Participants: J.D. Quinn (Host), Tom Shepherd
Series Code: HPOV
Program Code: HPOV000032A
00:16 Welcome to Heaven's Point of View.
00:17 My name is J.D. Quinn. 00:19 We are working on a series that is really enlightening, 00:23 love, marriage, sex and divorce according to the New Testament. 00:27 Our host, our speaker, 00:30 the one that's making this all come together 00:33 is Dr. Tom Shepherd and we welcome you, Dr. Tom. 00:36 Thank you. Thank you. 00:38 What we've been talking about, 00:39 we've been talking about the husbands and the wives 00:42 and their positions and everything. 00:44 Now in Christian marriages where are we now? 00:49 So we've been talking about Ephesians 5, 00:52 this is our last discussion of Ephesians 5 in this series 00:56 and we're in the section talking about the husbands. 00:59 So we're gonna look, 01:01 we've already looked at verses 25, 26, and 27. 01:06 The section on the husbands 01:07 goes from verse 25 through verse 33. 01:11 We worked talking about verses 25 to 27 last time 01:16 so we're gonna go on from there 01:19 and read some more about the rest of it. 01:22 So we are gonna start with verse 28? 01:25 We will. We will. 01:26 Now Paul has been talking about the church 01:28 almost to the point where people get the idea like, 01:31 "Oh, well, has he forgotten 01:34 to talk about Christian marriage?" 01:36 But no, actually the passage is, 01:41 has a lot to say about the church, 01:43 but Paul is still discussing Christian marriage. 01:45 So just like he illustrated talking to wives 01:48 and used Christ as a paradigm there, 01:51 so now he holds that up for the husband. 01:54 Okay, so where are we going from here 01:58 dealing with the Christian marriage? 02:00 All right, so we're gonna start in verse-- 02:03 Well, you know, I don't think 02:05 it hurts to read the whole passage again 02:06 because people may not have-- It's been a while 02:09 since they saw the previous program 02:11 and if we put, read the whole passage, 02:12 we get the context. 02:14 It's Ephesians 5:25-33. Okay. 02:17 And I'll read through this pretty fast 02:19 because I know that we got a lot to cover up. 02:20 It's true. We got lot this time. 02:22 "Husbands, love your wives, 02:23 just as Christ also loved the church 02:25 and gave Himself for her, 02:27 that He might sanctify and cleanse her 02:29 with the washing of water by the word, 02:31 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, 02:35 not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, 02:38 but that she should be holy and without blemish. 02:40 So husbands ought to love their own wives 02:43 as their own bodies; 02:44 he who loves his wife also loves himself. 02:47 For no one ever hated his own flesh, 02:49 but nourishes and cherishes it, 02:51 just as the Lord does the church. 02:53 For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. 02:57 And 'For this reason 02:58 a man shall leave his father and mother 02:59 and be joined to his wife, 03:01 and the two shall become one flesh.' 03:03 This is the great mystery," or a great mystery 03:07 "but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 03:09 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular 03:12 so love his own wife as himself, 03:14 and let the wife see that she respects her husband." 03:17 Okay. Wow. 03:19 Beautiful passage. It is. 03:20 Beautiful passage and we are thinking now 03:22 of the love 03:24 that husbands are to show towards their wives. 03:27 We know that last time we said, you know, Paul said 03:31 that the wife would submit to their husbands 03:34 and so you might get the idea that Paul would say it, 03:36 and husbands, rule your wives, you know. 03:39 But that's not what he says. No. 03:40 He says, you are supposed to love your wives 03:43 and in case you didn't know how that was supposed to be, 03:46 it was as Christ loved the church 03:49 and gave Himself. 03:50 Let's say, giving sacrificial kind of love that He has. 03:55 The results that this has in for Christ in the church 03:59 is a sanctified church, 04:01 the waters of baptism set us apart 04:04 and then he wants to present us to Christ glorious 04:07 without spot or wrinkle holy and blameless. 04:10 So it's a process of us becoming more like Jesus. 