Participants: Paul & Carolyn Rayne (Host), Hannah & Caleb Rayne
Series Code: HTH
Program Code: HTH00008A
00:01 God takes great delight in blessing us and we enjoy it.
00:04 As parents we can show our love by unselfishly giving
00:10 to our precious children.
00:11 Join us today for Happy the Home, today's program is
00:14 entitled But It's Not My Birthday.
00:40 Thank you for inviting us back into your living room
00:43 for another Happy the Home and we are really looking
00:47 forward to this program that is entitled,
00:49 But It's Not My Birthday.
00:51 Before we get into it though I would like to
00:54 introduce you again to my family.
00:56 We have Carolyn in the pink there, you're not going to
01:01 say anything for us this time Carolyn?
01:03 Oh, I will say lots. - OK, all right.
01:05 And Caleb, tell the viewers again how old you are.
01:07 I'm 12 years old and I'm Caleb Rayne.
01:11 Caleb Rayne, and who are you madam? of course I know.
01:15 I'm Hannah Rayne, - your Hannah and how old are you?
01:18 14- 14 well, we are not all on the set, the whole family,
01:21 every time, this time we are.
01:24 The children are going to be coming and going but we
01:27 are from a ministry called Restoration International
01:30 and we are delighted to be with you today.
01:33 Happy the Home program number 8 it is today and that
01:38 corresponds with Chapter number eight in the 'Connected
01:42 Family', the companion book that goes with this program.
01:46 Again we encourage you to get that, not so that we can
01:49 get lots of money, because you don't get lots of money
01:53 from writing books these days, but that you can get the
01:56 most out of these programs.
01:58 That is really the written form and this is what
02:01 you watch and then the whole thing is that you are meant to
02:05 do something with the knowledge and the reading that you gained.
02:08 So Caleb and Hannah I want to ask you a question.
02:12 I happen to know, as your daddy, that your birthdays
02:15 are coming up here in the next couple weeks.
02:17 Do you look forward to your birthdays?
02:21 Hannah we will start with you, do you look forward to your
02:23 birthday? - in some ways but it is not as big of a deal
02:26 as I get older, it was when I was younger.
02:29 - so when you were little you really look forward to it?
02:32 Yeah. - but now you are a teenager it's not so much
02:35 a big deal? - yeah.
02:37 Is that because we don't buy you big enough gifts or what?
02:40 No, it's not like gifts, I just can't wait to get a gift.
02:44 Do you think when you get to be 18 or 19 birthdays might
02:49 become important to you again because soon you will be 20?
02:52 Maybe. - but you are not interested at the moment.
02:55 How about you Caleb? I'm interested sometimes, sometimes
03:00 my birthdays are fun and sometimes they're not.
03:02 - over really. - no it's not that.
03:05 Are you looking forward to this birthday that is coming
03:07 up? - hopefully I don't know what's going to happen but.
03:12 So what normally happens on your birthday, is it just a
03:15 day that comes and goes and parents don't recognize it?
03:18 Or what? - no we usually have a special meal and we
03:21 open gifts and do stuff.
03:23 - all right. - so what kind of things, we usually go
03:28 somewhere special for the birthdays, because what
03:31 happens viewers is that the children's birthdays are
03:34 2 days apart and then four days later it's Paul's birthday
03:37 so we have a whole week of birthdays in our home.
03:40 We usually go somewhere special and celebrate all three
03:44 at one time, where do we usually go Hannah?
03:46 We go to Fairmont Hot Springs which is a place we can, it's a
03:52 pool up in Canada. - it's a beautiful place in Canada,
03:54 as Hannah says, Fairmount Hot Springs and we go there as
03:58 a family and stay in a hotel overnight and pretty much
04:00 spend our whole time soaking up the natural hot springs.
04:03 A very healthy place to go and of course their birthdays
04:07 are in January, it often is snowing and we are sitting
04:12 outside in the hot pools.
04:13 Your hair gets all frosty white but that is another story.
04:16 It makes me think, it was a few years ago, it was actually
04:20 on the day of Hannah's eighth birthday.
