Participants: Cheri Peters (Host), Marcia Armstead
Series Code: CLR
Program Code: CLR00086B
00:14 Welcome back, we're going to continue our discussion
00:18 on rebellion so if anybody out there is feeling that we
00:21 might be talking about you, we might be talking about you.
00:25 I'm going to ask you because I look at you Marcia, I want
00:28 to say first of all thank you for being on the program.
00:31 Oh you are welcome, it's good to be here Cheri.
00:34 When I first talked to you, we were doing a whole other
00:37 thing, we were talking about me coming into Colorado
00:40 Springs to do an event and I was talking to you about
00:43 that and I had heard a little bit about your journey and
00:45 I said you have to come on the program.
00:48 Today we are talking about rebellion and I'm looking at
00:51 you and thinking you couldn't possibly know anything about
00:55 rebellion, look at you.
00:56 Oh no, I know a lot about that subject, yes I do.
01:01 Isn't it funny? So talk about that.
01:02 Well you know I was born in Jamaica West Indies.
01:06 I had the wonderful privilege of coming here to the
01:09 United States when I was 12, but I was always a very
01:13 well studied student in Sabbath school.
01:16 Loved to study my Sabbath school lesson and know
01:19 how to present at how to answer the questions
01:22 when church time came.
01:25 My teachers would always say you're going to marry
01:29 a preacher someday and I didn't like that.
01:33 Because I'm thinking how adorable is that, you're like
01:36 no it was not. - oh no.
01:39 So that is something you said, I don't want to marry
01:41 a preacher. -. - no I don't want to marry a preacher
01:43 because I saw that as being very restrictive.
01:46 I saw that as if my if I marry a preacher I won't be
01:49 able to do this and I won't be able to do that and so
01:53 I never wanted to marry a preacher.
01:55 The more that my teacher said it the more rebellious
01:59 I became, so I listened to your introduction and I
02:02 thought wow that was me and it started when I was young.
02:06 To be very rebellious.
02:08 What is interesting to me is that the Bible talks about
02:11 fighting against the schemes of the devil.
02:14 Like the devil sets up schemes in your life and it
02:17 sounds like for you the scheme was set really early.
02:20 Let's just put this kind of aversion here and have
02:23 everybody talk about it.
02:25 Hear everybody say you're some day. - some day you're going to
02:29 be a preacher's wife and so I grew up praying actually
02:32 I felt that perhaps it could be true so I started to pray
02:36 and said Lord please help me that I will never marry
02:39 a preacher. So when I did get married, I married when
02:42 I was 21 years old he was not a preacher.
02:46 My husband had just returned from the war in Vietnam
02:49 and he proposed and later we got married.
02:52 He says you know I've been a medic in the service so
02:55 I think I'm going to college and do pre-med.
02:58 So he went into the premed program in college
03:02 and a year later, - I just have to say for you it must have
03:06 been incredible, you're going to marry a Doctor and you
03:09 are really bright so that must have felt perfect.
03:12 A year later he changed his curriculum and said Honey
03:15 I have something to tell you. I said what?
03:18 He said I'm changing to theology.
03:21 And you're like no don't even do it.
03:25 But I never told him through the years of courting and
03:29 dating I never told him that I didn't like preachers or,
03:33 I liked preachers but I just didn't want to marry one.
03:37 So he never knew that, so at the time he told me he was
03:41 going to be a theology major and he wanted to be
03:45 a preacher my heart sunk.
03:48 Did you feel that rebel waking up? - yes.
03:52 Did you feel that rebel? That rebellion sense of - I didn't
03:57 even identify it as rebellion, I really didn't but at the time
04:01 I made decision at that time that what ever a pastors
04:06 wife was supposed to do, whatever a theology student's
04:10 wife was expected to do, I was going to do the opposite.
04:14 But I didn't want to call it rebellion. - yes.
04:17 I thought this was normal because God, You have
04:20 disappointed me, You know that I didn't want to
04:23 marry a Pastor, - yeah.
