Participants: Cheri Peters, Ed McClure
Series Code: CLR
Program Code: CLR000005
00:10 Welcome to Celebrating Life In Recovery
00:11 I'm Cheri your host.
00:13 What is going on today worker and decide if just say no
00:15 is the ticket.
00:16 I believe if you get this your recovery from whatever, drugs,
00:20 alcohol, porn addictions, well any kind of sexual addictions,
00:23 eating disorders, cutting self-mutilation and the
00:26 cleaner addictions, and I mean cleaner addictions
00:29 the ones we accept.
00:30 Workaholism, perfectionism, religious addictions will be
00:33 easier and you will be blessed.
00:36 You have to stay with us come and join us.
01:07 Abstinence, stopping addictive behavior or what ever
01:10 the hurt, hang-up our habits are that keeps you locked up.
01:14 With whatever, alcohol, food, addiction, shoplifting,
01:18 sexual addictions, porn addictions, online addictions,
01:21 spending too much, workaholism, injury, cutting, burning.
01:25 Let's look at some of the nicer ones, religious addictions,
01:28 gossip, depression, anger, critical spirit, perfectionism.
01:33 Did I say perfectionist, I don't know if anybody has
01:36 that one but I have seen it out there, controlling,
01:39 lying, cheating, abstinence is just the half,
01:43 one half of the first step.
01:46 Don't you hate that? I hate that!
01:50 When I stopped using heroin, I was a heroin addict for
01:54 10 years, from 13 to 23 years old.
01:56 When I stop using heroin I thought you know what,
01:58 everything is going to turn around, everything
02:02 is going to be good.
02:03 I didn't even think when I stopped everything else would
02:08 float nicely to the surface.
02:11 You know when the water kind of settles and
02:14 everything can float up.
02:16 I had no idea that I would have to work with character
02:20 issues and the fact that as an addict I had learned
02:24 all kinds of things so I had to look at all the things
02:27 I've learned as an addict.
02:28 Then I had to look all the things I learned prior to
02:31 becoming an addict that predisposed me to step into
02:33 that life, dysfunctional childhood,
02:35 stopped being loved and all that.
02:38 I thought no way, no way I'm just stopping the addiction
02:45 is one half of the first step.
02:48 Don't you hate that? I thought when I stopped heroin
02:51 I would be fine. Everything would be perfect.
02:55 People told me that, I'm heroin addict and you just need
02:58 to stop doing drugs.
02:59 I stopped doing drugs and everything started coming
03:03 to the surface. I had junk in every single pocket.
03:07 If people say you have skeletons in your closet I thought
03:11 I need to bring these guys out and teach them to dance.
03:13 Because we are in trouble and I am thinking okay I have
03:17 character stuff that is huge.
03:20 I'm manipulative and I lie and I have been on the streets
03:22 forever and I don't know how to behave.
03:24 The first time somebody invited me to dinner, I didn't
03:28 know how to eat with someone and my palms sweat.
03:30 I had no idea about those kind of things.
03:33 The drugs were nothing compared to the things I had to
03:36 learn in my life, and I just hated that.
03:40 I absolutely hate it that is when we stopped looking at
03:44 drug addiction and all the behavioral things that come
03:47 with drugs addiction I started looking at my childhood
03:49 stuff, my parents were addicts.
03:51 The language I learned in my home, emotional spiritual
03:55 language I learned at home was tweaked.
03:57 It was just tweaked, so to decide you were in trouble
04:01 and have to stop the behavior that is killing you is
04:04 important but it is not everything.
04:06 I heard someone say once it was like buying a ticket to
04:09 a theater, but it's not the movie.
04:12 If you know what I mean, I need the ticket, I need to stop,
04:16 but it is not the rest of the thing, the rest of the deal
04:19 is going to take time.
04:21 I remember when God showed me I didn't trust anyone,
04:24 no one and how it hit me as I fell in love to an incredible
04:30 guy, I'm a heroin addict and homeless for 10 years and
04:33 my family are addicts, everybody's addicts.