04:23 Caleb's and birthday comes two days later so he is two years
04:26 and 2 days younger than Hannah.
04:28 So we are just walking into the hotel with all our stuff,
04:31 Hannah's eighth birthday, we're carrying in her gift bag.
04:35 She hasn't opened her gifts and Caleb makes a classic
04:38 statement. What did you say can you remember Caleb?
04:41 I said I wanted to be born-again because I wanted to
04:45 be before Hannah's birthday so I would get
04:48 my gifts before then.
04:50 So I said as we were walking how I wanted to
04:52 be born-again. Still I want our children to
04:56 be born-again.
04:57 You know it's cute, every year, off course he understands
05:00 now, but when he was younger he couldn't figure how come
05:02 Hannah got her birthday gifts and it was two days before
05:05 his, but those were the longest 2 days of his whole year.
05:08 So he wants to know, can I be born-again.
05:10 Well he said son you certainly can.
05:13 The thing is Caleb, you said it quite quietly then.
05:17 I remember it was as we walked in the revolving doors
05:21 into this hotel and as we walked in Caleb said I wish
05:24 I could be born-again.
05:26 The lady at the desk kind of thought, what is the
05:28 six-year-old coming in talking about?
05:30 I mean you just had to be there I guess.
05:32 It was one of those classics we will not forget.
05:35 Anyway we do like buying you gifts, you know that?
05:39 You usually do get gifts on your birthday and it is kind of
05:42 fun, isn't it?
05:43 Now Hannah I wonder, could you go and start fixing the
05:45 meal? -Sure! Could you do that for me?
05:47 Caleb I would like you to go and get that ironing
05:50 finished that you have been trying to get done.
05:51 Then you can come back in a little bit.
05:53 Thanks children. - you know if we, there is a
05:58 scripture here I want to call our attention to.
06:00 It is found in Matthew 7:11 and it goes like this.
06:07 "If you then being evil, know how to give good gifts
06:13 "to your children, how much more will your Father
06:17 "who is in heaven, give good things to them
06:21 "that ask Him?"
06:23 You know I think most parents enjoy giving gifts to
06:28 their children, but think about it in the spiritual sense.
06:31 If we still even after 6000 years of degenerated
06:36 in selfishness and sin still enjoy giving to our children,
06:41 how much more does God enjoy giving gifts to us?
06:46 And think about it for a moment, why does God like giving
06:51 gifts to us, His children?
06:53 Well because He's a generous God, He's a good God and
06:56 He is a God that wants to see us blessed.
07:00 He wants to see us happy and you know as parents we want
07:04 to see our children blessed and we want to see them happy.
07:06 I think that's why the tradition of giving gifts at
07:10 birthday time has stuck around for so many generations.
07:14 You know God gives those blessings to us also to get our
07:19 attention, to point us in His direction because that is
07:23 where we have our greatest blessing.
07:25 He does it every day, the beautiful views out of
07:28 these windows, the beauty that God has created
07:31 for us for our enjoyment.
07:32 Certain people like waterfalls, somebody else it's flowers
07:36 for me it's the birds and where ever we have lived,
07:40 we have lived in many different parts of the world, where
07:42 ever we have lived I've gotten tuned in to the local bird
07:45 life that is there because I really enjoy that.
07:48 For many, many years I have felt a deep impression in my
07:52 heart as I see the birds there, that is God's way of
07:55 saying, I love you.
07:56 Different birds come each day and I hear the message
07:59 coming from God to me through His nature.
08:02 But Carolyn, God doesn't just send birds on your
08:07 birthday, He sends the birds all time.
08:11 He has sent me specific bird on my birthday that I have
08:14 never seen any other day.
08:15 I remember one time it was your, ah well for the sake of
08:19 our viewers I won't tell you what number birthday it was
08:22 but I do remember having breakfast and looking out the
08:25 window, of course we live in the Northwest corner of
08:27 Montana. - you could say it I was 40. - you were 40.