04:14 So that's the sacrificial type? Yeah. 04:16 That's a sacrificial kind of love 04:18 that husbands are to have for the wives 04:20 and you think about it, 04:21 when you sacrifice for your family in this way, 04:24 they really take note of it 04:25 and it has an impact how they think about you. 04:30 But then he switches and in verse 28 he says, 04:36 "In the same way, 04:37 husbands should love their wives 04:40 as their own bodies. 04:42 He who loves his wife loves himself, 04:45 for no one ever hated his own flesh, 04:47 but nourishes and cherishes it, 04:50 just as Christ does the church." 04:54 This is a different kind of love. 04:55 Now we are going to a nurturing type. 04:57 Yes, it's a nurturing type of love 04:59 that Paul uses the terminology, you don't hate your own body, 05:03 you cherish it, you take care of it. 05:07 It is that which takes care of the other 05:08 because of the inherent linkage between them. 05:11 So he is talking about the unity of marriage. 05:16 Paul puts it simply, 05:17 he who loves his own wife loves himself. 05:22 He who loves his own wife loves himself. 05:25 It seems to me it's important to talk well of your spouse 05:30 to other people. 05:32 I know that it's-- 05:33 that's real easy in our relationship 05:35 with Shelley and I. 05:36 We go out-- 05:38 It's a nice testimony. Well, it is. 05:39 It is a testimony and the thing that I have found 05:44 is that I love Shelley very much. 05:47 I adore Shelley. 05:48 Now she is my wife I think that I'm very blessed. 05:51 But in this situation, 05:53 I've always liked her more than anything. 05:56 And so, you know, here you're kind of saying. 05:58 So consequently it's kind of like, 06:00 it just comes natural 06:02 that if I speak well of her, then she reciprocates. 06:06 That's right. 06:07 Now I have a practice that I do when I go out 06:10 on my morning walk or morning run, 06:13 I start thanking God for people and I start with my wife. 06:16 Amen. Amen. 06:18 And I thank her for God for different things about her 06:20 and then I go through a series of other people. 06:22 I thank God for all my colleagues 06:25 that I work with, you know, and staff and the secretaries 06:29 and I'll pray for them too. 06:31 I'm out there, you know, walking along 06:32 and this morning actually when I was out for my run, 06:36 I thought of 3ABN. 06:37 Amen. Amen. 06:39 And, you know, I think thankfulness 06:41 just builds in you a certain aspect of joy. 06:45 You just feel happier and to me-- Yeah, go ahead. 06:49 And I'm assuming that being thankful 06:52 is a first cousin to nurturing. 06:54 Yeah. Yeah. 06:55 Because when you're thankful for somebody, 06:57 you are positive about that. 06:59 So it's easier for you to think of how you can care for them. 07:01 Yeah. 07:03 In homes, I think sometimes what happens 07:05 people start to get into, you know, 07:06 when you first meet somebody, when they first fall in love 07:09 or when they're first dating and everything, it's all rosy. 07:12 And then when you get married you find out, 07:15 oh, this person has some faults. 07:16 Yes. 07:18 And guess what, they find out that, 07:19 oh, you have some faults too. 07:21 If you focus on the faults, then things start to go down. 07:25 It starts eroding in a hurry. Yeah. 07:27 But if you focus on that which is good, 07:29 you know, I'm so thankful. 07:30 In fact if you tell them, I'm so thankful 07:32 you're such a good cook, you know, 07:34 or you like to keep nice clean house 07:37 and we appreciate that. 07:38 If you actually tell them the expression of it 07:43 just helps to deepen the sense of appreciation 07:46 and builds more the same kind of characteristic, 07:49 you know, be shown to. 07:50 Most certainly. Most certainly. 07:52 And it just seems to me, I guess it's common sense. 07:54 Goes back to what you were saying 07:56 the practicality that Paul brings 07:58 into his message and so-- 08:01 So this parallel, you know, when Paul says 08:06 that you love your wife like you love yourself. 08:09 It's parallel to Christ concerned for the church. 08:12 He says, for we are members of His body. 08:13 Christ cares for us. Why? 08:15 Because we are His body. Amen. 08:17 So when the husband cares for his wife 08:19 "He who loves his own wife loves himself." 08:23 Thus the basis of the sacrificial love 08:25 is the example of Christ 08:26 in giving himself for the church. 