04:25 I have prayed to You, what are You doing? Did You fall
04:30 asleep up there? To me I really love the fact that when
04:34 that rebellion sets in, it sets in. I will not do it.
04:38 I love what you're saying, I'm going to do the opposite,
04:41 not only am I going to do it, I'm going to do the opposite.
04:46 That seed is set and all of a sudden the devil, I believe
04:50 the devil himself loves that because he knows I have your
04:55 heart. - it was a silent rebellion.
04:58 My husband is now deceased but we were married for 23
05:02 years and for 17 of those 23 years he was a Pastor.
05:06 I was a very dutiful pastors wife and I use the word
05:10 dutiful because I did do the things that were expected
05:13 from his congregants, I did do the right things as far as
05:17 the church was concerned, but that silent rebellion
05:21 was always inside of me.
05:24 I love to type I can do wonderful church bulletins, and
05:29 a lot of things like letter writing and things like that.
05:33 My husband knew that, but every time we went to a new
05:38 church I would say to him, honey please do not ask me
05:42 to type the bulletins for your church. I will not do it.
05:46 But I always ended up doing it because he always asked me
05:50 to do it so I was dutiful and I responded to that, but the
05:53 rebellion was still there.
05:55 So Marcia one of the things that I want to ask you,
05:58 if you could share with us, is that I know for someone
06:02 who is locked in rebellion one of things I noticed as
06:05 we counsel as we work with people from all walks of life,
06:10 is their joy and their ability to give and receive love
06:13 starts to diminish. Did you feel that through the years?
06:18 Did you feel kind of? - oh no, no I gave love, I gave
06:22 what ever was expected of me, but sometimes I felt it
06:26 was pretentious because in my heart I didn't want to be
06:31 in that arena, I didn't want to do those things.
06:35 I would go to camp meetings and the older woman or the
06:39 pastors wives would say are you going to be here for the
06:43 full 10 days? I would say no I will be working.
06:46 I'm only here for today, this is the Sabbath and I'm here
06:50 for today. Then I get to go home and felt satisfied that
06:53 I was being rebellious but here's something I can choose
06:57 to do, I don't have to be at camp meeting for 10 days.
07:01 And that rebellion continued to build, I could see it was
07:06 building, I never had any psychological help with it
07:10 because it was so silent, so no one knew
07:12 I was going through that.
07:13 It was even a blind spot for you - yes, yes definitely.
07:18 So tell me looking back on it now, what did it look like,
07:22 if you know what I mean that you know you said it looked
07:26 a little bit in the fact that I did it because I knew
07:30 I was supposed to do this, I'm supposed to be loving,
07:34 I'm supposed to be caring, I'm supposed to slow down
07:37 enough to take care of you right now.
07:39 Now looking back on it I sort of regret it,
07:43 that I was rebellious.
07:45 One of the things I didn't do as a pastors wife, I did
07:48 not go with my husband to visit the sick, I did not go with him
07:52 to cheer up a family, I would always say honey you just need
07:56 to ask the deacons to go with you because I'm not going.
07:59 - it's not my job. - it's not my job, yeah and the
08:04 regret was that when my husband was dying, he died a few
08:08 years ago, - he had leukemia? - he had leukemia yes.
08:12 So he died from that but the day before he died at the
08:17 hospital where he was I called the Pastor because we were
08:20 in another town it wasn't our town because he had gone
08:24 there for his surgery.
08:25 I said to the Pastor my husband doesn't appear to have
08:30 a lot of time left would you come?
08:33 The Pastors said you know I'm in a school board meeting but
08:39 I will wrap it up and get their just as soon as I can.
08:42 As I was sitting and waiting for him I was watching
08:46 the elevator and when the elevator door opened his wife
08:50 came out of the elevator.
08:52 I said what are you doing here and she said my husband
08:57 called me and stated that he was needed but he is delayed
09:01 and so I came and she touched my hand and said
09:05 Marcia it's going to be all right.