08:30 There was these big brown bears that stood up standing
08:33 by the tree right outside of the window and we thought
08:35 oh hoe it's mommy's birthday bear.
08:37 It wasn't a bird at that time - it wasn't a bird it was a bear
08:41 But you know that's God's action to show His love to us.
08:45 We want to show that loving action to our children.
08:50 As Paul said we just don't do it on the birthdays,
08:53 we shared with the children that we expect to have a gift
08:56 on the birthdays, Christmas's or some special occasion.
08:59 But what about what is not expected?
09:01 What about ministering to our children's hearts?
09:04 This is an opportunity to fulfill the dreams that
09:07 we have been talking about for our children.
09:11 It's a time for action, and we are going to have some action
09:14 today hidden behind the woodpile in the fireplace is a
09:19 gift for Caleb and when he comes back he doesn't know
09:21 anything about it and on the table he's going
09:24 to ask me what's that envelope?
09:25 Ah it's just something of mommies, in there is an
09:28 announcement for him that
09:30 we are going to take him to Kitty Hawk and he doesn't
09:33 know that yet, so we are going to surprise him.
09:36 For those of you who do not know what Caroline's meaning
09:38 by Kitty Hawk, you have to go back to program number 4
09:43 and there we were challenging you as the viewers to,
09:46 we have done it as well, to discover our children's
09:50 dreams and we know it is one of Caleb dreams
09:52 to go to Kitty Hawk, the place where the Wright brothers
09:56 flew the first airplane over there on the East Coast
09:59 of the USA. - that's been his dream for 3 years or so.
10:04 We have never been able to pull it off.
10:06 But right live on this program, Caleb knows nothing about it.
10:10 We are going, he is hiding in the back room right now.
10:14 We are going to announce that to him right here on the
10:18 set, but I want to clarify for the viewers.
10:22 We have come to the point that birthdays and Christmas
10:26 children expect gifts, and we are not going to deal with
10:30 that issue necessarily, but we want to challenge you in
10:33 this program to be fulfilling, as Carolyn was starting
10:38 to say there, to fulfill a dream of your children's.
10:42 Today is the day for action.
10:44 In program number four we were talking about discovering
10:48 their dreams, and maybe you have done some talking
10:50 backwards and forwards as mom and dad.
10:53 Now is the time, today is the program that we want you to
10:57 actually do it.
10:59 There is an old saying in the world, it says actions
11:02 speak louder than words.
11:05 Today is the day for action.
11:08 Maybe some of the dreams that your children have cannot
11:12 be fulfilled right today, maybe it will take a bit more
11:14 planning than that, then today is the day to make a grand
11:18 announcement, it doesn't have to be grand but it has to
11:22 be thoughtful and so that is what we are going to with
11:26 Caleb in just a moment or two.
11:28 You know it is really important that you count the cost
11:31 first, particularly if you have younger children because
11:35 if you say this is what we are going to do and you don't
11:37 follow through, that is kind of gutting to them it's devastating
11:42 to them, particularly for younger children.
11:44 Even for older ones too, so when you come out and say
11:47 guess what children, this is what's going to happen and
11:50 it's one of their dreams, be sure you are going to
11:52 follow through with that dream.
11:54 So were having to be very sure too, to follow through what
11:58 we are going to say, right?
11:59 Yeah, yeah, you know I mentioned this in the previous
12:03 program, a friend of mine, a Pastor friend when he was
12:08 growing up his family were quite, they didn't have a lot
12:14 of money and he for some reason, I forget the reason
12:18 he did tell me, his dad came home from work
12:23 and brought with him a softball.
12:26 He just gave it to him wrapped up and said, hey son
12:30 I have something special for you.
12:33 And you know Lloyd is the name of my friend, what touched
12:38 his heart to the point that he remembers it to this day
12:42 and what touched his heart was he knew his parents were
12:45 hard up, and he knew this was a brand-new softball.
12:50 This wasn't a used one, this was new,
12:52 it was bought especially for him.
12:54 Like I say he's 45 and this happened when he was in his
12:58 early teens and he can remember to this day the effect
13:02 that had on his heart.