04:36 My husband was a Boy Scout until he was 18 years old.
04:40 I thought so you were a geek then?
04:43 You are homeless and an addict what is wrong with you?
04:47 His dad was an ambassador for the United States and his
04:50 mom is a violinist with the Madison Symphony,
04:52 an incredible family, right?
04:55 So we fall in love and God gifted me with this man,
04:58 I mean just gifted me.
04:59 He loves me, adores me and I have never been loved and
05:03 nurtured by anyone as much as him in my whole life.
05:06 I mean it is just amazing and one day after 10 years
05:09 of marriage, he looked at me and he was tearing up.
05:12 I thought what Hon? He said you know what Cheri, one
05:16 day you're going to let me love you.
05:18 I thought Hon you're still in my house and that has to
05:23 account for something, and to me I had no idea what he
05:27 was saying was that I had so many trust issues and emotional
05:30 damage that I really never let him close
05:33 enough to love me.
05:34 I don't know the difference because he's the closest
05:37 person ever and he is thinking that there is a wall there.
05:41 It is still there or that have to listen to my husband,
05:45 at first I wanted to say that was not true.
05:48 I let you love me, when I was on the street I moved every
05:51 three months, never did anyone get close to me.
05:53 I did not let them in my life, I never let anyone touch me
05:56 as far as that kind of emotional thing.
05:58 I want to spend the rest of my life with you so I tried
06:02 to convince him it was not true.
06:04 I do let him in, so now I have to convince God.
06:08 God, You know that I love him and You know I've let him
06:14 in, then I hear God through the Holy Spirit Cheri,
06:17 you never let Me in. Oh shut up, not true.
06:22 I did not mean that disrespect- ful to God but He
06:24 knows how I talk, and I said it was not true.
06:27 I let You in, He said not even in your prayers.
06:30 Not even when you are on your knees pleading with Me on
06:34 an issue that means everything to you to I get into that
06:37 place, you don't trust anybody.
06:40 I thought no way, no way and He says, you know what?
06:47 That is the core issue. Wait, I thought the core issue
06:52 was my heroine addiction?
06:53 I thought it was all that kind of stuff.
06:56 He said you don't trust anybody, you have never allowed
06:59 anyone to love you.
07:01 I'm thinking God, wait, and I will get back to that.
07:11 I could taste recovery, I could taste happiness and
07:14 right living forever in thousands of different ways,
07:17 look at all kinds of places and faces or
07:19 I could allow God to lead.
07:21 Our theme text is Isaiah 57:18 from the New Living
07:26 Standard, I want to let people know what version,
07:28 is God is saying, "I have seen what they do
07:31 "but I will heal them anyway" Amen. And I will comfort them
07:36 and comfort those who mourn and I think that is an amazing
07:41 thing, every time I even think of that text I think of
07:45 God's mercy, that He knows all that about me.
07:48 He knows how damaged I am emotionally to the very core
07:51 of who I am and He says I'm going to heal you anyway.
07:53 I'm going to stay with you until you let Me in.
07:57 I'll hang out with you in prayers, and if you think
08:00 It's close that's okay, but I will wait until you
08:03 actually feel what close is like.
08:05 Because when you let Me in, closer than what you think
08:09 it will actually bring healing into your life.
08:11 God's mercy towards us, God is saying that He knows all
08:14 our garbage, even our hidden junk and He will heal us
08:18 anyway Jeremiah 29:13, "the whole heart must be yielded
08:23 "to God or a change cannot happen. "
08:25 I don't have it within myself to get well.
08:27 The Bible says we are dead in trespasses, dead in sins,
08:30 the whole head is sick, I know that, I know that.
08:33 The whole heart is sick, we have no soundness in it.
08:37 We are held captive by our junk, whether it is child abuse
08:41 family dysfunction, molest, eating, violence, rebellion or
08:46 whatever we are taken captive by Satan.
08:48 God desires to heal us and set us free and that requires
08:51 an entire transformation, a renewing of our whole heart.
08:55 We must surrender all to God.
