home", for the last 25 programs.
01:02 We have covered an immense amount of material.
01:05 And if you are with us for the first program
01:08 you'll remember that we had a...
01:11 we had the family up here and we were talking about
01:14 Ernest Shackleton on his experience about
01:18 the Endurance, and actually not about the Endurance.
01:22 So, hopefully it hasn't been an Endurance
01:25 to go through these 26 programs.
01:27 We have covered a lot of ground
01:29 and I know especially in those first programs we did,
01:33 we had your parents involved in lots of
01:35 activities to win your children's hearts.
01:38 So we wanted to spend a little bit of time
01:39 reviewing some of the steps.
01:43 Because it's likely here on 3ABN
01:45 the program might well go around again.
01:47 So even though this is a last program,
01:49 we kind of launching you into another round
01:52 if it goes around another time.
01:54 So where did we start off, Carolyn?
01:56 Affection and needing to encourage affection.
02:00 It was, part of section one, where we were
02:03 seeking to encourage parents
02:05 to win the hearts of their children.
02:08 And why do we have to win the hearts of children.
02:11 Why did we spent 13 of the 26 programs
02:15 all about winning the affection of our children?
02:18 Because dear parents at home,
02:21 if we have not got the affection of our children
02:25 then it gets very laborious
02:27 to try and roll out any kind of
02:31 reforms or change anything in the family.
02:33 Because the children have got
02:34 the attitude we are not interest.
02:36 We don't really want to go with this mom and dad.
02:39 So we spend those first programs
02:42 and some of the things we covered there,
02:44 you mentioned affection.
02:45 We talked about one-on-one time.
02:48 We did that a couple of times.
02:49 And special time with our children
02:51 to bind our hearts to their hearts,
02:54 what were some of the other things?
02:55 We talked about encouragement
02:57 and how difficult it is sometimes to get
02:59 to speak those words of encouragement.
03:01 But what a big motivator it is
03:03 when we can choose to do that.
03:05 We also talked about family time,
03:07 if you remember, having a little bit of time
03:11 in your busy day that you could come to together
03:14 as a family and do something fun together or
03:17 wash the car or go for a bike ride.
03:20 Just something you could do together as a family.
03:23 What was another topic we covered
03:25 in that first section, Carolyn?
03:27 Another aspect we looked at was
03:29 checking in with our child's conscience.
03:31 Just finding out is there anything on their heart,
03:33 may be when we're tucking them into bed at night,
03:36 to find out if they are carrying a burden
03:37 that we can help them deal with.
03:40 We also encourage you to pray
03:42 with your children and for your children.
03:44 And then we moved on in the middle section
03:47 program's number 14 through to program 17.
03:50 That was looking at leading our children's
03:52 hearts to Christ where we encourage
03:54 parents to make a call to their children's hearts.
03:59 And I don't know how that went to for you parents.
04:02 But you know, so often we can leave it
04:05 to somebody else to an extend
04:07 an invitation to our children.
04:09 When it's a responsibility that we need to pick-up.
04:14 And then tell us a little about the last section, the...
04:17 Well, I was gonna add to what just you were
04:19 talking about in the middle section.
04:20 It included being a true friend to our children
04:24 making that connection on a friendship therefore
04:26 with them as we invite them to come to the Lord.
04:29 And, we also talked about discipline if you remember.
04:31 Some of those seven principles
04:33 for corrective discipline.
04:36 What did we cover on the last section, Carolyn?
04:38 The last section is entitled developing, Christian
04:40 principles at home. It was very practical.
04:42 We talked about things like, Soul Power,
04:44 where we talked about personal devotional time
04:47 prayer a Bible study and the Holy Spirit in our lives.
04:49 And we talked about family worship.
04:51 We role played that out.
04:53 And the connection that counts,
04:55 all about connecting to Christ John Chapter 15.
04:59 And then we talked about that sword fight
05:00 with the devil, with a plastic knife
05:02 and have that's our will without the Lord in it.
05:05 And then the beautiful big sword which is like
05:07 the word of God and how that is the power
05:10 against the enemy that we need in our lives.
