Free Indeed

Indiana Women's Prison

Three Angels Broadcasting Network

Program transcript

Participants: C.A. Murray (Host), Lemuel Vega (Host), Shelley Quinn (Host), Carol Smith, Courtney Simpson, Jim Warthman, Kim, Tammy Atwood

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Series Code: FIN

Program Code: FIN000012


00:06 That is a sound that you just never
00:09 really get accustomed to and yet if you've got
00:13 to spend months or years here, it's a sound
00:17 that you've to get accustomed
00:18 to because it becomes the background noise,
00:20 the rhythm of your life. That sound wakes you up.
00:23 That sound puts you to bed.
00:25 That sound announces when you can go out
00:27 to meals or to the yard or when you have
00:29 to come back in and shut it down for the night.
00:32 That sound becomes the rhythm of your existence
00:37 for however long you're here.
00:40 On today's program, we are back
00:42 at the women's prison in Indiana.
00:45 Today, you're gonna meet Courtney, and Carol, and Kim
00:50 and you're gonna meet Tammy
00:52 and there's gonna be a very special message
00:54 from our own Shelley Quinn.
00:56 Courtney is one who's gonna talk about depression,
01:00 battling depression, battling circumstances
01:02 that she had no control over.
01:04 That's a message for you.
01:06 Carol has made good of her time in here.
01:10 She has worked. She is now a master chef.
01:12 In fact, she cooked for the crew
01:14 and I have it on good authority
01:15 that she applies her trade well.
01:17 She is a very, very good cook, there I say chef.
01:20 Tammy, the community worker
01:22 who got us in has a little something to say to you also.
01:26 And then Kim also has a strong message for us.
01:31 Lemuel Vega has a short interview.
01:32 So it's a very full program, a program
01:34 that has a lot to say to you, a program
01:36 that will encourage you as you stay
01:38 by for this edition of "Free Indeed."
01:57 Today we have Courtney Simpson with us.
01:59 Courtney, is this your first time in prison?
02:01 Yes, it is.
02:02 How long have you been in prison?
02:03 Three years. Three years.
02:04 How many years do you have remaining in prison?
02:07 I have 10 years left.
02:08 Okay, you are in prison
02:09 but something went wrong in this prison time of yours
02:12 and you are in maximum security, in a lockup facility?
02:16 Yes, what would you share a message of hope
02:18 with the world for those people
02:19 that are free by society standards
02:21 but yet they're locked up in that bondage?
02:24 Just step out-- outside of yourself
02:26 and let God step in.
02:27 Let Him--allow Him to take over whatever the situation is.
02:31 So He can carry you out with His hands and His ways.
02:35 He just--don't look for it in yourself
02:38 or no one else 'cause can nobody help you,
02:41 no one, just look to God,
02:43 He will be the one to care you, amen.
02:49 During that time in that little tiny segregation cell
02:54 somehow that hope begin to regenerate in your life.
02:57 Yes, would you share with me a moment about that in closing?
03:00 Well, the situation I was in lasted for about
03:03 seven or eight months and um, it went exactly
03:07 all the way locked but it was a situation
03:09 where you can-- you have no choice
03:11 but to remain calm and let God just guide you out.
03:15 Because without Him, I know I wouldn't have
03:17 been able to just come out here
03:19 and come and be able to find out about
03:22 more things like I still am today,
03:24 find out things about myself that I never knew possible.
03:29 I was very angry, very hard,
03:32 discouraged but through all that I let God just hold me.
03:37 God will hold you until He comes again.
03:40 Thank you, Courtney.
03:41 God has always been in my life.
03:46 I grew up in church but as a teenager
03:49 you still wanna go your own away
03:51 and find what's out there and be nosy.
03:54 And I was the one trying to find my own way
03:59 so-- I wasn't raised in a abusive home
04:05 so when I ended up in a abusive relationship,
04:09 it all came as a shock.