08:56 The battle against self is the greatest battle we will
09:00 ever fight, it's the me that has been developed by
09:03 all the junk, all the rebellion, all the hurt, all the
09:06 past stuff it's fighting for the right to be in control,
09:09 for it's very life, even if it means your death.
09:12 I learned so well at 2- 3 years old that no one is safe,
09:17 no one can be trusted.
09:18 I had to fight that belief every day and allow God to
09:21 teach me truth.
09:34 When we come back I would like you to meet Ed McClure
09:37 and share part of his journey. He is going to tell us
09:41 what his take on God is, what his take on trust is.
09:44 Stay tuned!
09:52 We want to introduce you to a beautiful book
09:54 Called 'Steps To Christ'.
09:56 Each program in this series is based on a different
09:58 chapter showing you how to become a Christian and
10:01 gain victory over your addictions.
10:03 'Steps To Christ' is our gift to you free of charge.
10:06 Just call us at:
10:33 Welcome back, this is my favorite part of the show
10:35 when we get to actually interview someone and find out
10:37 how God has led you.
10:39 What kind of journey have you been on and what was your
10:42 surrender like and how is your healing in that?
10:45 Ed McClure and you're from Texas and have a ministry
10:48 there and you have really explored some amazing things.
10:52 So I'm going to let you say little bit about your
10:54 ministry and then we will find out a little bit
10:56 about where you come from.
10:57 Well the ministry is Zoe 8, Zoe and the numeral 8.
11:01 The ministry is to, the purpose of the ministry is to
11:04 provide information, provide hope number one.
11:08 Provide hope to people who have experienced the kind of
11:10 things, anything frankly, but who have had challenges
11:13 and difficulties in their life.
11:14 We provide hope and technical information that's real hard
11:18 true facts that enable you to change your life,
11:20 mind, body and spirit.
11:22 Number three is support and relationship.
11:25 That our threefold purpose.
11:26 I just love the way you say that because hope isn't
11:28 going to do it, we have to actually, what do I do now
11:31 I am hopeful but what is the first step?
11:34 The first step I think is hope, you have to have hope
11:36 and you have to believe and then you will begin
11:39 to change whatever behavior or whatever issue that
11:41 you are dealing with.
11:43 Then you need a lot of knowledge to do that is what
11:45 I found out in my case.
11:46 So we are all about researching and providing knowledge
11:49 and information to people to help them make the changes.
11:51 Then the relationship support is equally essential
11:54 because you can't change, I heard you talking earlier in
11:57 the show today about you just can't change something and
12:01 think it is all over, it is just the beginning.
12:03 It's not just that you change that one thing.
12:05 So you know what I know more about you then obviously
12:09 the people here do because we have talked before.
12:14 You weren't always as little as you are now.
12:16 No, I at one time was much more substantial than I am now.
12:21 I'm still pretty big guy but I bring this sweater
12:24 along a lot of times to put it in perspective for people
12:26 because size can be relevant.
12:28 This use to be my daily wear and I used to stuff myself
12:31 into this. - close to 500 pounds!
12:33 500 pounds and really miserable, and the weight was
12:38 less of my problems it seems, because I had severe depression,
12:43 Anxiety for years, heart arrhythmia, high blood pressure,
12:47 oozing, gnarled, psoriasis that nobody could contend with.
12:52 Even all that is just a symptom of toxins and poisons
12:56 trying to get out of your body. - absolutely!
12:58 Outward manifestations of inward conditions.
13:00 Medications, I was on chronic medications, 7 different
13:05 chronic medications to quote 'you never get off'.
13:08 You never stopped taking them, they're with you forever.
13:11 In one year I dropped right at 200 pounds, it really
13:15 took 15 months to get off all the medications and I have
13:18 stayed off the medications and it has been amazing.
13:21 - I mean you are half the man you use to be.
13:24 - well maybe two thirds, no 3/5, 60% of the man I used to be.
13:30 But I still like myself, I love myself now.
13:34 - so I know those conditions, that just doesn't happen
13:38 overnight and so for those who have the same struggle,
13:42 whether it be weight or whatever that has led them into
13:45 the same kind of bondages where did that start for you?