09:08 Then she hugged my mother-in-law who was waiting in the
09:10 hallway and then she moved very cautiously into my
09:14 husband's room and she stood and prayed with him until
09:19 her husband arrived, the Pastor.
09:21 It was that day that I realized the effectiveness of a
09:26 pastors wife, the efficacy, what it could have been for
09:31 me, the satisfaction that I could have brought to
09:35 families, to other families all those years and
09:39 I didn't and that truly touched my heart.
09:42 Yes, so that would be my only regret now because
09:46 I did everything that a pastors wife seemingly should
09:49 have done, but my heart it wasn't there fully.
09:54 I love you saying that because one of the things that
09:58 we are looking at this season is the fact that
10:01 we are robbed by our stuff - yes a wonderful experience.
10:05 Exactly and I think all of heaven just says please trust
10:09 Me on this and surrender this because the joy you will
10:13 feel standing in your giftings, because it really is your
10:16 giftings. - yes, I'm enjoying that now and I took a
10:21 complete turnaround when God, when I surrender that God.
10:24 So talk about that turnaround.
10:27 Because your husband didn't survive.
10:29 - Right he didn't survive but prior to his illness he
10:33 survived for six months after he was diagnosed God gave
10:36 me a ministry of my own.
10:39 One day He just said, I think He said to Himself,
10:44 I'm going to have to wake her up and stop being rebellious
10:48 and I have to do something.
10:50 Okay let me just say because we can't be fully used
10:55 with our junk. God says I want to pour all of heaven
10:59 into you, however I can't because that rebellion
11:04 and you won't let Me.
11:06 I want to know because this is terrible I want to know
11:09 every detail, I want to know how He got through because
11:13 rebellion is hard to get through, we have a heart of
11:16 stone almost and do not know what but God has to bring
11:20 in, like the Bible says a heart of flesh.
11:22 I'm going to give you a heart of flesh - out of stone.
11:25 So how did that look and don't leave anything out.
11:29 Okay, I may have to leave one or two things out.
11:32 But what happened to me was after many, many years living
11:38 that silent rebellious life I took ill with insomnia.
11:43 I could not sleep naturally for eight months.
11:46 - 8 months? Eight months and I thought I would die.
11:50 Because people don't realize you are sad and crazy
11:54 and tired, I mean you were robbed totally
11:59 when you can't sleep.
12:00 Well of course, I always say the three things that are
12:03 most precious to me are my friendships, my sleep, and my
12:06 ministry, so sleep was a very important thing in my life.
12:10 For that to be taken away from me, it was one of the
12:14 hardest things I had ever been through.
12:16 So I just couldn't sleep, I worked in a high-tech job for
12:20 the federal government and I was required to be alert and
12:25 knowledgeable and I was I never was sleepy day or night.
12:30 I drove 60 miles to work each day.
12:33 So after about seven months I went to a Doctor and he put
12:39 me on some sleeping pills and that was not helpful at all.
12:44 Because you really don't sleep, you may be out for
12:47 a little while but you are not really sleeping that
12:49 satisfying rest.
12:51 You go through stages of sleep. - yes, yes.
12:53 So one day I went to sleep clinic at the hospital and
12:58 they connected me with those things that they put all
13:02 in your head and I slept in the hospital that night.
13:07 The next morning the results were that you slept fine,
13:12 you slept for five hours without any drugs and as
13:18 we monitored you, you were sleeping fine.
13:20 So can I move in?
13:24 So that day they dismissed me from the hospital and as
13:28 I stood outside the hospital Cheri I actually felt the
13:32 organs of my body all in an uproar like they were unhappy.
13:37 I could feel my kidneys, liver, all the parts just
13:41 rumbling inside and I stood and looked up to the sky and
13:45 said my God I'm either going to live or die, but if You
13:50 let me live I will serve You for the rest of my life.
13:54 And I was delivered and I started sleeping after that
13:59 prayer I went home and started sleeping like a baby.