04:11 It came as a shock to my family.
04:16 The guy that I was so madly in love
04:18 with and held on to him,
04:23 he became abusive not only to me
04:26 but to my children. So one particular morning,
04:33 he struck my son
04:36 and the blow killed him.
04:39 And because I didn't leave him
04:44 as the State thought I should,
04:46 I was given a neglect charge.
04:50 When this happened,
04:52 I wanted to be mad at God, and I wanted to blame God,
04:56 why did you allow this to happen to my child?
04:58 He was so innocent.
05:01 And I always questionable Him
05:05 almost hateful but as I sat down,
05:10 he began to talk to me and told me,
05:12 "I'm not gonna leave you,
05:13 this is all make you stronger, this is all gonna workout."
05:17 So I just had to believe that and trust in God
05:20 and now that healed me and my family too.
05:24 We can even listen along with, by myself.
05:27 I have a 10-year-old son.
05:28 I have a 4-year-old daughter.
05:30 And I have a very strong family
05:31 who's still there for me today.
05:34 So I just have to be thankful for everything
05:37 that He's doing for me. Not even then,
05:40 even when I was going to, you know,
05:43 He stayed with me and I was just thanking
05:46 the little for the loving God and everything
05:49 that He's shown me has taught me
05:51 how to love people, not generally in just as a whole,
05:56 not just this about a person,
05:58 or that about a person or be one sided.
06:03 He's just awesome.
06:06 Holy and righteous is thy name, oh, Lord
06:14 Holy and righteous is thy name
06:19 Every knee shall bow and every tongue
06:26 Must confess that
06:29 Holy and righteous is thy name
06:35 You can snap your fingers, its okay.
06:37 King of kings and you're the Lord of lords
06:45 King of kings and the Lord of lords
06:52 The whole earth is full of thy glory
06:59 The whole earth is full of thy grace
07:07 The whole earth is full of thy mercy
07:15 Holy and righteous is thy name
07:22 Holy, and Thou are righteous
07:28 And You are holy, and Thou are righteous
07:35 You are Holy, and Thou are righteous
07:43 And You are Holy, and Thou are righteous
07:49 You are so Holy,
07:53 Thank you for being so righteous
07:57 You are, you are Holy,
08:01 Thank you for loving me, righteous
08:07 Holy and thank you for being so, righteous
08:14 Holy and righteous is thy name
08:19 Holy and righteous is thy name
08:27 Holy and righteous is thy name
08:34 Holy and righteous is thy name
08:42 Holy and righteous is thy name
08:49 Holy and righteous is thy name
08:56 Holy
09:05 In 1980, I got charged with a murder charge.
09:10 I came from a very Christian family,
09:13 when I was a kid.
09:15 I got married into a very, very abusive relationship.
09:20 I guess the last draw was when he threatened to kill me
09:24 and my kids, but
09:26 Everybody in here is not bad, we made a mistake
09:30 and you can go from whatever you do in here.
09:33 Since then, I have got my GED.
09:37 I have associate in food and management.
09:41 I've got a bachelors in humanities.
09:44 I have 18 years of culinary art at the old prison.
09:49 And I've got almost two here.
09:52 If it wasn't for God, I wouldn't have made it
09:54 because there was a lot of times
09:55 when I first came here with 80 years,
09:57 I didn't think I would ever see daylight.
10:00 It was very unreal to me
10:03 because I've never been in trouble.
10:04 I never had been arrested or anything.
10:08 So it was really hard and I started praying and asked
10:14 Him to give me the strength to make it and He has.
10:19 He has given me all the strength.
10:20 He's given me good jobs.
10:21 He's given me good bosses.
10:23 I mean, I couldn't--for a prison,
10:26 I couldn't ask for better.
10:28 and I know He's the one
10:29 that's put these people in my life.
10:33 In here I do feel like I'm free indeed.
10:36 It means to me that I'm free in my heart.