05:12 And then the last one was organizing confusion.
05:15 You know, I hope that as you've
05:18 watched these programs you have taken up
05:21 the challenge of the step forward sections
05:25 that we have given at the end of every program.
05:27 If you have I am sure you would have felt
05:30 some of the benefits because
05:31 someone once said it's in the water
05:34 that we learn to swim not on the shore.
05:37 So you can get your instruction
05:38 from your TV here.
05:40 But the real action happens when you start
05:44 putting these things into practice.
05:45 But as I should imagine for a lot of our viewers
05:49 you have may be done a few of the challenges.
05:52 So we ready want to encourage you to
05:56 go through this again and this time
06:00 really get involved, really invest in the program
06:05 as in terms of what it can do for your family.
06:08 And that sound little twist that
06:10 we would like to add to this program.
06:12 What do we do now we are on program 26?
06:14 Where do you go from here?
06:17 Well, we want to challenge you to go through
06:20 this whole thing again with your children.
06:23 Yeah, right back to number one
06:25 and start it all over again.
06:27 And you will say, Oh! Paul no, no, no,
06:29 no, again, yes again.
06:31 Because how many times would we have to go through this.
06:34 Until we got it down perfect.
06:37 Would it be once? Would it be twice?
06:39 It probably be, be, a hundred times.
06:41 You know, if we just some person said to us.
06:43 If you just keep rolling through this,
06:45 going round and round and round.
06:46 What a base that would be for our children growing up
06:51 and the parenting principles that we brought out.
06:53 So whether that involves purchasing the DVD's
06:58 from 3ABN or you can also get them
07:00 at restoration- international.org,
07:03 or whether you wait for the program
07:06 to roll around again on 3ABN whatever it is
07:10 we really want you to treat this first time round as,
07:17 well that was a good initiation.
07:19 At least we've got the big picture now
07:21 from beginning to end.
07:23 And then go through the whole thing again.
07:24 Of course another way that you can go through
07:28 the Happy the Home program is to get the companion book
07:32 it's entitled the Connected Family.
07:36 And every program that we have presented
07:38 represent is parallel by a chapter in that book.
07:43 And so the idea of the book was that
07:45 you can go through this at your own pace.
07:49 You don't have to wait for 3ABN to air it again.
07:52 You can, in the book you get
07:54 similar content of the program,
07:57 a little bit different and then you get some
07:59 step forward challenges on the program generally
08:03 we have only been giving you warns, sometimes two.
08:06 But in the book this three and four each time
08:09 and they designed to work together.
08:11 And then what we challenge you to do in the book is to,
08:14 not only do the challenges but before you move
08:17 on to the next chapter to journal your responses.
08:20 So if you were looking affection how did it go,
08:23 you know, were you affectionate,
08:25 what stopped you being affectionate,
08:26 and you write it all and it gives you chance really
08:29 to get the most out of these lessons
08:33 and these principles that we've been sharing with you.
08:36 What else do we have for our viewers Carolyn?
08:38 Well, I was just thinking as you were
08:40 sharing that building up our families
08:42 is a little bit like building a house.
08:43 Any of you ever had to build your own home before.
08:46 We were involved in a building project
08:48 not just that Green House that we mentioned
08:50 but our home that we now live in.
08:51 It was something we were involved in building.
08:54 And it's quiet a challenge, isn't it?
08:56 If you decide that, you know,
08:57 I think I'm done with this. What ends of happening?
09:00 We see a lot of it around as
09:01 we try for an half finished homes.
09:03 Half finished house is that we didn't take
09:05 to finish line and so it's so important to perceiver
09:09 to pursue on with all these different things
09:11 that we have learned as families that we can
09:13 build the kind of family under God
09:15 that we were seeking to build.
09:17 So each little thing that we do
09:18 is a step in that direction.
09:21 So what you are saying is what
09:23 somebody around here says quiet a bit.
09:25 We need to keep on, keeping on.
09:27 We do that's exactly right.
09:28 And, you know, there is no greater way
09:31 for you to be enriched in what
09:33 you are doing than to share it.
