Participants: Paul & Carolyn Rayne (Host), Hannah & Caleb Rayne
Series Code: HTH
Program Code: HTH00004A
00:01 Do you know if your children
00:03 have any dreams?
00:04 Do you know if there are something
00:05 that they would really like to do
00:06 or some places they love to go,
00:08 join us today on Happy The Home
00:10 as we look at discovering their dreams.
00:40 Alright. This is looking great Caleb,
00:42 did you create this drawing yourself,
00:44 sure yeah, can I have one of those
00:46 rich things, out of your brain, oh yeah,
00:48 I suppose yeah. Oh you're landscaper,
00:50 you're architect. A architect. Okay,
00:54 do you have any flowers
00:56 I can put in there. I've one left there,
00:58 one left, suppose I'll put that in there,
01:01 okay, good job, alright, lets see,
01:04 I didn't get any, all finished look at that,
01:06 good deal. So we do things together isn't it.
01:10 It's what say again?
01:12 It's fun when we do things together.
01:13 Yeah, I think so too,
01:15 what other things have we done together
01:20 Caleb as a family that you've enjoyed?
01:24 I mean I know you like Lego
01:25 you've always like Lego,
01:26 but what other things?
01:27 We went to the Kennedy Space Center.
01:30 Yeah, Kennedy Space Center in Florida.
01:32 What was fun about that?
01:34 We got to see all the rockets
01:36 and stuff like that.
01:37 Alright, how about you Hannah,
01:39 what can you think of a fun thing
01:40 now I'm putting you on the spot here
01:42 but a fun thing that we've done together?
01:44 I enjoy skiing like our all across ski mountain,
01:47 all cross country skiing, down hill skiing,
01:49 down hill skiing. Oh, you live like speed,
01:51 yeah speed cream,
01:53 anything to do with speed,
01:55 and alright, speed for it.
01:56 So you go skiing on your own or what?
01:58 No, we go together, together aright well
02:00 mommy doesn't always go but,
02:01 getting there, getting there.
02:03 Well can you think of another think Caleb?
02:07 You can, you can figure it out,
02:17 go out to Haleakala. What is Haleakala?
02:20 It's a mountain in Hawaii. Alright, okay,
02:23 the mountain in Hawaii.
02:24 And so do we kind of soon trip
02:27 you know for the day. No, till sunset,
02:31 sunrise, sunrise, not sunset, tell our viewers,
02:36 tell our viewers, at what time did you
02:38 have to getup to do that?
02:39 About 2 O'clock or 3, in the afternoon?
02:43 No 2 in the morning, 2 in the morning, good,
02:47 it was very spectacular,
02:48 how about you Hannah one more thing
02:50 that you enjoy doing together as a family?
02:53 I enjoyed our trips to Waterton
02:55 and to Yellowstone and to different
02:58 national parks. That's good for us
02:59 'cause we live in a Montana.
03:00 Yeah, you know today's program is entitled,
03:04 I forgot the name of the title help me out family
03:08 I know it's discovering their dreams
03:12 and we are the Rayne family,
03:14 part of Restoration International
03:17 and today's program is corresponding
03:21 with chapter 4 in the book
03:23 The Connected Family,
03:25 it's the companion book that goes
03:27 with the program and again to,
03:29 to remind you it's a step-by-step guide
03:33 and we're building on previous steps,
03:36 but each program is stand alone
03:38 as well if you haven't seen
03:39 the previous programs you can just pick up
03:41 where we are or you can order the DVDs
03:44 or even better still tune
03:47 into the next program,
03:48 because program number 5 is a review,
03:51 where we're gonna the first four programs.
03:54 So that will ready to get you up to speed
03:56 and we want to discover we were talking about
03:59 some dreams of the children have had.
04:02 I know Hannah, it was a dream for many years
04:04 for her to go skiing and Caleb to go to
04:05 the top of the volcano,
04:07 but tell us some other dreams that maybe
04:12 you haven't had fulfilled.
04:13 So we, we want to know
04:16 what inside this little heart of yours
04:18 what, what dreams do you have?
04:19 Well we haven't gone to Kitty Hawk yet,
04:23 but we've tried Van Horn.
04:25 Alright so what's so exciting
04:27 about Kitty Hawk?