10:39 I may not be able to walk outside
10:42 but I'm free within me.
10:44 God has given me that freedom
10:46 and He's given me good friends, good family, good loved ones.
10:53 He's taken care of me.
10:56 Today we are at the Indiana Women's Prison
10:58 and we have Tammy Atwood with us
11:00 at the Indiana Women's Prison.
11:01 And Miss Atwood, what is your position here
11:03 at the Indiana Women's Prison?
11:04 I'm the community involvement coordinator here.
11:07 And what does that entail?
11:09 We work with the live different programs.
11:11 We have a lot of giveback in this institution.
11:14 We believe in giving back to the community
11:15 with different programs.
11:17 What kind of value or blessing does a lady receive
11:21 when she has the opportunity to volunteer
11:22 her time in prison to give back to society?
11:26 Self esteem, one of them.
11:28 When they walk out the store,
11:30 they know they've done a lot of good things
11:31 in this community that they are very much
11:33 a part of this community from all that they have done.
11:36 So even though they've been locked up for wrong,
11:37 when they leave, this gives them a sense of well being
11:40 and a sense of a connection when they go out.
11:42 Absolutely. Okay, well, Miss Atwood,
11:43 I thank you for being more than just
11:45 an employee of the Department of Corrections.
11:47 You go above and beyond
11:48 and we say thank you very much, very much.
11:50 Thank You, Lem. God bless you.
11:54 I would like to bring Sister Kim up here.
11:57 And Kim is somebody that's been in the same prison
12:00 with you all for sometime and God provided
12:03 that she could go from this prison house
12:06 to the free world but there's something really
12:08 unique about Kim is Kim has not forgotten her
12:12 sisters behind bars, so you're not forgotten.
12:15 There is hope in this time of need.
12:17 There is hope because God has opened the way
12:19 to where inmates can go back in to let you know
12:22 you're not forgotten.
12:23 Now we don't come today
12:25 half-stepping back into the prison.
12:27 Today we come and with all the zeal
12:29 and all the blessings that God has given us
12:32 because we want you to know that there is hope.
12:34 And Kim is one of your own
12:35 and Kim is here today to share
12:37 with you the Gospel message in a moment of time
12:41 to not give up and to not look back. Kim,
12:43 would you come up here please?
12:46 Would you just look at these ladies from the heart
12:49 that you once sat in these chairs,
12:51 and just let them now that as you are free now
12:53 by society standards,
12:55 that somewhere on this journey freedom started
12:57 while you were in here to encourage them.
12:59 I would be happy to.
13:00 And you said a very profile statement
13:03 as far as by society standards
13:05 because I was free in here, amen.
13:09 Because "Who the Son sets free, is free indeed."
13:14 And God set me free in 1991 December the 3rd,
13:18 3:30 PM, I'll never forget it.
13:21 So when I walked inside of these prison walls,
13:23 I was already free.
13:25 The chains had already fell off.
13:27 And I just decided not to look back once I got here.
13:33 But I was thinking about, you know,
13:34 what could I share today
13:37 and the Spirit gave me the scripture,
13:39 Jeremiah 29:11, that says,
13:42 "For I know the thoughts that I think towards you,
13:46 thoughts of good and not of evil to give you
13:48 hope for your future and an expected end."
13:52 So when I thought about, God had a plan for my life
13:57 and He said it's a good plan,
13:59 then I thought what am I doing here
14:02 if God has a good plan for my life.
14:05 And so I began to take the steps towards
14:08 being the person that God created me
14:10 to be from the foundation of the world
14:13 because life is really all about choices.
14:17 And I chose to be a Christian.
14:19 I choose to be free. Nobody is making me do it.
14:22 This is how I want to live
14:24 and I choose to come back in just to show you
14:28 that God can make a difference in your life
14:32 if you wanna be changed. And again John 8:36 says,
14:37 "Who the Son sets free, is free indeed."
14:39 These prison walls cannot keep God out, amen.