09:35 And you will find that as your family develops
09:39 and changes as a result of principles
09:41 that you are putting into your family.
09:43 It will become noticeable in your wider family,
09:46 at your church family, at the grocery store,
09:49 at the bank, people will notice
09:50 that your children are different.
09:52 So what we're want to challenge you to do
09:54 is the second time you run through this
09:57 whether it be the DVDs,
09:58 whether it be the 3ABN programs,
10:01 whether it be the Connected Family book,
10:03 we want to encourage you not to go alone.
10:07 First time you may have gone alone.
10:09 Count that as a training course,
10:10 the second time we want you to become
10:14 and dare I will say, I think I can say,
10:16 we want you to become Evangelists.
10:18 In other words, we want you to take the principles
10:21 that you have learned here and take somebody with you.
10:24 As Carolyn says people will have seen
10:26 if you have been watching these programs
10:28 and you've been implementing
10:29 some of these things, there's been changes.
10:31 Even, even though you, may not,
10:33 sorry to interrupt. Go ahead, go ahead.
10:34 Even though you may not feel or see the changes
10:37 yourself particularly, you will be surprised
10:39 that people will come up to you
10:41 and just make some kind of comment
10:42 that were in reference to that.
10:44 So don't be discouraged when you look
10:46 all you see is what needs to be done
10:47 because when I look at our family
10:49 and I look at my children, if I am not too careful
10:52 I would just see all the things
10:54 that I haven't conquered yet rather than
10:56 all the victories we had up till now.
10:58 And you have, we have covered
11:00 a great amount of ground in this.
11:02 And as Carolyn is saying we don't often
11:05 look behind us to the ground where we covered.
11:07 We are always, looking ahead thinking,
11:09 oh my children are still this
11:10 and my children are still that,
11:12 or I am still this or still that.
11:14 Friends, we've done a lot of intensive
11:17 parenting over these last programs.
11:20 But as we go in next time round we want you to take
11:23 somebody with you so that you can
11:26 be a blessing to somebody else.
11:27 And when they say oh we are really struggling with this,
11:30 giving our children affection business.
11:32 You can say oh yeah we struggled
11:34 in that areas well and we still do.
11:36 And the Rayne's family still does.
11:37 But friends it's such a blessing to give
11:41 and as we give our experience
11:43 whether it will be small or large
11:45 we will receive a great blessing.
11:47 So I don't know if you are thinking of somebody
11:49 right now who can we go through this together with.
11:52 You know, you might want to go through it
11:53 as a church you might want to go through it
11:57 as a small group or something.
11:59 You might want to get a few of you
12:00 together on the same street.
12:02 Get together, watch the program,
12:04 talk about it and compare notes.
12:08 Carolyn, we have some other resources
12:11 that we wanted to share with our viewers.
12:14 What, you and I've been
12:15 doing these programs the last,
12:18 who knows how long but, you know,
12:19 what do we do most of the time,
12:22 our family, in the mixed into the
12:24 home school and the normal family life.
12:26 Well for the most part we travel around the country.
12:28 We also do go overseas.
12:30 We work with another family, the Walter's family.
12:33 And they are associates with us.
12:34 And speaking, they do a lot more
12:36 the international stuff that we do for right now.
12:38 But we travel all over giving seminars,
12:41 sharing in churches, sharing in small groups,
12:44 and Camp Meetings, Family Camp Meetings,
12:47 these very same principles that you've been
12:49 hearing here week after week.
12:50 And we have also, Restoration International,
12:53 has a family magazine.
12:56 We put this together for the specific reason
12:59 of sending encouragement out to parents.
13:02 I mean, where can you read a good magazine
13:06 on a wholesome family stuff?
13:07 It's not easy to find not full of ads.
13:10 There is not one ad.
13:12 Well I think there is half
13:13 a page of ad, but it is advertising
13:15 Restoration International materials.
13:17 Not bunches of ads. It's just solid
13:21 there is a section there about for women.
13:23 There is a section there for men.
13:24 There's a section on money management.
13:27 It's all family related. It's just a small magazine.
13:30 It's the same size as the Connected Family book.
13:33 And it's very useful, very enjoyable.