13:04 It drew his heart out to his parents, so this whole
13:07 section that we are in right now in Happy The Home,
13:11 oh we have Hannah back here.
13:14 I put the oven on 375 is that right?
13:16 That will be perfect, yes, do you want to go see it
13:20 Caleb is done with ironing, if he is he can comeback.
13:24 You know today my friend remembers that softball as a
13:28 very touching experience, so we want to encourage you
13:32 into action, do something special for your children.
13:36 We don't want you to go and blow a bunch of money
13:40 you don't have and run up the credit card or whatever.
13:43 We are just asking you to be thoughtful about something
13:47 that you can do for your children.
13:49 We are going to share some of the things that we have
13:51 done for our children and I think Carolyn you were going
13:54 to be talking. I was going one thing? Make sure
13:57 when you do fulfill your children's dreams that is
14:00 who's dreams you are fulfilling and not yours.
14:02 As you know we have dreams too, don't we as adults.
14:06 I know my dear wife, we are going to talk a little bit
14:08 more about love languages later on but Caroline's love
14:11 language is giving gifts. - and getting them
14:15 well both because you tend to get to your own love
14:18 language and often times for my birthday she will buy me
14:22 something, just being real honest here, it's like, yeah,
14:27 that's great, thank you dear.
14:29 It's like it's not what I wanted at all.
14:31 I don't really care for gifts, but Caroline really does.
14:36 Actually Caleb, you really like gifts don't you?
14:39 Um Hum. - that's definitely one of his things.
14:41 So now have we ever gotten you children a gift when it
14:47 wasn't your birthday? Hannah can you think of something?
14:49 Yet when I got Cuddles my kitten.
14:51 Oh, your kitten Cuddles, oh wouldn't it be cute if
14:56 she was wandering around here?
14:57 She would be chewing up all the cables right?
15:00 She is big on chewing up things.
15:02 So your kitten Cuddles, how long have you wanted a kitten
15:05 for? Since I was three, so it's been 10 years.
15:08 Wow, so kittens aren't expensive so how come you didn't
15:15 get one for years and years?
15:17 Because you didn't like kittens.
15:21 We are being really honest with you now, I'm a bird lover.
15:23 Bird lovers are not usually cat lovers.
15:26 As a child growing up my neighbors cats would come and
15:29 eat the birds that I was feeding and it really bothered me.
15:31 I would try to get rid of cats so I had a real distaste
15:34 for cats and here's my daughter, her longing of her
15:37 heart is a cat. Oh no! How did that happen?
15:40 This selfish parent does not want to fulfill that dream.
15:43 So for years we didn't, just being very honest.
15:46 Then one day what did God send our way?
15:48 Well I think we were outside and this ginger cat came
15:53 walking along so we wanted to take her in
15:57 and play with her.
15:58 What did I want to do? - Get rid of her!
16:01 I tried my best, she's bothering my birds.
16:03 We were gone for two weeks and we came home, there was
16:07 Snow, it's November and we came home and what do we see
16:09 right after Thanksgiving, what do we see?
16:11 Little kitty footprints on the porch.
16:13 Cat footprints eating bird food then the cat started climbing
16:17 the screen, remember that? - yeah!
16:18 Caleb asked me, he said mommy can I go outside and pet
16:22 the cat, because he felt so sorry for this cat?
16:24 My husband looked at me and said, you are so heartless.
16:27 I felt really bad so I said sure go get your boots on
16:33 and when he went out to get his boots I opened the door
16:35 and the cat came in and I shut the door.
16:38 He came back and he went oh mommy the cats in the house.
16:44 Friends I knew what I had to do, we was going to have to
16:46 take care of this cat and it wasn't going to be outside.
16:49 The cat and I could watch the birds from inside.
16:52 So that was five or six years ago that cat showed up,
16:56 but it wasn't a child loving cat was it? - No!
16:59 So anyway we managed to find a little five week old
17:02 Kitten. - tell a little bit about the story, tell the
17:06 viewers about when we were going to the Minnesota family
17:08 camp meeting and what you have by the side of your bed.