04:29 Well the Wright Brothers
04:31 and we read a book about Wright Brothers
04:32 and found that how they flew their airplane first,
04:36 oh it's where they test flew the airplanes
04:38 and daddy used to be into Hand gliding
04:40 and we got reading about the Wright brothers
04:43 and now Caleb wants to go to Kitty Hawk,
04:45 that's good. We should try and work that out,
04:48 you know we've tried,
04:49 we go to give meeting in Roanoke,
04:50 Virginia every year and it's not that far away
04:53 and we thought if we just pay a few extra dollars
04:55 and we could get there,
04:57 but how about you Hannah what,
04:58 what dreams have you had
05:00 that haven't been for fulfilled yet?
05:02 Well I always want to go Baffin Island
05:04 see the Northern Lights.
05:06 Baffin Island, where is that?
05:08 It's way up on the top of Canada.
05:11 The Islands of Alaska.
05:13 How did you know even about such place?
05:14 I read about in history in grade 4
05:17 I think, oh in school you know
05:18 they get to learn a lot of things in school.
05:19 So do your children,
05:21 do you think that those dreams
05:23 will ever come true? They could probably.
05:26 You seem pretty confidence
05:28 and how about you Hannah?
05:29 It could. You have a long way.
05:31 She is big on what,
05:34 what other dreams you have?
05:35 I also want to go Mexico to help
05:37 an orphanage.
05:38 So if you can't go this far North
05:41 you're gonna just head South right,
05:42 yeah she, she is, this girl likes to travel
05:44 as you can tell and of course
05:47 if you went to Mexico then you get
05:50 fulfill another dream you've got right.
05:52 Yeah, what's that one?
05:53 Yeah, I have to learn Spanish,
05:54 she's dreaming about learning Spanish
05:56 wouldn't that be fun today,
05:57 I just wanna go real quick now
05:58 tell us Caleb about your dreams
06:02 you have had for a cello.
06:03 How, how long and where you're now
06:05 in all of that? Well I've had it
06:07 for about a year, yeah
06:08 and so you've got one?
06:10 Yeah, I got, alright,
06:12 I had for about a year and we have been
06:14 doing some lessons.
06:15 And how, when was your first inklings
06:18 of wanting the cello?
06:19 Well, well when I was 4, 4 and your 12
06:23 now that's a long time to hope for something.
06:26 We, we have pictures of Caleb
06:27 when he was 4 with a child's guitar
06:31 and stick duck taped to the bottom
06:33 and a cardboard bow
06:35 and he's practicing the cello.
06:36 So these are really,
06:39 really moved on right.
06:40 Now there the Indiana family
06:41 camp meeting there you are with all
06:43 the other people doing your bit.
06:45 That was a real dream come true
06:46 wasn't it that to get your cello to Indiana.
06:48 Now Hannah, you had a musical dream fulfilled,
06:50 tell us a little about that?
06:52 Well I always want to play the flute
06:54 and then we're talking to a friend at one
06:56 of the camp, family camp meetings
06:58 and they had a flute,
07:00 they were not using any more
07:01 and so they gave at to me,
07:03 so I was young.
07:04 Wow! That's a dream come to true yeah,
07:06 and so did you just dream about
07:08 flute or what? No,
07:10 I hoped for it and prayed for it.
07:11 Oh, you prayed for it,
07:12 that's pretty important, prayer.
07:14 Well it's not quite bed time yet,
07:16 but you kids can go often play
07:18 your instruments for a while
07:20 if you want mummy and daddy
07:21 can I have a bit of time together
07:24 with the viewers so we love you
07:26 but it's time for you to get out of here.
07:32 You know, suddenly Hannah didn't mention
07:34 was her desire to take care of her home duties.
07:38 That is quite unusual for a young lady
07:40 I realize, but you know we shared
07:42 in the previous program that's if you could
07:45 encourage your little children in the kitchen
07:48 when they really have the enthusiasm
07:49 then when they get into their teen years
07:52 they'll want to do it and they'll be profession
07:54 and this summer I had the health issues
07:57 and I wasn't able to run the home
07:59 as I usually do and Hannah was able to
08:02 pick up all home duties and for the whole summer
08:04 she got to do that.