13:36 I think actually even it's still free of charge
13:39 or there might be a small contribution involved but,
13:42 you know, get hold of that for every family magazine.
13:45 And you can get hold of that again
13:47 by going to restoration -international.org.
13:51 We will send that out to you.
13:52 That'll be another form of encouragement.
13:54 You know, going back to the...
13:56 going back to here is the children.
13:58 Hi! You can sit down by mommy,
14:00 going back to Family Camp Meetings
14:02 and children you've come in a good time.
14:04 Can you put you on the spot? Hannah!
14:06 We were just telling our viewers
14:08 about Family Camp Meeting.
14:10 What is it that you, what you go first,
14:14 explain a little bit what
14:15 Family Camp Meeting is? I was gonna say,
14:16 a Family Camp Meeting they happen in many
14:19 locations here in the US and basically the
14:22 Family Camp Meetings is where
14:23 families come together, Wednesday to Sunday
14:26 and the seminars very much, all the topics that
14:29 we've talked about is all based on
14:31 some family marriage and the personal walk.
14:33 And it's all extremely practical when you come to
14:35 Camp Meeting you're gonna go away with things
14:38 to do that will be a change in your family
14:40 until the next time you come together.
14:42 And there are four messages a day
14:46 and you get to stay in a cabin or a tent
14:48 or in your RV or whatever you want to do
14:50 and the beauty of Family Camp Meeting is,
14:52 it is not just your family sitting on the couch
14:54 listing to these principles,
14:56 there are hundreds of different families.
14:58 There all in different ages and stages.
15:00 Some have been there for the last ten years.
15:02 Some, it's there very first time.
15:04 And you are gonna meet with families
15:06 and you are gonna go, oh wow!
15:07 They understand what I am going through.
15:10 They understand exactly how I think about this.
15:13 And so that's the beauty of Family Camp Meeting.
15:16 Very good. Thank you Carolyn.
15:18 Hannah, what is it that you enjoy about
15:22 Family Camp Meetings, tell our viewers
15:23 because I know what you like already.
15:26 Well I enjoy the other people that you can
15:28 meet there and the music we have there.
15:31 The young people do music together
15:33 and it's just a lot of opportunities to meet
15:36 new people and to enjoy each other.
15:39 Now how does that, you're talking about
15:41 the music, just explain, mommy said that
15:44 there is four meetings everyday.
15:45 Where does the music fit into all that?
15:48 Well there is music before each meeting.
15:50 So the sing, most sing a few hymns before each meeting.
15:53 You know, the young people will go out fun
15:55 and sing those and you can
15:57 play instruments or whatever you prefer.
15:59 So it's great parents to see
16:02 the stage is just filled with, you know,
16:05 a 150 children and some of them are singing
16:08 and some of them, you know,
16:09 they have got there their nose or whatever.
16:12 But they, they just up there having a great time.
16:15 Sometimes the children are shy to go up.
16:17 So mom and dad go up with them.
16:18 It's truly is a blessing to see
16:21 all the children up there.
16:22 Caleb, what are some of the other things
16:23 that happened at Family Camp Meeting?
16:26 Well, there are different games that you can do.
16:29 We, sometimes, do Freeze Tag
16:31 or if it's raining we do indoor games and...
16:33 What Freeze Tag? Tell our viewers,
16:36 I think they probably know.
16:37 But explain, you know, how many people are play this?
16:40 Who's playing first of all? Well, everybody joins...
16:43 Even the grandmas and grandpas?
16:46 Because this is called Family Freeze Tag.
16:49 Everybody joins and they have a person who is,
16:52 towards others people and they go catch other people.
16:56 All right and you enjoy that.
16:58 You enjoy, it's the children enjoy it because,
17:01 you know, they sit in the meetings.
17:03 There are no separate meetings
17:05 for one age and then another age.
17:06 Everybody is together and yes sometimes
17:08 it's a little noisy but, you know, we don't care.
17:11 We can just crank up the PI a little bit.
17:14 The enjoyment is that everybody
17:16 is in all the meetings.