08:29 And the basis of the nurturing love 08:31 is the unity that exists in our own body 08:34 and in Christ love for the church. 08:36 So you have both of these kinds of love 08:38 sacrificial and nurturing love. 08:40 Now this is rather interesting because these two kinds of love 08:44 kind of go with two different characteristics. 08:48 You know, self sacrificing love. 08:49 When you think of making self sacrifice, 08:52 you think of like a soldier out in the front lines. 08:54 He runs out and takes care of his buddies. 08:57 Well, everybody looks at him and says-- 08:59 Wow, he is courageous. 09:01 That man is courageous, you know. 09:02 He really cares for his buddies. 09:04 He is taking care of them. 09:06 On the other side nurturing love, 09:09 you think more in terms of gentleness 09:13 and these two characteristics are-- 09:16 There is little tension between them in a way, 09:18 I mean, they are kind of two different ways 09:20 of thinking or doing. 09:22 I think probably most men have an easier time 09:27 with the courageous aspect. 09:29 There's something in the man that wants to protect, 09:31 that wants to guard and to defend his family. 09:35 And when he doesn't have that opportunity, 09:37 when he is not offered that opportunity 09:39 there's, you sort of lose something 09:40 of his manliness. 09:42 He wants to be able to do that. Yeah. 09:43 But most of us probably need to find, 09:47 we need to focus more 09:49 probably on the nurturing side of this of. 09:51 You know, we need to be able to show people 09:54 that, to show our families and express to them 09:57 a nurturing caring kind of love as well. 09:59 Even if it takes us out of our comfort zone, 10:02 the more that you practice the better, the easier it is. 10:07 That's right. Right. 10:08 And the more you express it the more you, 10:11 you know, sometimes 10:12 we will have to say things that we may not always feel, 10:16 but you are saying because they are right 10:18 and the right to do and you-- Very well put. 10:20 You put expressions there and you practice, 10:25 you practice Christian love. 10:27 And then you become a more loving person. 10:30 I mean, I know over-- 10:32 That's about as biblical as you get. 10:33 You know, over the 40 years I've been married 10:35 that I have had to learn to be more patient, 10:38 I had to learn to say things in different ways 10:40 and the Lord keeps working with me 10:43 and my wife keeps patiently being with me. 10:47 Amen. 10:48 I know exactly what you are saying 10:49 and thank You, Jesus, that they are patient. 10:54 Yeah, now, verse 29 has this interesting truism. 10:57 He says, "For no one ever hated his own flesh, 11:00 but nourishes it and cherishes it, 11:02 just as Christ does the church." 11:05 Paul is using here a what we might call a truism. 11:10 It's to describe how we take care of ourselves. 11:14 Now we know that sometimes people become discouraged, 11:18 they become depressed 11:20 and they don't feel like taking care of themselves 11:22 and sometimes they don't. 11:24 Paul is not denying such behavior 11:26 rather he is describing what is generally true. 11:30 You know, it's just generally true 11:32 that people take care of themselves. 11:34 And so this becomes the basis for talking about 11:37 caring for your spouse and marriage 11:39 because your spouse is one with you. 11:42 It's a fool who talks bad of his spouse. 11:45 Because-- 11:47 you just point the finger back at yourself really. 11:48 You are the one that chose this person. 11:50 You know, so you really ought to speak well of them 11:53 and that speaks well of your choice. 11:55 Yes. You know. 11:56 And sometimes if you get off to a bad start, 12:00 then this goes back into what you were saying earlier, 12:02 maybe you need to practice some skills, some life skills 12:06 and then you'll reciprocate, you know, that feeling. 12:11 And you know, most of us we learn our life skills, 12:15 we learn about what is normal in the home, 12:19 in our own homes when we were children. 12:22 And if our own homes 12:23 were not the loving Christian homes 12:25 that they should be. 12:27 We don't know that the right way. 12:30 We don't know the Christian way. 12:31 This is why the church must take time to educate. 