14:05 Is that the sense that all of a sudden I'm giving or
14:09 surrendering the whole rebellion and I will do what
14:13 ever You ask me to do. - what ever You asked me to do.
14:17 I want to say that people talk about willpower, actually
14:22 it is our will and God's power and we always say He will
14:26 give us the power.
14:28 He doesn't give us the power, He is the power and
14:31 you have got to give your will to Him and He will
14:34 in turn fix it for you.
14:36 And that's such a, you know that is such a joy in that
14:40 kind of surrender because I'm not trying to muster up
14:45 it within myself something.
14:47 Am I am saying, God I recognize Your power and I know
14:51 You can do this.
14:53 So I know this answer, but I want to hear your take on it.
14:59 What feelings did you feel when you are able to let that
15:06 rebellion go? - oh what happened is that God changed
15:11 my entire life and I became a new woman that day.
15:16 He started by changing the music I listen to in my car.
15:20 Traveling long distances back and forth to work I was
15:24 listening to classic, I love country and western music
15:27 which was not healthy for me because I love the lyrics.
15:31 Those were not good at all and after that day, that full
15:36 surrender to God those types of music were distasteful
15:40 to me and I began playing hymns in my car.
15:44 Old-time gospel music in my car, because I was brought up
15:48 on old-time gospel back in the islands.
15:51 It was a real connection with God. Isn't it funny that even
15:54 with country music there is a lot of rebellion in country
15:57 and for a lot of us especially with a rebellious nature we are
16:02 drawn towards music that, like I remember my favorite song
16:08 growing up was a song called my life, it's my life,
16:10 you can do whatever you want but this is my life and
16:13 I'll do what I want to do kind of thing.
16:15 So we are drawn to music that really talks on our
16:18 rebellion and you said that God pulled you to music that
16:21 talks about your surrender and His love for you.
16:24 Yes, and I started getting more serious about reading the
16:27 Bible, reading inspirational literature, reading my
16:31 devotional thoughts and God opened up a whole new world
16:34 for me. - what did you find in there?
16:36 Well I found I was getting closer to God and I was
16:40 listening to His voice, He was actually speaking to me.
16:44 Before my husband's illness and his death He had showed
16:48 it to me in a vision so I was so close to God that
16:52 He started now telling me how my life was going to be.
16:55 As He showed me that vision about my husband's death,
16:59 I did not see death I thought it was a wonderful thing
17:02 that was going to happen to our family, but I did not
17:05 know it was his dying.
17:07 But God was so good to me, He prepared me for
17:10 my husband's death and He led me through it and then
17:13 He opened up a Ministry for me.
17:15 What is the ministry? Because you have talked about
17:16 that a couple times.
17:17 Yes, the complete woman/man seminars is what we have been
17:21 doing now for almost 18 years.
17:24 It is the ministry I love and we started doing group
17:28 - but what is it? - oh we call ourselves a
17:32 consulting service and we talk to people around the
17:35 country and the world if we could get to the world, but we
17:40 do on our Internet about self esteem and letting them know
17:44 that there is no self esteem without Christ esteemed.
17:48 He has to be the most important person in your life.
17:51 So tell me why, did you get in the ministry because of
17:55 what you went through with your own journey?
17:59 Oh no, I did not get into ministry but it got into me.
18:03 After my full surrender to God I was on my way to work
18:07 one morning, and this was three weeks after
18:10 I was fully healed from the insomnia.
18:12 The Holy Spirit came to me in my car and said you said
18:15 you would serve God for the rest of your life here
18:19 is what I want you to do.
18:20 The name of the seminar the complete woman, that is
18:24 how we started was impressed in my mind and I grabbed a
18:28 pad of paper I had my car and a pen and I wrote it down.
18:32 On the way to work, when I finally got to my place of
18:36 employment I had the ministry on paper.
18:39 If I say to you what am I going to gain, what are you
18:42 going to teach me, what is going to be different about
18:45 me with what you share with me?