13:49 Just to say one thing here so it stays relevant to as
13:52 many people, we have learned in amazing truth which is
13:56 thin people, and thick or fat people, or obese, or
13:59 whatever word you want to use,
14:00 have a very similar life patterns.
14:02 We worked now with a lot of thin people, but our
14:05 circumstances, anything less than what God would desire,
14:09 or what we would desire for our children and that is how
14:13 I personalize it for people.
14:14 If God is our Father in heaven and we have children here
14:17 on earth that we can relate to what He desires for us,
14:19 we desire for our children, so any health condition or
14:22 emotional condition or any condition that you are in
14:25 is less than the abundant life that God, which is Zoe,
14:30 a Greek word is something that we really want to deal with
14:34 and those things begin generally early in life.
14:37 - you know when I said that it made sense to me because
14:40 I have all the emotional damage that was on the
14:44 inside, and yours was more on the outside.
14:46 So somebody could look at yours, but I had the same stuff.
14:50 I think obesity is very tough, and as I get to know people
14:53 with extreme thinness that is tough too because everybody
14:57 can see it, you are wearing your emotions on the outside.
15:00 I want to make the point that I think those conditions
15:04 are physical and there are spiritual and emotional things
15:08 going on that I think personally drive the physical
15:11 state we are in.
15:12 Okay let's talk about where you came from and then get to
15:15 how that unfolded for you.
15:16 Because I know God showed your so many things in His love
15:20 and it changed everything.
15:22 Yes He did, the process I went through that year I was
15:25 healing, if you will, I was healing outwardly and physically
15:29 but what was driving down with the healing of my emotions
15:32 and the spiritual healing.
15:34 As I healed spiritually I was able to grow, we can't grow
15:38 when we are broke, you know.
15:39 We have to be broken to begin to heal and get better.
15:43 God through that year, I have shared this with you
15:47 another time, that I literally would wake up at four,
15:50 I didn't work I took a long time off of work and was
15:53 slow to go back to work, and workaholism is
15:56 my more positive addiction.
15:57 I would get up at four in the morning - you know
16:02 I know I didn't physically hear this, but all over
16:05 the world I heard them say that is not a positive
16:09 addiction, I just heard that.
16:11 Nothing that is out of balance is positive so I stand
16:18 corrected and apologize.
16:22 - women and children! - women and children.
16:25 God took me back through my life and the
16:28 process that I had to go through to get well.
16:30 I was to literally go back and relive and it was amazing
16:33 as if I was in a twilight sleep and I would lay there and
16:37 a prayerful or meditative state and would wake up
16:40 almost every morning at four or five in the morning for
16:43 several hours lie in bed and in a very slow procession
16:46 go back through my life and see the things that happened
16:49 to me. Equally important the things I had done
16:52 and inflicted upon others.
16:53 I could smell and feel and taste the times and places,
16:57 but with an understanding in all most as if God was
17:00 standing beside me saying do you see this.
17:02 See how this affected you?
17:04 Do you see how you affected this person?
17:07 Do you see how you got where you are today?
17:09 Then we were able, as God allowed me to do that and go
17:12 through that process, I was able to put those things
17:14 to bed and gain knowledge and understanding.
17:16 We parish for lack of knowledge God says, with that
17:21 knowledge and understanding of how I got where
17:23 I got in my life and the effect it had not only on me
17:26 but on those that have chosen to love me in this life
17:30 and be connected to me.
17:31 They were equally affected and it amazed me, it not only
17:34 enable and that was all part of the process so the pounds
17:37 are coming off, psoriasis and skin is clearing up.
17:40 You know one thing I am stuck at is where did you start?
17:45 Your 500 pounds did you just one day decide I am going
17:49 to turn over, did someone say, you know what buddy?
17:54 That had been said a few times and I think a self
17:58 realization that time had grown very, very short for me.
18:02 The physical problems and the emotional depression and
18:06 despair I really felt, whether it was the Holy Spirit or
18:10 what, I knew, I didn't need a doctor to tell me.