12:34 We must have relationship between people 12:36 and maybe sometimes even people saying, 12:38 "Oh, is that you are in another home 12:40 and you see how a husband treats the wife or something. 12:43 I remember we were missionaries 12:45 I think I mentioned to you, we were missionaries in Brazil 12:48 and one Sabbath I was there 12:51 and there was this visiting professor from Argentina 12:54 and he was sitting there, 12:57 after lunch we were talking little bit 12:59 and I said to him, 13:01 I said, "Do you believe in women's liberation?" 13:04 And he probably didn't know anywhere 13:06 where I was going with this, you know, and he was, 13:08 he probably didn't want to offend me or anything 13:10 and he kept kind of serious look on his face 13:13 and he said, "Oh, yes there is, there is." 13:15 As he was very conservative guy if I would call. 13:17 He looked at me and he said, well, there, 13:19 there are certain aspects of that that I agree with. 13:23 I said, well, good, let's you and I go wash the dishes 13:25 and let women just sit here and talk. 13:29 Amen. 13:31 So, you know... He probably, oh, is that? 13:34 Is that what you are gonna try, that's what you want to do? 13:37 Yeah, you know, 13:38 we need to do things for our wives. 13:40 Just a lot of, you know, a lot of homes the wife does 13:42 like all the house work and things. 13:44 You know, they shouldn't be. 13:45 We husbands should be in there, we should be working, 13:47 we should be supporting them, 13:49 letting them sit and rest a bit. 13:50 Yes. 13:52 It's very positive. 13:53 That something that, 13:54 that I certainly need to work harder on. 13:57 Well, some thing, as we mentioned a while ago, 14:00 some things come easier than others. 14:01 My wife and I have become a team when we are, 14:04 when we are washing, 14:05 when we are cleaning up after meal. 14:07 Amen. 14:08 I'm the one who washes the dishes 14:09 and puts them in the dishwasher. 14:11 We've discovered that, 14:12 actually if we run washes dishes in the dishwasher 14:13 we don't get cold as much 'cause- 14:16 Yes. 14:17 So I'm the one washing them off, 14:19 putting in the dishwasher and she puts the food away. 14:20 So we kind of a nice team. Well, that's fair. 14:22 We kind of do this back and forth kind of a thing. 14:25 All right, so-- 14:26 And you are the guy that takes for 25, 26, 27 someday you go, 14:32 you live long enough, 14:33 you could buy out the whole store of roses 14:35 on your anniversary. 14:37 I think that's the neat story. 14:38 Well, that, you know, to see what happened is that 14:41 she is actually become a little allergic to roses 14:43 so I don't get her roses. 14:45 Well, thank you, Jesus. 14:47 But she still, you know, 14:51 we are still going together there 14:52 and she is getting much sweeter. 14:54 That's right. 14:55 So there's really a-- 14:57 you are gonna say something. 14:59 Yeah, you had mentioned earlier 15:01 that there is a big surprise in here. 15:03 There is actually. 15:05 Yes, and I'm anxious to see 15:06 what we are talking about the surprise. 15:08 Yeah, so when Paul talks, here's the thing. 15:12 When Paul talks to the wives, you know, 15:15 if you go back to the wives you see he says, 15:17 "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord." 15:20 that's instruction to them. 15:21 "For the husband is the head of the wife, 15:24 even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, 15:27 and is himself its Savior." 15:28 Okay, so when he talks to the wives, 15:32 the reason he gives is he talks about the husband, 15:36 all right. 15:37 When he gets over to the husbands, he says, 15:39 husbands love your wives. 15:40 Okay. 15:42 So, now he is giving instructions to husbands. 15:43 Yeah. And talking directly to them. 15:44 As Christ love the church and gave Himself up for her. 15:49 The surprising thing is 15:51 that when he talks to the wives, 15:54 the focus is on something that relates to the husbands. 15:58 Yes. 16:00 And when he talks to the husbands, 16:02 the focus is on something that relates to the wives. 16:06 The idea is that your life, your married life, 16:11 your married experience as a Christian 16:14 is not supposed to focus on you. 16:17 Yes. 16:19 It's supposed to focus on your spouse. 