18:47 It's a ministry where we go in and talk with someone who is
18:53 having low self-esteem problems, who's having
18:56 rebellion problems, they usually come out not the same
19:02 person that they were before we came in.
19:05 What God showed me was you cannot use books, you cannot
19:10 use ideas from psychologists. I need you to go to My word
19:14 and show men and women how to develop the inner beauty that
19:18 I want them to exemplify and God took us to
19:21 the Beatitudes, Matthew Chapter 5.
19:24 From the Beatitudes we developed an inner beauty
19:29 program to show men and women how to be different people and
19:33 how to relate to one another, how to develop tolerance levels,
19:38 how to create good interpersonal relationships.
19:40 You will have to come to a seminar
19:43 so can get all the teachings.
19:45 As you talk or think about that I know that in our
19:49 rebellion, in our whether is rebellion or low self-
19:54 esteem or whatever it is that if I am responding to the
19:58 world from all that, I am never going to fully connect
20:01 with the people around me and so it sounds like even in
20:05 your own healing is that as you let that go, is
20:09 I can really developed into the total woman, a woman God
20:12 has created me to be.
20:14 I have to be able to drop my, for one my anger, my bitterness,
20:21 my unforgiveness, my disappointments.
20:25 That is what the Beatitudes talks about, I am able to read
20:28 that God has allowed me to be able to go into His word
20:33 and read the King James version and develop a contemporary
20:38 presentation based on the teachings from the Bible.
20:42 I've been into secular environments and done those
20:45 seminars, at the end someone would say, I know you got that
20:49 from the Bible. You see we going to places where they don't
20:53 want us to talk about the Bible, but they do know that we
20:56 are a Christian organization. - that's cool - yeah.
20:59 It's wonderful what God does.
21:02 So now that you are in ministry it's almost like you have
21:07 come full circle in that not only did you marry a Pastor,
21:12 but now you are a teacher with pastoral gifts more than
21:15 likely. - yeah, because I've been a hospital chaplain
21:19 for seven years and the friends who knew me when I was
21:22 married said I thought you didn't go to hospitals,
21:26 how did you become a chaplain?
21:28 But that is what God has done, completely turned my life
21:31 around to do those things I should have done but now
21:34 I am doing them, I didn't do them when He wanted me to.
21:37 But now that He has taken my rebellious spirit I am
21:40 able to serve Him and serve Him in a way that pleases Him.
21:44 I didn't know you were a chaplain how did that come about
21:49 I was bored in Sabbath school one morning and I said Lord
21:53 I have been listening to these wonderful messages from
21:57 Your word and I'm not sharing it, could You tell me what
22:01 to do, I'm not having a very successful outreach program.
22:05 The Holy Spirit said get up get in your car and I started
22:09 driving around the city of Colorado Springs and I landed
22:12 at the parking lot at one of the hospitals.
22:16 I just went in and I said to the charge nurse I'm here to
22:21 visit patients, are there any patients that have
22:25 no family members, no one visiting them that I could
22:29 go in and pray with?
22:31 The charge nurse said on the top three floors allowed me
22:36 to do it and when I got to the third floor the
22:39 charge nurse said you cannot visit patients in this
22:42 hospital, this is a high profile hospital
22:45 and you need an ID.
22:47 So I pulled out my Colorado Springs drivers license.
22:51 She said no you need an ID from the hospital that
22:55 you are to see my patients.
22:57 I felt very rejected and insulted and when I went home
23:01 the Holy Spirit showed me that it was the best thing she
23:04 could have ever done for me, it protected me and so that
23:08 Monday morning I went into the chaplain's office and
23:11 asked how I could be a volunteer chaplain.
23:13 Through outside training, through training from the
23:17 hospital I became a hospital chaplain and that
23:20 is a marvelous story.
23:22 That is incredible, it is an incredible journey that God
23:24 says I know who you are, I know who you are since
23:27 you were a little girl, I saw you in Sabbath school,
23:30 I saw the rebellion kick in, I saw all that stuff and
23:34 even bringing you to the point where I love the fact
23:37 that the elevator door opened and the pastors wife came
23:41 out and you said, I could have been doing this and
23:45 now you are doing that.