08:06 You might think well that's kind of a drag
08:07 for a young girl but you know
08:09 she got a real thrill out of that didn't she?
08:11 What, what I, I said to her
08:12 I said how is it and she says
08:14 well it's hard work. And so she got a little bit of
08:17 a taste of what you have do on a regular basis.
08:19 Yeah, yeah, the tractor also Caleb has,
08:24 he's asked again and again and again,
08:27 can I drive the tractor,
08:28 well you can do a lot of damage with that
08:30 thing even though he's little but you know he's,
08:33 he's able and I've let him drive it
08:35 and he drove it around to the neighbors
08:37 one time just on I driveway
08:38 and their driveway and you could just,
08:41 I can just sense in him that
08:43 there is a principle, the spiritual principle
08:47 that trust awakens trust and love awakens
08:51 love and as I let Caleb fulfill one of his dreams
08:56 in driving the tractor,
08:58 I could just tell that his heart opened up
09:01 and I don't really want to do it,
09:03 because it's to me last the fix it
09:06 if he bumps into a tree or whatever.
09:07 You know moving on, our children, all have dreams.
09:15 Now when they're younger and you say hey you know
09:18 what some of your dreams?
09:19 You saw the hesitation in our children
09:21 it was like I don't know,
09:24 but if you probe around a little bit
09:26 and that's the practical assignment
09:29 we want to give you for this program and the,
09:31 the reason for it is because later on
09:34 in the Happy the Home series
09:36 we are going to give you an opportunity
09:40 to fulfill some of the dreams of your children.
09:44 It's part of winning their affections,
09:47 drawing them close to us,
09:49 so that we can take them close to God.
09:52 So this is another practical step
09:54 and so what they want me to do as,
09:57 is to find out some of the dreams
10:00 of your children.
10:01 We're gonna talk a little bit about
10:03 some of the dreams of our children
10:04 have had and we've done that already,
10:07 but we're gonna talk about how we can
10:08 fulfill some of those. They're well out of ear
10:10 short now, you know one thing we have
10:15 discovered Carolyn and I,
10:17 I think we did what most parents did
10:19 and that is when our children were young
10:21 we got them loads of toys
10:23 and you know we would go to the store
10:25 and oh this would be nice
10:27 and that would be nice and I'm not by any
10:29 stretch here and you can chip in here
10:31 Carolyn if you think
10:32 I'm getting this slightly out of balance,
10:35 becausee you and I have had some talks
10:36 about this. It's not just toys
10:40 that they need I,
10:41 I think children need some toys
10:43 and good joyful toys but we tend to buy them stuff
10:47 as a replacement for giving them
10:50 our attention and so I could buy Caleb
10:54 a play tractor and that would keep him
10:56 happy for a while but eventually
10:58 he's gonna want to drive my tractor
11:02 and so you know we've,
11:04 we've got to in a, discover in their dreams,
11:07 we've got to get a little bit involved
11:09 in trying to fulfill some of these,
11:11 not in this program but later on
11:13 but now we want you to try and figure out
11:15 some of your children's dreams
11:16 remember those dreams might well be something
11:20 that involves you to be out facilitate
11:23 it happening, Hannah wants to go to
11:25 Baffin Island, she's not gonna get there
11:27 for a long time on her own,
11:29 and Caleb wants to go Kitty Hawk,
11:32 we'll talk a little bit more about Kitty Hawk
11:34 in a few minutes. I want you to spend
11:38 a little bit of time here
11:39 talking about a scripture, Malachi,
11:43 which is the last book of the Old Testament.
11:46 Malachi chapter 4 and verse 6,
11:49 I'm gonna read it here in the,
11:50 in the New King James
11:52 and I'm also gonna read it again
11:53 in the New International Version because
11:56 it's kind of slightly different but
11:57 the same meaning it says in the King James,
11:59 Malachi 4:6 it says and He talking about God,
12:03 will turn the hearts of the fathers
12:06 to their children, and the hearts of the
12:10 children to their fathers.
12:11 Now what's so significant about that
12:14 verse is to, to me because
12:17 it got my attention because it's to fathers
12:19 but it got my attention also because
12:21 there is an order of events there,
12:24 first of all God is wanting to turn
12:27 our hearts towards our children
12:31 and then almost as a consequence of that,
12:37 because we're turning our hearts to them
12:39 as God works in us,
12:40 that He will turn their hearts towards us
12:45 and that's really what we're trying to get at.