17:12 Well I had the pictures of the kitten right next to my
17:16 bed so I could look at them when I was asleep.
17:18 - look at them while you were asleep, that's really
17:22 good. - I know, before I went to sleep.
17:25 What happened if you recall was that this kitten was in local
17:28 town and we heard about it, there were three of them, and
17:31 we heard about it and we were not going to be able to
17:33 get to that town before we had to head on the road
17:35 on our travels.
17:36 We knew the kittens would be gone and someone else would
17:40 have them, so the lady e-mailed me photographs of all the
17:44 kittens and Hannah picked the one she wanted and
17:46 we called up the lady and said this is the one.
17:48 The lady was able to send us pictures and so Hannah got
17:51 to take pictures with her before she saw her kitten.
17:54 Now do we all love Cuddles? -Um Hum! -Um Hum!
17:57 She has been great and God has a way of changing hearts.
17:59 So if there is a dream your child has and it is not
18:02 your dream, God can change that.
18:05 Now I'm a bird lover and a cat lover, it's possible.
18:10 So Caleb has there been anything that you have had as
18:15 a gift that was not on your birthday?
18:18 I'm putting you on the spot here.
18:23 Sure I have. - what about when we purchased the bikes
18:27 for the whole family? Remember that?
18:28 That was around..., we had been saving that was around
18:32 nobody's birthday and what are some of the, and we have
18:35 also done some bike riding together as a family.
18:37 I know you like biking, doesn't matter whether you got seats
18:39 on the bike, or no seats, doing jumps and
18:43 going as far as you can in a day.
18:45 What were some of the places we went as a family that
18:47 was an enjoyable thing for you?
18:50 Well we went to the Hiawatha.
18:52 What's Hiawatha, explain to the viewers.
18:54 It's a trail that used to be a train track that
18:59 they made into a bike path.
19:03 Right, what is exciting about that, what does it
19:06 have on it? It has tunnels and trestles and
19:09 a whole bunch of bridges.
19:12 So one minute you are in a 1 and 1/2 long dark cold tunnel on
19:16 your bike in the pitch black which is fun and then the
19:19 next minute you are on a bridge 1000 feet above
19:21 the ground and Caleb loves that kind of thing.
19:23 So another dream, as we travel giving seminars often
19:30 times Restoration international videos seminars and it
19:35 is normally left to the older folks to run the cameras
19:40 and the audio and all of that.
19:41 Hannah and Caleb are always saying daddy, daddy can
19:44 we run the cameras and I said no sweetheart.
19:46 If I let you run the cameras because you are my children
19:50 and then all the other children are wanting to run
19:52 the cameras and it will not be fair.
19:54 One time we were in California and the youth that were
19:58 going to run the cameras, I don't know what happened but
20:01 it didn't all come together so we needed Hannah and Caleb
20:05 to run the cameras and they thought that was a not my
20:08 birthday experience because they were running cameras.
20:12 Listening on the headphones and being told to do this
20:15 and to do that and they obeyed instructions very good.
20:17 I know that was another special thing for you.
20:20 Now Caleb, we know, and the viewers know that there is
20:26 something hidden for you here today.
20:30 He wondered why you had to stay back in the back room huh?
20:34 Now if you want to go over to the fireplace and somewhere
20:37 around the fireplace there is something hidden for you.
20:41 Go quick Buddy. - because we know your love language
20:44 is gifts, right? - Um Hum!
20:46 I don't know, well it's right there Caleb back behind
20:51 the logs, do you see it?
20:53 Oh, you didn't give him a chance to look.
20:55 I want to see him open it, alright what is it?
20:58 It's a book about the Wright brothers.
21:01 You can open it up. - sorry it wasn't a very good gift
21:04 bag but that's all I could come up with.
21:06 Boys don't care about the wrappings much do they?
21:10 So what's this envelope here?
21:12 Oh come and sit down with your book first of all.
21:15 It's a pretty nice book by the way.
21:17 - you can look at it.
21:18 There's all kinds of pictures. What do you think?