23:47 When you talk about your role in your ministry,
23:51 especially the ministry as a chaplain, talk about
23:55 some of the ways God blesses you in that work?
23:58 I'll tell you I was an on-call chaplain for a while
24:03 and one Sunday morning I woke up I was on call from
24:08 7 a.m. Sunday to 4 p.m. that afternoon.
24:11 My phone rang at 7 a.m. and right then I realized that
24:15 there was something undone either by the shift before me
24:18 or something they couldn't do, or something was undone.
24:22 - right because it was so quick.
24:23 Because that was called at exactly 7 o'clock and
24:25 they said there was a project for you.
24:26 So when she called me she said Marcia, though she said
24:30 chaplain Marcia are you still at home and I said yes.
24:34 She said we need you right away at the hospital.
24:36 I said I will be there in 20 minutes.
24:38 On the way to the hospital I said now Lord I'm not
24:41 equipped for whatever it is I'm going to see but
24:44 I want You to guide me and show me what I can do
24:47 to solve this problem.
24:49 So when I went to the desk I said to the charge nurse
24:53 what is the problem?
24:55 She said that this gentleman's wife has died and
24:59 he will not release her body to the mortuary.
25:03 He was sitting there by his deceased wife just looking at
25:07 her and she said chaplain I don't know what you can do.
25:11 I didn't know either but I went into the room and made
25:16 my introduction I said to the widower,
25:19 what is happening with you today?
25:21 He said chaplain my brother died two weeks ago and
25:26 everyone has told me he is in hell.
25:30 I said how did he die? He said he died from an overdose.
25:35 He was OD and committed suicide and he said I will not let
25:40 my wife go until someone tells me that
25:44 she's not going to hell.
25:46 And sooner than right now, faster than immediately the
25:51 Holy Spirit said tell him that I do not judge the act
25:56 I judge the motive and he will never know whether his
26:01 brother is in heaven or hell unless he plans
26:05 to go to heaven.
26:07 And as the Spirit gave me those words I relayed them to
26:10 him and he then took the sheet and he pulled it over
26:14 his wife's face.
26:16 That's just one example. - that he was comforted by
26:20 the truth. - yes and he said to me chaplain
26:24 why couldn't anyone have told me that before?
26:28 So I know that God is pleased with my work, I know that
26:31 when you surrender and give it all to Him He will
26:34 change your life around.
26:38 We're going to open up the discussion to include those in
26:43 the café because I know that you have a friend that has
26:47 known you for a long time, Greta.
26:49 I know that you guys have known each other for a long
26:52 time and that you met while she was doing ministry and
26:55 I would like first of all for you to tell us a little
26:59 about yourself and then how did you guys meet and what
27:02 was that relationship about?
27:03 Hi Cheri my name is Greta Hamilton and I have known Marcia
27:07 for 11 years, we have known each other for quite a long
27:12 time. I retired from the military 20 years ago and that
27:17 is where I met Marcia in a less part of my retirement,
27:22 getting close to my retirement.
27:24 It's funny because you say you retired from the military,
27:26 I would guess you were a model not military.
27:29 That is funny. - no I was in the military for 20 years.
27:33 It was the last part of my career that I met Marcia, and I
27:36 think that was probably one of the lowest points
27:38 professionally and personally in my life and the way we met
27:42 I believe God orchestrates everything because I have been
27:46 running from God for so long.
27:48 I had really been in rebellion from Him because He really
27:51 wanted to bring me in and I had been raised as a
27:54 Christian all my life but like my mother said, I was
27:57 straddling the fence and she said you have to decide if
28:01 you're going to serve man or God.
28:03 The Lord broke me and He orchestrated my surrender to the
28:08 point - can I say that when you talk about in rebellion,
28:11 what did your rebellion look like because we have talked
28:15 about rebellion this whole program?