12:47 Now in the NIV 2010,
12:49 it's slightly different it says He will turn
12:53 the hearts of the parents to their
12:56 children, so moms you're in this is well.
12:58 We need to open up our hearts to our
13:02 children and what do I mean by that I,
13:04 I don't want it to be a cliche, we,
13:06 we need to enter into their world,
13:08 we need to find out what makes them tick,
13:11 we need to find out what their dreams are.
13:13 I mean so it's, it's so easy to parents to,
13:16 yeah our kids would like to go to Baffin Island
13:19 but dream on buddy.
13:21 Well in our case Hannah can't we be
13:26 a bit more interest in that,
13:27 it doesn't have to be any thing grand
13:31 you know Hannah wanted that flute,
13:33 and I don't know how much a flute cost
13:36 you know 200, 300, 500 dollars
13:38 but she prayed about that.
13:41 Well I'm just thinking as you're talking
13:44 that it wouldn't take much for us to be out
13:48 to make Kitty Hawk this year.
13:49 You know we go to Virginia in fact
13:54 we go to Virginia in a few weeks well
13:56 it's not gonna work then,
13:58 it's not gonna work then but we could do
13:59 in September when we go to Virginia,
14:00 why don't we just cut out the time
14:02 and make sure that we do that.
14:03 Well we can make that commitment now
14:07 to try and do it, yeah let's do it
14:08 to the viewers so you can have to confident
14:10 and find out if Caleb ever got to go
14:12 to Kitty Hawk. You know that would be
14:15 a dream for him, it would be
14:16 I will be interested in that as well and for you,
14:18 and for me because I was back in the hang
14:20 gliding boat but you know,
14:21 if we're going to trying,
14:24 well we gain ahead of ourselves it's,
14:26 it's about fulfilling dreams,
14:27 this is purely about finding out
14:30 what are some of their dreams.
14:31 What some of things that when
14:34 you were a kid, did your parents ever
14:37 fulfill any of your dreams, oh yeah.
14:40 Is it memorable to what did they do
14:42 in your heart. Well I can remember
14:45 my parents were of course
14:47 I was raised in England,
14:48 my parents weren't very wealthy and,
14:50 was England a poor country?
14:52 No, no, not really but you know
14:56 we just grow in the country,
14:57 we're country kids and I used to love
15:01 to watch to birds I didn't have a binoculars
15:03 I tried my brother's telescope
15:05 and it was pretty hard to kind of focusing
15:06 on that and so my father didn't have a lot of
15:08 money but he managed to get a hold of a used pair
15:13 of binoculars on one Christmas time
15:14 that's what I had for Christmas
15:16 and I was so excited.
15:18 So, you are excited,
15:20 I mean every child is excited
15:24 to receive a gift but how did it
15:25 affect you in your relationship
15:27 to your parents? Well anything like that
15:30 connects you to your parents,
15:32 you feel like they, they care about you know
15:35 they do even when they can't do this
15:37 things but you feel like they care about you,
15:39 that they're tuned into well make you tick
15:43 and what makes you happy and they've,
15:46 they've gone out of their way to try
15:47 and achieve that. So if, if it was a pair
15:51 of a binoculars you wanted obviously
15:53 your parents pick that up but what if they
15:55 brought home some telescope
15:58 and a book about the Night Sky
16:00 which maybe wasn't your dream,
16:02 how, how would that affect you?
16:04 Well I would given it to my brother
16:06 because that was his thing.
16:08 So that wouldn't have the same affect,
16:10 no, no because it would have missed the mark.
16:12 It was like the fact that they had
16:14 heard and realized what it was meant a lot to me
16:17 and did their very best to fulfill that.
16:19 That's the key that I really wanna bring
16:22 into ours viewers that in Carolyn's case
16:25 with those binoculars it was because her parents,
16:28 they perceived what was really in her heart,
16:31 maybe she just said that right,
16:33 but when we give intelligently
16:36 and often times you know I'm gonna be
16:39 honest gifts aren't my thing you,
16:41 you learn more about the fact the gifts
16:43 are Carolyn's thing, but gifts aren't my thing.