14:44 There is no bar that's been made
14:46 that can keep the Spirit of God from moving in your life,
14:50 if you want Him to move.
14:52 And I'm a witness that even being in here
14:55 and being an inmate, God still allowed me
14:59 to have the freedom because when the guards see
15:01 that you really do and all that you wanna be,
15:05 to be changed then they'll begin to give you
15:08 favor even inside these prison walls
15:11 when they see that you're really not playing games,
15:14 what you really wanna be about the business of the Lord
15:17 but again when you choose to be a Christian,
15:20 you choose to be like God.
15:23 Of course there's gonna be opposition
15:25 but there's opposition out in the world, amen.
15:28 There's opposition out there
15:30 but as long as you stay on that path,
15:32 as long as you stay on the path to holiness
15:34 and righteousness, I'm a witness
15:36 that your life will never ever, ever be the same.
15:40 Before I came here today,
15:42 I was over at the Juvenile Center,
15:43 we did a three-day retreat for the girls,
15:46 Grooming of the Queens Retreat
15:49 because it really starts right here.
15:51 The choices start right here
15:54 what am I gonna do with my life?
15:56 Because sin will take you further than you want to go.
15:59 It will keep you lower than you wanna stay
16:01 and it'll cost you more than
16:02 you ever thought you wanted to pay.
16:04 But there is a God who we serve--Amen.
16:08 That can make all the difference in your life.
16:11 That can open up doors that no man can shut.
16:14 And He can shut doors that no man can open.
16:16 Amen. Let me ask you a question.
16:23 What inspired you, you said that when you came here
16:26 the chains had already been set free
16:28 but yet you were coming to prison perhaps in shackles.
16:31 Where on this journey were you inspired or someone
16:33 directed your thoughts towards a different path?
16:36 I was in jail and I was facing
16:39 a 50-year sentence for dealing drugs.
16:42 And I got down on my knees.
16:44 Like yourself I had been
16:46 to some of the best treatment centers in the world.
16:49 None of them could set me free.
16:51 None of them could get me free
16:53 from that cocaine bondage that was--
16:55 had me gripped everyday.
16:56 I had a thousand dollar a day habit. Wow.
17:00 Nothing could set me free.
17:02 And, I mean, I went to some of the best hospitals in the world
17:05 'cause my husband had some of the best insurance.
17:08 But it was in that jail cell
17:10 when I looked around at that 2 x 4 cell
17:13 and I asked myself, how did you get here?
17:16 And I went down on my knees
17:18 and I asked the Lord to please,
17:21 Glory Halleluiah, I said, Lord,
17:25 if you could just come into my life and change me,
17:30 I promise, God, I will never ever,
17:34 ever look back and change me.
17:38 He did. He came into my heart, made the difference.
17:42 Yes, I got the time but I did not turn my back on God.
17:47 And in 2006, what man said say could not be done,
17:53 never been done before,
17:54 Never been done before, I was granted clemency
17:58 by the government of the State of Indiana, amen.
18:05 Now you said something, you said something that God
18:09 can set any of these people free that want to be free.
18:13 I believe in my heart that every woman
18:15 sitting in this auditorium today,
18:18 they want true freedom just like you,
18:20 even though you're in active addiction,
18:22 you sought help through these treatment facilities
18:25 and God just sometimes let's us go down
18:27 on our own way long enough to where we see,
18:29 we can't get no help but through Him. Amen.
18:32 So I believe that every one of these women want change,
18:34 what do you think? Right,
18:35 even when I was doing drugs,
18:37 Mr. Vega, there was something in me
18:39 that wanted to be free
18:41 but I didn't know how to be free.
18:44 I didn't know how to break that grip off of my life
18:48 but when I went down on my knees and I cried,
18:51 Lord, help me please. God heard my cry.
18:56 He reached way down and picked me up,
18:59 set my feet on a solid rock.
19:02 And my life has never been the same.