28:16 My rebellion in specifics really is not fully serving God.
28:22 Not being in a unhealthy relationships that I knew God
28:27 didn't want me to be in, that weren't uplifting Him and
28:32 definitely was dragging me down.
28:34 So what the Lord did was He caused a separation.
28:38 He denied me a promotion which I thought was probably
28:41 the most devastating thing in my life, but it turned out
28:44 to be probably the most positive thing.
28:47 Because even those negative things He allows to bring
28:51 you closer - to wake you up - oh He woke me up, I was
28:55 devastated, I was so devastated.
28:56 A friend was going to a retreat and I remember her telling
29:02 me in order to get over this you have to seek God.
29:06 You have to keep seeking Him.
29:07 So I beg to go with her to this retreat and we went.
29:11 I happened to notice that Marcia was there, I didn't
29:14 realize she was the speaker.
29:15 I'm a very shy person and I saw her sitting there and
29:22 something said go talk to her, go talk to her.
29:26 My first hesitancy was that I didn't want to go talk to
29:29 her, but she was sitting there so inviting and I went.
29:33 I sat and I talked with her, I was talking to her about
29:36 myself and about how God was dealing with me and how
29:39 I was feeling like I know He wants me to do something
29:43 but I don't want to do it.
29:45 I fought God, I fought God is to be in into any kind
29:49 of ministry but she listened more so than anything else.
29:52 It's self, you have got to move self.
29:56 As I listened to that and those around her because I was
30:00 not a Seventh-day Adventist when I met her, and she never
30:03 came out and said I was a Seventh-day Adventist but the
30:07 way she lived her life, when she talked about that she
30:09 was in rebellion I would have never have seen that.
30:12 I would never have saw it because she was a godly woman.
30:16 She never pushed anything at me, but I watched the way
30:19 she lived her life and I started going with her to church.
30:23 It was such a silent evangelism that she had that it
30:29 drew me to the faith.
30:31 I love that whole thing and I love the fact that what
30:35 you're saying is that you didn't see the rebellion in
30:39 her at all so God had brought you to a point to where
30:42 people around you, they are saying rebellion are you
30:46 kidding me, she is a godly woman.
30:48 But there is something else that Greta said that
30:50 I would like you to address if you could Marcia.
30:53 That's where she talked about the self, that little
30:56 self that pops up and really wants our way, and wants
30:59 what we want, and we want it now and all that stuff.
31:02 Part of giving up the rebellion is to deal with self.
31:07 What it is, is that we think what life is about us.
31:10 It is not all about us. - excuse me can I write that
31:16 down? Life is the journey, the path that God has put
31:20 you on for this journey that He wants you to fulfill.
31:24 He is the major part of that journey.
31:29 He wants you to do what He would like for you to do.
31:33 He knows what your desires are, because what is really
31:37 interesting to me is what I found out is that there is
31:41 a place in Matthew, the message Bible says in Matthew 7
31:44 that when you fully see God you fully see yourself.
31:48 That behind our full vision of God is actually who
31:51 He knows we are and all the giftings that we have.
31:54 I think that we run thinking we know what we are running
31:57 to and God says oh Hon, you're running the wrong way.
32:01 Yes, and we really don't see clearly what God has for us
32:05 but the Scripture says in Matthew 6:33, "seek ye first
32:09 "the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these
32:13 "things shall be added unto you."
32:15 The question comes what things?
32:17 You will never know what things until you seek Him first.
32:20 That's amazing - that is what I encourage men and women
32:23 to do. - that is amazing.
32:26 I want to say thank you so much for being on the program.
32:29 I had a blast and I love watching how God works with
32:33 people and I love how He works with you in your rebellion.
32:36 Yes it was a pleasure and I'm glad I was able to come.
32:39 Thank you for everything.
32:41 Okay I hope to see you again, we are going to go ahead
32:44 and take a break and come back for the close so do not
32:47 go anywhere, stay with this we will be right back!