16:44 So, when it comes to buying gifts
16:46 it can be something like this hey
16:49 it's children's birthday is coming up
16:51 need to get him something,
16:52 so you go down the store
16:53 and what about this, what about that,
16:55 yeah that'll do, let's just get them that,
16:57 in the car, done, throw away,
17:00 that's it. Well I've at least something
17:01 for their birthday or Christmas or whatever.
17:03 How much thought really goes into it,
17:06 so we wanna challenge you to discover
17:09 their dreams and now I wanna talk a little bit
17:11 about something that really stands out
17:13 in my childhood. And no, I didn't expect that,
17:17 I almost felt a little bit of,
17:18 I did feel some emotion coming up in me,
17:20 so obviously it's deep down in there,
17:23 but I was born and raised in the
17:26 United Kingdom and I suppose in the US.
17:30 What do US kids do? They play basketball
17:34 or baseball or something but in the United Kingdom
17:37 every boy plays soccer and in fact
17:40 we don't call it soccer, we call it football,
17:42 but you American audience would
17:44 understand it as soccer.
17:45 And so I would play in the streets
17:49 in the evening, I played for the school,
17:51 I had a Sunday league team
17:52 that I played for and I didn't realize
17:56 that at the time but how committed my,
17:59 how committed this just goes to prove
18:07 that point. Definitely,
18:09 how committed my parents were to carry me
18:16 around and, excuse me.
18:19 It all culminated, I used to go
18:24 and watch as well as play the soccer,
18:27 because we use to love to go
18:28 and watch the soccer and it was always
18:31 on Saturday afternoon and my parents,
18:36 this isn't going away,
18:38 they are with me, they are with me.
18:41 My parents actually one that
18:43 I remember ready push the boat out
18:44 and their bought a season ticket
18:48 and that mean we could go and watch
18:51 the soccer every Saturday afternoon
18:53 for the whole season.
18:54 We didn't have to nag mom and dad,
18:56 can we go this week, can we go this week.
18:58 Oh they're pretty smart.
18:59 Yeah, we're gonna go every week
19:01 and well every other week or sometime
19:03 our team was playing away
19:04 and the end of the year that was
19:08 one of the soccer players
19:09 and he was going to be retiring,
19:12 yeah they retire them off at 25 or 35
19:15 or whatever and so he was gonna have this
19:17 special game where the,
19:18 the audience that came all the money
19:21 that was collected for the game
19:23 would go to him as his kind of retirement
19:27 gift from the football club,
19:28 this is professional soccer in the
19:30 United Kingdom. And so I was part of a Sunday
19:34 league team and we were having in this competition
19:37 going backwards and forwards and we ended up
19:41 in the final, my team we were the Coventry
19:44 sportsmen, I think that was the name
19:45 of our soccer team we ended up in the final
19:48 and the final of this match was gonna be
19:51 played on the professional field
19:54 with all the floodlights and about 6000 people
19:58 watching, yeah it's and so this was a dream
20:00 come true it was, it was on the 11 a side
20:03 it was down to seven a side
20:04 and so I didn't know if I was gonna be
20:06 in the team but I was I was in the team
20:08 and this is where it gets
20:10 really exciting for me I still remember
20:12 to this day we were wining
20:14 and I was in defense that's normally
20:17 at the back, but somehow I end up near
20:19 the goal and I scored a goal right there
20:23 in front of 6000 people.
20:24 I mean that's not very many,
20:26 but when you I was probably about
20:28 Caleb's age. I was about 11 or 12,
20:30 that is a big thing and then I looked up
20:32 at the huge great big scoreboard
20:34 and there's my name and I remember thinking
20:36 how do they know my name and you know
20:39 that was I don't play much soccer now.
20:43 I play with Caleb a little bit around the yard and,
20:45 and with you and Hannah but it's more
20:47 not competitive if I do it now,
20:49 but you know then I appreciated the fact
20:53 that my parents were willing to ferry me
20:56 here and ferry me there that made a big impact
20:59 on me and they obviously I,
21:01 in fact I've spoken to my dad
21:02 since on the subject and he said you know
21:06 Paul again and again he said you
21:09 lacked a lot of confidence as a child,
21:12 you were bottom of the class when it's came
21:14 to reading and spelling then all of that
21:16 and we recognized that you needed something
21:19 to give you some encouragement
21:21 and so they figured I was pretty good
21:24 at soccer obviously and so they were
21:27 willing to ferry me around for that and so.