18:13 - you were going to survive?
18:14 I wasn't going to survive and I felt life circumstances
18:17 from my family, my wife, my children were such in some of
18:20 the businesses we were in it would have been catastrophic.
18:24 Really it sounds a little mellow dramatic, there is no good
18:28 news, no good side of the saga of Ed as Ed was.
18:31 I really felt what a legacy to leave, to deprive my wife
18:37 of a normal life by getting so out of control.
18:41 My children to have a normal father, so not only was the
18:44 reality of life with me bad that I really felt I died at
18:48 that point economically in every other way the legacy
18:52 would have been just disastrous, horrendous.
18:54 And you are actually thinking of putting a will together.
18:56 A will yeah, we had a will of sorts but the problem
19:00 wasn't in the will the problem was in all the loans and
19:03 debts, we owned hotels and just the things we were involved in
19:06 the economic cycle of 911.
19:07 A lot of things were going on in our businesses, things
19:11 that needed to be cleaned up, not just my physical
19:14 condition, there was a lot that had to happen.
19:16 I definitely reached a point, I think this is essential,
19:20 so many people I think were looking for that point were
19:23 I had been trying to turn over to God for a long time.
19:26 I had great people including my family members and
19:29 pastors in what ever pray for me.
19:32 I had been a believer and passionate for the Lord for
19:36 a long, long time, so what does it?
19:39 There is really a level, I think it's like peeling an
19:42 onion in a way in reverse.
19:44 To get to the point where you truly surrender and
19:49 you truly let God become God of every single
19:52 aspect of your life.
19:54 What you eat, what you think, what you do with your time,
19:56 how you prioritize, and I work with people today and
19:59 they have given up 70%. They've changed 30% and
20:04 I used to be one of those people.
20:06 I could get on a treadmill and walk, I could go on any diet
20:08 plan. - I bought the ticket to the movies.
20:11 Yeah I heard say that earlier. - that's not the movie.
20:14 Yeah that's not the movie, the movie is life.
20:17 It's our spiritual being, it's everything.
20:19 - you know what is amazing to me and I know that God has
20:22 showed you that, is that when you give the fact that
20:24 He can pour everything into you. - He can.
20:27 You can submit it all and let it all go so whatever it
20:31 Took when I reached that point, I was ready to do it and
20:35 I had a moment, there is these God moments.
20:39 I think God can only display Himself and the majesty,
20:44 the omnipotence of Himself when there is this utter despair
20:48 when only God can save you.
20:50 You have to get so low, you are beyond it, someone like me
20:52 who thinks he's kind of smart.
20:54 - you are smart, incredibly successful.
20:57 In many ways yes, outwardly you could say that, but when
21:01 I had to reach a point where no matter how much money or effort
21:05 or time, or hired experts, and Ed was going down.
21:08 There was no savings and that is a God moment.
21:12 Wait, wait, wait because His moment of getting it.
21:16 A finally saying this is the, everything must change.
21:20 You were kneeling in a doctor's office on the floor?
21:23 Right, actually just before that I made the decision
21:27 to walk away effectively, I had to have an outward act
21:31 of that, I had to get myself into my car and put myself into
21:35 a facility on the East Coast with a major university
21:37 for one month program.
21:39 I was a guy that worked and never took any time off.
21:41 - so that was huge for you!
21:42 Yes, so I like to say when I walked off my front steps
21:45 and got into my car, my wife and two kids were saying
21:48 goodbye, I had loaded up for four to six weeks and that
21:50 was the biggest moment of my life because for once
21:54 I wasn't trying to manage it within myself saying
21:57 I'm walking away from myself.
21:58 I didn't know what I was coming back or what I would
22:00 find in within 36 hours I'm on the floor at Dr. Colbert's
22:05 office in Orlando, Florida, a per chance Segway on my
22:09 way to this institution and we are on the linoleum
22:13 floor on our knees praying and giving every bit of my life.
22:17 He just cut to the quick too via my childhood in my
22:19 emotional state, he diagnosed.