16:23 Blessing and uplifting and honoring them. 16:26 Yes. 16:27 You know, unfortunate in our world today, 16:29 there is lots of turmoil 16:32 and I have a hard time 16:33 understanding people like terrorists 16:35 and people that are fighting and, 16:37 you know, just doing all these things. 16:39 And I think somebody one time said to me, 16:42 "Well, Tom, the reason you think that way 16:46 is because you are Christian. 16:48 You get up in the morning and you look in the mirror 16:50 and you say, whom can I bless today? 16:53 Whom can I help today?" 16:54 I tell you what, 16:56 I get no greater joy than helping somebody else. 16:59 I'm this PhD director, what's my day involved? 17:02 Students coming into my office with the problems 17:05 that they are facing. 17:06 It's this class or this problem or this deal, you know. 17:09 I just love to help solve the, you know, 17:11 open the door for them 17:12 so kind of solve the problem and, 17:14 you know, figure something out. 17:16 That's a great joy to me. It's a great joy. 17:18 Whereas these other people, they get up in the morning 17:20 and they say, "Who can I hurt? 17:22 How can I aim? Who can I blow up?" 17:24 That is sin. 17:25 As a Christian that is so foreign. 17:27 Yeah, it's so foreign. 17:28 So, you know, our job, our role as Christians 17:31 and particularly in the Christian family 17:34 is to bless and encourage. 17:36 Now when you think about it, 17:37 if you have a self sacrificing husband 17:41 who is focusing on blessing his wife, 17:44 is that a hard person to submit to? 17:46 No. 17:48 And if you think about a wife who submits, who is-- 17:52 I mean, it's not like she is a doormat or anything 17:54 but she listens to you, you listen to her 17:58 and you're gonna is that a hard person to help? 18:00 No. No. 18:01 So Paul in both of these cases 18:04 points out the importance of our need 18:07 to think of the other person. 18:09 And that takes away some of the sting 18:11 that some people get with this idea of submission. 18:13 They are like, oh, that's so controlling. 18:16 That's so, you know, you are in charge. 18:19 Jesus said, that's what the gentiles do. 18:22 That's what the gentiles do, He says, but not so with you, 18:25 but whoever wants to be 18:26 your master must be your servant. 18:28 Amen. Must serve you. 18:29 Because the Son of Man 18:31 did not come to be served but to serve 18:33 and to give His life as a ransom 18:35 to so many, for many. 18:36 The life of Jesus is the great paradigm for our homes. 18:41 It's really interesting because 18:43 I was thinking about this the other day. 18:44 I have a brother and I have a sister and myself 18:46 and we are all giving people. 18:49 I mean, we all want to go out our way to help. 18:52 So I don't know if my father and my mother 18:56 I was fortunate enough to, you know, 18:59 for them to remain married. 19:02 I don't know if they had a plan or not, you know, 19:06 but I do know that out of three kids, 19:09 you have three servants. 19:10 Nice. 19:11 So something was done right. 19:13 Something was right. Yeah. Yeah. 19:14 And you know, I've just versus-- 19:16 I do know that personality 19:18 where it's more about themselves 19:20 and what can I get. 19:21 Well, can you, could you run the store? 19:24 Man, it's kind of like I've already picked the keys 19:26 and already gone, you know, versus, well, 19:30 what we are paying for gas to go do it. 19:33 You know, I mean there is just 19:35 a difference in mentality there, you know, 19:37 and it just seems like that's a blessing. 19:40 I remember one of the greatest gifts-- 19:44 See my wife is a medical doctor. 19:45 She is now retired because of health issues 19:48 but she practiced medicine for a number of years. 19:51 But I remember one of the greatest gifts 19:54 that I believe that my wife ever gave to our family 19:57 was for the first five years of my daughter's life, 20:02 we have two kids little boy and girl. 20:04 The girl is older. 20:05 But the first five years of that little girl's life 20:07 she stayed home 20:10 and was taking care of this little, 20:12 this little children and helping them 20:15 and I still see that the results of that 20:19 in the lives of my children today, 20:20 both are still in the church. 