17:17 There are meetings on marriage,
17:19 there is meetings on parenting,
17:20 there is messages for families similar
17:24 what you have been seeing and hear on Happy the Home.
17:27 And then there is, Hannah give some messages.
17:29 We give messages as a family.
17:31 So there is whole mix bag.
17:33 There is usually a family panel where
17:36 we as the speakers are upfront
17:38 just sitting behind the table,
17:39 and you get to ask us whatever
17:40 questions on your heart. You can do anonymously.
17:43 So you don't have to be embarrassed
17:45 by people thinking that,
17:46 oh so they want to know about that.
17:48 But you can ask those kind of questions
17:50 when your sitting there thinking,
17:51 if only I can ask where you get
17:53 an opportunity to do that very thing.
17:55 Even to asking people like Caleb.
17:58 Questions that you want to ask,
18:00 how old you are now? Twelve-year-old.
18:02 You know, we spend a lot of our time
18:03 between those meetings as well,
18:05 meeting with people one-on-one.
18:07 And you know, as diverse and as useful as television is,
18:13 what I would like to do is
18:15 I would like you are in our living room.
18:17 But I would like to out to sit down
18:19 with you and have you talk to me.
18:22 We've been talking to you all the time.
18:23 But it's only one way.
18:24 But, you know, if you come to
18:25 Family Camp Meeting we can sit down
18:27 and we can go for a walk together.
18:29 Now Hannah, I am putting you on the spot again.
18:32 Can you tell our viewers where all the
18:35 Camp Meetings are and, you know,
18:36 approximately what time of year they are?
18:39 Well there's one Family Camp Meeting
18:41 in February and that's in Florida.
18:44 And then there is one in
18:46 Oklahoma and that's in April.
18:48 And there is one in New Jersey
18:50 and one in United Kingdom in May
18:52 and one in Washington in June,
18:55 and one in California in July.
18:58 And there is one in Colorado,
19:00 that is end of August beginning of September,
19:03 and Virginia Family Camp Meeting
19:05 is also in September.
19:07 And there is Indiana Family Camp Meeting in October,
19:10 and Hawaii Family Camp Meeting in November.
19:16 November! November, very good.
19:18 I gave Hannah that responsibility
19:20 because I know, I would mess it up.
19:22 You know, those days do change a little bit.
19:25 So you want to make sure that you check out
19:28 restoration- international.org,
19:30 because that has the latest dates.
19:32 And if you did want to go any of those events
19:35 you can register online normally,
19:37 you know, three or four months
19:38 before it happens or three months before it happens.
19:41 And so you can make sure that you have got
19:42 your cabin and you know, all the cost.
19:44 So there isn't actually any cost involved
19:46 in attending the meetings, it never has been
19:48 and by God's grace it never will be.
19:50 The only cost is, you know, your meals
19:52 and your accommodation.
19:55 And the reason that we are taking the time
19:57 in this program is because this is our last program
20:00 in the 26 that we've gone through.
20:02 We've covered a tremendous amount of ground.
20:05 And we pray that you have been encouraged.
20:08 But, you know, there is, there is
20:12 a need for us to not just settle where we are.
20:16 So the challenge is that we've put out to you,
20:19 is to go back round and do the whole series again,
20:24 as if you have never heard it before.
20:26 And you can that in a number of ways.
20:28 You can get the DVDs, may be you can get the DVDs
20:32 and you could get a case of books or whatever
20:35 and you could do it together as a church.
20:37 Or maybe you could get onto you Pastor
20:39 and say, hey we want to do this together
20:41 as a church, or your Family life leader or whatever.
20:45 Sometimes we will go to a church
20:47 and we will kick that off get it started so to speak
20:51 and then obviously we can't be there for
20:53 26 weeks or if you do two a week, 13 weeks.
20:56 But at least we can be there for
20:57 the weekend and get the ball rolling.
21:00 And then you can go over it all again
21:02 and get the blessing of these principles I wish,
21:05 we have notes as we've gone through these programs
21:10 but we have missed that so much after the each program.
21:13 We say to each other, oh we didn't say this
21:15 and we didn't say that. Well that's why
21:17 there is a beauty in the book
21:19 and in the programs because both are quite different.