19:05 Amen. Sister, that's I agree 100%.
19:08 In closing, in closing, would you just look right out
19:11 there to the cameras and now you're no longer
19:13 talking to the inmates that are incarcerated,
19:15 you are talking to the world
19:16 that's still suffering in active addiction,
19:18 what would you share with them today?
19:21 I would have to go back to Jeremiah 29:11,
19:25 where God said, "For I know the thoughts
19:27 that I think towards you, thoughts of good
19:30 and not of evil to give you hope for your future
19:34 and to give you an expected end.
19:37 For God so love this world
19:39 that He gave His only begotten son
19:42 that who should ever believe in Him
19:44 will not perish but have everlasting life."
19:47 And verse 17 of John 3 says,
19:49 "For God came not into this world to condemn this world
19:53 but that the world through Him might be saved."
19:56 Amen, what is Jeremiah 29:13 say?
20:01 Jeremiah 29:13 says, "If you cry unto Me,
20:05 He said that He would hear you
20:07 and then He would answer you,
20:10 when you cry with your whole heart."
20:11 With your whole heart.
20:13 Sisters, that's what we got to do.
20:14 We can't come half stepping.
20:15 We gotta say, Lord, here I am, I want change,
20:18 please help me if You're really real.
20:20 And, sisters, he'll begin to transform us.
20:22 And jail house religion is not weak, amen.
20:25 You might see some gangster going over to the church,
20:28 give them a break because they too want
20:30 change just like you do, amen.
20:31 Sister, thank you very much. God bless you.
20:38 If only we could grasp the reality of this that God
20:42 is not asking you to lead a Christian life
20:45 to walk in obedience by your power.
20:49 God is saying, Come to Me and learn to rely on Me
20:54 and I will empower you to do these things.
20:58 Have you got a drug habit? I will empower you.
21:02 I will cut you free. Psalm 129 verse 4 says,
21:06 "I will cut you free
21:07 from the cord of the wicked that binds you."
21:10 God loves us perfectly. You are the apple of His eye.
21:16 He is the perfect father whose love is unfailing.
21:20 He is your provider,
21:21 your protector and your provision.
21:23 And the Bible says He will instruct you
21:25 with His eye upon you. His eye is always on you
21:30 and He will lead you and show you the way.
21:33 And as any good father will, God disciplines us.
21:38 And you know sometimes when I'm out I'll tell people,
21:40 I pray for God's discipline and people will go,
21:46 you hear a collective gasp around the audience
21:49 'cause it's like oh, I don't want
21:51 to pray for God's discipline.
21:53 You know what, He's gonna discipline us
21:55 one way or the other and as long
21:57 as we're praying for discipline Lord show us
22:02 His discipline is in love and in gentleness
22:05 and what He does is when we need to be disciplined,
22:08 He whispers into our ear. He says don't go that way,
22:12 don't go that way, child, that way leads to pain and sorrow,
22:16 please, don't go that way.
22:18 Sometimes we ignore Him and we just keep on going,
22:21 got a little attitude going on and then God will put
22:25 some kind of hindrance in our path to discipline us.
22:32 Lot of you are here because you're receiving
22:34 the discipline of God and you should be thankful for it.
22:38 Because you know what, our life on this earth,
22:41 if you look at the line of infinity from time--
22:44 before time began to where--
22:47 we can't even see the end of it.
22:49 If we had a long straight line out here,
22:51 life on earth would take up less than
22:53 an eighth of an inch.
22:56 What we're looking for is life eternal.
23:02 God, when trials and tribulations come our way,
23:07 He's there to comfort us, to walk us through,
23:11 to deliver us from times of trouble.
23:13 The Bible says when we're afflicted,
23:15 when we're in trouble and distress,
23:17 He is afflicted. He sees our tears
23:22 and this Book of Psalm says
23:23 He even collects them in His bottle.