20:22 My daughter and her husband are both teachers down at, 20:25 down at Keene, 20:26 down at Southwestern Adventist University biology department. 20:30 And my son, he is in accounting work 20:33 and he has little children. 20:35 We have these little grandchildren running around, 20:37 so you know, it's a great joy. 20:40 So good seed were planted? 20:41 Good seed were planted 20:43 and we are thankful that they sprouted up. 20:45 This really brings us to verse 31. 20:46 I wonder if you read that for us again. 20:48 Thirty one. Verse 31. 20:50 Yes. Yes. 20:51 "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother 20:54 and be joined to his wife, 20:55 and the two shall become one flesh." 20:58 It's fantastic. 20:59 So I'm interested to see 21:00 how you're gonna handle to that. 21:02 Yes, now this is actually a quote from the Old Testament 21:05 and he is quoting from the Book of Genesis 2:24. 21:09 So I want to turn over to Genesis 21:10 and read that passage, 21:12 Genesis 2 verse 20, 21:16 Genesis 2:18-25. 21:22 Genesis 2:18-25. 21:27 "And the Lord God said, 21:29 'It is not good that man should be alone, 21:31 I will make him a helper comparable to him.' 21:34 Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field 21:37 and every bird of the air, 21:38 and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. 21:42 And whatever Adam called each living creature, 21:44 that was its name. 21:46 So Adam gave names to all cattle, 21:48 to the birds of the air, 21:50 and to every beast of the field. 21:51 But for Adam he was not found a helper comparable to him. 21:56 And the Lord God 21:58 caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, 22:00 and he slept, and He took one of his ribs," 22:03 It's with the capital H "Took one of his rips 22:05 and closed up the flesh in its place. 22:09 Then the rib in which the Lord God had taken from man 22:12 He made into a woman, 22:14 and He brought her to the man. 22:16 And Adam said, 22:18 'This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh. 22:21 She shall be called Woman, 22:23 because she was taken out of Man.' 22:25 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother 22:28 and be joined to his wife, 22:30 and they shall become one flesh. 22:33 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, 22:36 and were not ashamed." 22:38 Okay. Amen. 22:39 It's a very interesting story. 22:42 Verse 18 is where the story begins and it says, 22:44 ''It is not good for the man to be alone." 22:48 There are these two stories of creation, 22:50 Genesis 1 focuses especially on God's amazing power, 22:54 God the creator. 22:55 Genesis 2 focuses more attention on the people 22:58 and how God put them together. 23:02 Verse 18 of chapter 2 is the first time in the Bible 23:05 when we have something said, "It's not good." 23:07 "It's not good." Yeah, well. 23:08 In chapter 1 everything was good, 23:10 it was good, it was very good. 23:11 Now here's something that's not good, 23:13 "It's not good for the man to be alone." 23:15 So what's the next thing that God does? 23:19 God, He says, then we need to make it good." 23:23 We need to make it good. 23:25 We need to find you a mate, a helper. 23:27 Yeah, so what does he do? 23:30 See, we go back to the story. 23:32 Now this is the surprising thing. 23:33 So what does he do? 23:34 He brings him all the animals to name. 23:38 Okay. And that's kind of... 23:39 That's, that's... That's kind of odd. 23:42 You know, what he is trying to... 23:44 Yes, really. Yeah. 23:45 He is trying to match him up with the animals. 23:46 You know, this one-- oh, that's not good enough. 23:49 You know, this one, oh, that's not good. 23:50 This man is just too hard to set right. 23:51 No, not this one, then we go to. 23:53 Actually the-- it says and there was no, 23:57 there was no on found. 23:59 There was no creature found. 24:00 There was no suitable helper for him. 24:02 So suitable helper. Yeah. 24:03 Now lot of people will say, 24:04 oh, they came in twos 24:06 and he noticed that was male, female. 24:07 There is no burden for him. It doesn't say that. 24:08 No it doesn't. 24:10 The difference actually is not the difference of gender 24:12 but the difference of kind. 24:14 They are animals he is man. 24:16 And they are not like him 24:17 so they are not suitable for him. 24:19 They don't match him. 24:20 And so what God does is then He does the first anesthesia, 24:24 He does the first surgery 24:25 and He takes the rib from the man side 24:28 and He makes the woman and He brings it to the man. 24:30 And when she comes, she is brought, 24:33 she is brought to him then he has the first love poetry. 