21:22 There are things in the book that we've never shared
21:24 with you on the programs and then there are things
21:26 on the programs that we feel,
21:27 how we never put that in the book
21:29 and so we are just kind of glad that Lord is merciful
21:32 and He has given us both mediums
21:34 and wish to share with our hearts
21:35 because we've had so much we wanted to share
21:38 that we put into both formats.
21:40 So Hannah and Caleb, again none of these is
21:43 in our notes where we're going outside
21:45 of the book and outside of the program,
21:47 but you live up in the Northwest corner of Montana.
21:53 And you've really never known anything of life
21:57 outside of these principles that we have been talking.
22:00 Now you've seen a lot of life.
22:01 You have traveled and you been up at
22:04 2'o clock in the morning in the airport
22:06 and you've been hold off here
22:08 and all kinds of different places.
22:10 So you've seen a lot of places.
22:12 You've seen a lot of children.
22:14 How, I am just asking you, how is the upbringing
22:19 that your parents are putting you through?
22:23 Is it, I will address this to Hannah first.
22:25 You are the older one.
22:26 What do you see is the benefits, Hannah?
22:28 Or what do you see as the drawbacks,
22:30 just be totally honest?
22:32 Well, I think it's a good thing that we were,
22:34 that you've raised us this way because
22:36 who knows what we could be doing,
22:37 or what we would be, who hadn't. Okay.
22:40 And we wouldn't have the opportunity to go
22:41 Family Camp Meetings probably
22:43 and to know the people we know and to,
22:46 have the opportunity to do things that we do know.
22:49 What about when we, a term that we use
22:51 in our family regularly is, 'crossing your will'?
22:54 What if when we say Hannah that the
22:57 dressing room here at the Studio is a mess?
23:01 And do we have to say that?
23:03 Of course. Of course.
23:04 Do you appreciate to saying that,
23:06 does it bug you, or would you rather be just,
23:10 you know, do things your own way?
23:12 Well, just tell us what do you think be honest.
23:14 In the moment is not always and I was like,
23:16 oh great, the dressing rooms are in mess.
23:18 Oh wow! But in the long term
23:21 then yeah I'm very thankful that
23:22 I don't have to just do my own way.
23:25 I know mother has poured hours
23:27 and hours into teaching you how to cook?
23:30 Is it a joy now that you can pretty much fix anything?
23:32 Yeah. Now Caleb,
23:35 how is it for you when you're on your
23:37 second math lesson of the day
23:38 because you didn't do your first one quick enough
23:40 and Daddy or Mommy were been strict on you?
23:43 Have you appreciated?
23:44 Do you appreciate the strictness
23:46 or what aspects of what we do that you appreciate?
23:50 Well, as Hannah said I am just glad we can be up
23:53 in country because other places that wouldn't,
23:57 I don't think can be fine.
23:58 I remember when you are very little you said you wanted
24:00 to live next to Wal-Mart. Do you remember that?
24:03 He wanted to live between Super One and Wal-Mart.
24:05 Then he thought it would be really convenient because,
24:07 you know, get your groceries at one store
24:08 and your other stuff in another store.
24:10 You wouldn't have to go very far.
24:11 You still want to do that?
24:12 Probably, glad not to go very far
24:15 but I wouldn't want to live there.
24:17 See that's another aspect that we have not covered
24:19 in any of these programs, is the beauty
24:23 and the value and the benefits of country living.
24:26 But I know that we cover that every year
24:29 with our Family Camp Meeting.
24:30 There is some practical how to's,
24:32 on relocating your family.
24:35 In fact Tom Walters, our Associate in Ministry,
24:38 used to be a realtor. And often times
24:40 he's talking people through
24:41 how to get out of the rat race,
24:44 out into the countryside because the countryside
24:46 is a great place to bring up a family.
24:49 It's the headquarters for a family.
24:51 Well, you know, we gonna have to take
24:52 a break at this point and we will be back
24:55 just very shortly to give you the final challenge,
25:00 and we are going to have prayer together as a family.
25:02 So join us in just a few moments.