21:24 It's very nice. - it is very nice isn't it?
21:26 Would there be something you might say to your mother
21:30 or your daddy? - now son you can put it on your lap
21:33 for a minute and in this envelope there is something
21:35 I want you to take out.
21:40 And turn it around or over whatever it is.
21:43 Do you see with this is? - yes it's a map.
21:47 It's a map. - of the Wright Brothers.
21:50 They came from the National Parks place.
21:53 National Monument is what it is.
21:54 Why do you think we are giving you that?
21:56 Because we're going there? - yeah!
21:58 We are going to go there. What do you think of that?
22:03 Wow, you are witnessing something on TV today that has
22:07 not quite ever happened before, Caleb is speechless.
22:12 So Caleb to make it real crystal clear after our meetings
22:18 in Roanoke in the fall, we are going to the Wright
22:23 Brothers National Monument in North Carolina and
22:27 we are going to spend a few days at Kitty Hawk.
22:30 We are going to enjoy that together as a family.
22:33 In fact we are going to tell you something, we were
22:36 going to do it next month, in February but it dawned on
22:39 us how cold it is going to be at Kitty Hawk.
22:42 - it's freezing. - We were thinking why would you go
22:44 to the beach when it's really cold,
22:46 it doesn't make any sense.
22:47 So we figured he could wait a few more months and
22:50 we could enjoy the beach when I was a little warmer.
22:52 Does that sound like a plan? - and they did it there because
22:54 there's lots of wind, it's very windy.
22:56 It wouldn't be as fun.
22:57 Hey children you can disappear because we want to talk
23:00 to the viewers for a little bit more. I so take your
23:03 book and you can cruise over that.
23:05 Thanks bud. - it's really what we want to get over to
23:13 you in this program.
23:14 Well let me back up a little bit, Happy The Home,
23:18 the series that we are running through here at the
23:21 moment, we are now here on program number eight.
23:25 Program by program we have been encouraging you to do
23:30 something very simple, to do something practical
23:34 towards winning the hearts of your children.
23:38 Obviously in this program we are calling you to make
23:44 a unexpected intelligent gift to your children.
23:49 It does not have to be an expensive gift, it has to
23:54 be a thoughtful gift.
23:56 I know there are some parents, and maybe you have been
24:01 guilty of this, we just give our children thoughtless
24:06 things just because we got to do something so
24:09 we give them those things.
24:11 You know it is thoughtful gifts that they want and another
24:14 tip is it's not necessary just things that they want.
24:19 Like Hannah's cat was a thing, but it was something she
24:24 could, it was character developing because there has
24:28 been times when we say Hannah your cat has got no food.
24:31 Oh do I have to do it all the time?
24:34 It has been teaching her responsibility as the novelty of
24:39 the kitchen wore off.
24:40 We want to encourage you to give gifts to your children
24:45 that will be character developing.
24:48 We are very happy to take Caleb to the Wright Brothers
24:53 Memorial because he has a genuine interest in science and
24:57 how things work and all of that and this can be an
24:59 aid in that direction.
25:01 It's also that we are not sending him there on his own,
25:05 it's going to be something that will be a fun memory
25:09 for us as a family.
25:11 So often we buy things for our children as a replacement
25:17 for giving ourselves to them.
25:20 I'll just buy them a bike and they can go and ride the
25:23 bike, when we bought bikes as a family,
25:26 It wasn't so they could ride bikes on their own,
25:29 of course they can but it was so we could go riding and
25:32 we have had hours, we have had tens of hours
25:35 riding our bikes together.
25:38 The joy of riding our bikes together is that I can cycle
25:41 up to Hannah and we can talk and have some one on one
25:44 time like on our last program.
25:46 Then I can go back and Caroline and I can chitchat
25:49 backwards and forwards.
25:50 So we really want to encourage you to action, now is the
25:54 time for action, don't just let this program go by
25:58 because an intelligent gift for your children can really
26:01 be an opportunity to bind them to your hearts.
26:04 We will take a break now, join us back in a few moments.