23:26 Get this one, Zephaniah 3:17,
23:30 "The Lord your God in your midst.
23:33 The Mighty one will save,
23:36 He will rejoice over you with gladness.
23:40 He will quiet you with singing, quiet you with His love,
23:45 He will rejoice over you with singing."
23:49 Is that your picture of God?
23:51 Can you see him up there rejoicing
23:55 because you turn your heart to Him,
23:57 rejoicing because you make the right decision,
24:03 the right choice. God will never force you.
24:07 He knows our thoughts before we speak them.
24:09 He's watchful over our comings and goings.
24:12 He is aware of the smallest detail in our life.
24:16 The Bible even says he can number the hairs on your head
24:19 and He has had some-- I've had trouble
24:21 with my thyroid lately and He's having trouble
24:23 keeping up with how many hairs on my head
24:25 have fallen out.
24:27 But He says He will not forget us
24:30 because we are permanently tattooed on His palms.
24:34 Oh, no wonder John said in First John 3:1,
24:39 "Behold what manner of love
24:42 the Father has bestowed upon us,
24:44 that we should be called the children of God!"
24:48 It's difficult for us to comprehend this
24:52 but we are the king--
24:53 the children of the king of kings.
24:56 You are His princesses, God is love.
24:58 He is the very essence of love.
25:01 And by the grace of our relationship with Christ Jesus,
25:05 this gift of love is magnified
25:08 and manifested and the Bible tells us in Ephesians 1
25:11 that already He has blessed us with every Spiritual blessing.
25:17 If God was willing to sacrifice His son for us,
25:21 how could He not then freely do all things for us?
25:27 He invites you. He sends His Spirit into your heart
25:31 that you can cry out Abba, Father.
25:34 You know what Abba means?
25:37 Abba is a-- an Aramaic expression
25:40 and it's a very intimate word for father.
25:44 It means like papa, daddy.
25:47 God wants you to call on Him in such a way.
25:51 You are His child. You are His precious child.
25:58 Psalm 27:10 says, "When my father
26:00 and mother forsake me, the LORD will take care of me."
26:04 He's a father to the fathers.
26:07 He is a defender of the widows.
26:11 He sets the solitary in families.
26:14 He says "Fear not, for I am with you,
26:18 be not dismayed, for I am your God,
26:20 I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you,
26:25 I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
26:28 Let's say prayer. Heavenly Father,
26:33 we--everything that I had spoken,
26:36 Lord, I have taken from Your word and Your Bible says
26:40 that all of your promises are ours in Christ Jesus.
26:44 Father, we so little understand Your perfect love.
26:47 I ask in the name of Jesus that the things
26:51 that have been spoken today will penetrate
26:54 the hearts of my sisters.
26:56 I ask that You open our eyes
26:58 and take away this veil and help us to see
27:02 and to understand to some degree
27:05 how great Your love is.
27:07 And Father, pour out Your love into our hearts
27:10 that we may love You with all of our heart,
27:13 soul, mind and strength. In Jesus name, amen.
27:23 I would just like to thank everyone
27:25 that's here. We thank you
27:26 from just a handful of people
27:28 but to know that there are many more
27:30 that appreciate it that never get to see you
27:32 'cause these people are down.
27:33 Their freedom's been taken away.
27:35 They see their family once or twice a week.
27:38 They need something.
27:39 They need to know people care.
27:42 A lot of people think about them
27:44 but you can think about them all you want to
27:46 until you come in, you get involved
27:49 because they're not just put away and forgotten.
27:51 And I'm happy that the whole crew
27:53 could come here today and put this all together.
27:55 It's very important.
28:05 I would like to thank the administration
28:06 for bringing the program to us
28:08 because it brought quite a highlight to my life
28:10 and I will always remember it over everything
28:12 that I've experienced and that they need
28:14 to keep bringing it back for the other people,
28:17 I mean, when there was no hope,
28:18 they brought hope to us.


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Revised 2014-12-17