21:29 Well I think that, that Caleb is into mechanical
21:33 things and I think letting him use
21:35 the tractor and do that you can see in him
21:38 I still remember the day he came home
21:40 from having driven to the neighbors
21:41 by the way moms, I was praying the whole
21:44 time he was going thinking anything
21:45 could happen to this child we leave up
21:47 in the mountains of Montana
21:48 with bears and mountain lines and moose,
21:50 you name it, but he came back
21:53 you could see his smile a long way
21:56 in the distance of, and he was coming back,
21:58 he was so excited that he'd gone to do this.
22:01 So we need to be prayerful about these dreams
22:05 that our children have, maybe their dreams
22:07 so we're just like how was that a big deal
22:08 about that, that really doesn't mean anything
22:10 that important to me, but listen to what
22:13 Paul's sharing about his dream by then.
22:15 It's always very important your 40
22:17 some now and you haven't forgotten it.
22:19 Yeah, and still very deep and so parents,
22:23 the challenge is, be observant,
22:27 this is another step to figure out,
22:30 you gonna have to do some questioning
22:32 and it might be a little bit awkward in a way,
22:36 but you need to be asking your children
22:38 so you know what kind of dreams do you have,
22:40 what kind of things do you enjoy.
22:42 And here again we're just paving the way,
22:45 because later on in our later program,
22:48 we're gonna be looking at ways
22:50 to fulfill that dream,
22:52 we've made a commitment here on TV
22:54 that we are gonna trying get to Kitty Hawk,
22:57 we're gonna use the way trial
22:59 or we're gonna say yes.
23:00 No one would go, but don't tell Caleb
23:01 because he doesn't know about it,
23:03 you know I have a question and that is,
23:06 what if as we dig deep into our children hearts
23:11 and find out what their dreams are,
23:13 what do we do if the dream
23:16 just isn't appropriate?
23:17 That's a good question,
23:19 because you know,
23:20 they need to be steered as children
23:23 to figure out what dreams are okay,
23:25 what dreams wouldn't be okay.
23:26 Right, and we wouldn't have things
23:28 in life they we regret that we wish
23:30 we hadn't done. Yeah, so what,
23:32 what we do something like come up
23:33 with this word. Well I think,
23:34 that's why God gave children parents they,
23:38 they need the guidance and as parents
23:40 we shouldn't be afraid to,
23:42 to guide our children and if they're wantings
23:45 something that's not gonna do them
23:48 any good in the long run then lovingly
23:50 we need to deny that or we need to seek
23:54 to divert their attention on to
23:56 something more profitable.
23:57 So you know if you are,
23:59 I can't think of an example necessarily,
24:02 but if your child when you investigate
24:04 what kind of dreams they have, has,
24:06 something just out there and you think,
24:08 you know that is not gonna do them
24:10 any good make sure first will you pray about that,
24:13 but if it really is one of those things
24:16 it's gonna take them of track then
24:17 you know look first something else,
24:19 look for something better because
24:21 we don't want this to take our children off
24:24 in a wrong direction. We are just wanting
24:26 to do what I said that in Malachi chapter 4
24:31 and verse 6. We want God to turn our hearts
24:35 to our children to reach them
24:38 in an affective way, that they will then be
24:41 drawn out to us as their parents because
24:44 in later programs we are gonna be talking about
24:47 some other thing we want our children
24:50 to do and it's gonna be lot easy if they,
24:53 they if we have won their affection,
24:56 which is the whole point of this first section
24:59 in Happy the Home, the first 13 programs
25:01 are all dedicated and I hope you're starting
25:03 to get a bit of a picture now
25:05 how we need to drove their affections in,
25:07 by denying ourselves by not doing
25:10 some of those things that are necessarily
25:11 comfortable for us. Well we'll comeback
25:15 after the break and we'll talk
25:17 very specifically about today's challenge,
25:20 join us in a few moments.