24:36 Yeah. Women love this type of stuff. 24:38 But he does the first poetry and he says, 24:40 "Now this is bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh, 24:43 shall be called Woman." 24:44 So what happened was God was creating a miracle 24:46 in this ancient world. 24:48 He was producing a sense of need in a perfect world. 24:52 So the man would sense his need of the woman. 24:55 And then the apostle, then Moses goes on to say 24:59 that the "Man leaves his father and mother, 25:00 he becomes joint to his wife, 25:03 they become one flesh and there is no shame." 25:06 There is these four steps. 25:07 Now we are kind of running short on time 25:09 so but we will kind of-- 25:10 Let's look at the four steps. 25:12 We will look at the four steps real quick. 25:13 Yes. All right. 25:15 First they leave, He leaves his family. 25:18 Now Israel was a patrilineal society, 25:21 so the man would not be the person who normally leave, 25:23 the woman would, 25:25 but he leaves and now he is joint to his wife 25:27 because it is a new home. 25:30 Ellen White puts it nicely 25:31 in the book Ministry of Healing, page 361. 25:34 "Around every family there is a sacred circle 25:37 that should be kept unbroken. 25:39 Within this circle no other person has a right to come. 25:42 Let not the husband or the wife 25:44 permit another to share the confidences 25:46 that belong solely to themselves. 25:48 Let each give love rather than exact it. 25:50 Cultivate that which is noblest in yourselves, 25:53 and be quick to recognize 25:54 the good qualities in each other. 25:56 The consciousness of being appreciated 25:58 is a wonderful stimulus and satisfaction. 26:00 Sympathy and respect encourage the striving after excellence, 26:04 and love itself increases as it stimulates to nobler aims." 26:09 That's beautiful. Beautiful passage. 26:10 So when it comes to being joined, 26:13 it's a sense of permanence 26:14 and of passion that they have for one another. 26:17 The idea of one flesh clearly has a linkage 26:20 to the concept of sexual relations 26:23 but the Old Testament uses the word "to know" 26:27 as a euphemism for sexual relations. 26:29 Adam knew his wife but it's more than just sex 26:32 that's involved here 26:34 because sex in its joy, in its permanence, 26:37 in its pleasure, and its intimacy 26:39 unites two people as nothing else can do. 26:42 You do something with everybody else 26:44 but there is only one thing 26:45 that you only do with your spouse 26:46 and that's sexual relation. 26:48 That's why it's so precious 26:49 and that's why the devil wants to destroy it. 26:52 Now verse 25 seems like an odd ending. 26:54 It says, they were both naked but they weren't ashamed. 26:57 But the idea here is the idea of innocence 27:03 and there was nothing shameful 27:05 about sex in that ancient world. 27:08 Well, that really brings us to the end of the verses 27:11 in verses 32 and 33 27:13 and we may be just read those real brief. 27:15 "This mystery is profound, 27:16 and I am saying that in terms of Christ and the church. 27:19 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, 27:21 and let the wife see that she respects her husband." 27:24 Paul summarizes all this. 27:25 Jesus is the pattern for the husband and wife. 27:28 As the wife submits to the Lord, 27:30 she is to submit to her husband. 27:32 As Christ loves the church and gave Himself for her, 27:37 so the husband is to love his wife 27:38 sacrificially and supportively. 27:41 Christian marriage is not 50-50 27:43 it's 100 percent, 100 percent. 27:44 Amen. Amen. 27:46 So that's a summary of Christian marriage. 27:49 Here again, Dr, Shepherd, we want to thank you so much 27:52 because this is, this is good stuff. 27:54 And in closing, I thank with this very sample. 27:57 "Jesus Christ is the pattern for the husband and wife." 28:01 Yes. You know. 28:02 So I thank you again for being with us today, 28:05 for spending this time with us. 28:07 God bless you. |
Revised 2016-03-10