22:22 Didn't say anything about your weight?
22:23 Weight was incidental to him.
22:25 He said you'll melt, you will melt.
22:26 If you can take care of the spiritual problem of me,
22:30 he characterized it as a root of rejection.
22:33 The divorce when I was five years old, my father
22:36 who was violent, he was an alcoholic and I didn't hear
22:39 from him until I was 17.
22:40 I think that was rejection number one and a numerous
22:44 other rejections and other things.
22:46 When you say rejection number one, with his alcoholism
22:50 and all that type of violence from one to five, and this
22:53 child was not safe I'm sure, or felt safe.
22:56 No I think, and I don't want to make it all about me,
23:00 but we have my story and what I say when I am
23:02 doing seminars, consulting with people, everybody has
23:05 a story, the only relevance of my story to you is that
23:08 we each have one that defines how we got what we are.
23:11 What is amazing about your story is just picturing this
23:15 Dr. saying to you, it really isn't about the physical
23:18 stuff right now, you have so much hurt inside.
23:23 And things you have put in separate compartments.
23:27 Yes, he literally said to me at one point when he put his
23:29 hand on my shoulder and said you know how close
23:33 you are to death, it went through me like a hot knife
23:36 through soft butter.
23:38 I knew that was true and looked at him and
23:41 I said I do know.
23:42 He said to me you know that you can go at any minute.
23:46 He also looked at me and said this rejection it started
23:50 here in your childhood and he said rejection takes root.
23:54 Take this for whatever you want to get out of it,
23:56 it takes root in the intestines, when your intestines
23:58 don't work data starts controlling your body and the
24:00 fact that the spiritual root, the rejection which leads to
24:05 bitterness and all sorts of things begins to take over
24:08 your emotions and in the thing you know you're rolling
24:11 into depression and everything is coming apart.
24:13 We have to go to the beginning of the root which is God,
24:16 and take this to God and get delivered of that
24:20 of the spiritual issue.
24:21 So what he said to me - don't you love that, I love that.
24:24 Ask me if I love that, I'm smiling and there was nothing to
24:27 smile about in my life, in my world.
24:29 But at that time when he said that did you get it?
24:33 Oh I got it, I knew, I came to believe that the
24:37 truth has a resignation level and I'm sure there is some
24:39 scientific way when you prove that when you hear the truth,
24:41 which is the Holy Spirit, it cuts through everything
24:44 so in his office I knew and
24:47 I get goose bumps right now, I knew my life was forever
24:49 changed, it was over and I had come to this reckoning
24:53 moment, what on the earth am I doing on January 29, 2002
24:56 with a guy named Dr. Colbert and his incredible wife,
24:58 Mary walked in and they began to pray.
25:00 The nurses began to pray and we were all praying and
25:04 I am just crying babbling all over, I'm all wet and
25:08 they spent 5 hours with me the first day.
25:11 This is what we all need, we need to be important enough
25:16 and loved enough by strangers by really Christians.
25:20 People who are serving Christ, it is the deal and I left
25:25 that office and to me it sounds crazy, it was over then
25:30 because I had surrendered, the Holy Spirit had entered
25:34 in taking control. - you knew what the issue is?
25:37 I barely could speak or think for two days.
25:40 I could not articulate over the phone to my wife about
25:45 my experience and it is all sort of downhill from there.
25:48 We crashed into the mountain and then it became a journey
25:52 of healing and acquiring knowledge.
25:55 My family becoming part of this.
25:58 Did you still get the treatment center? - oh yeah!
26:00 What happened there? - We could go all day about that
26:02 one, we want to be gentle.
26:04 One of the leading educational institutions in America, is
26:08 over there, the temple if you would go to.
26:12 If money was no object you go to this place and they
26:15 taught me many things, many of the things we use
26:17 in our program I learned there these tremendous strategies,
26:20 tremendous truths, but boy the whole body, mind, and spirit
26:23 connection and all that and I went.
26:25 Dr. Colbert encouraged me to go, my wife encouraged me to go
26:28 and stay there, learn behavior modification, learn things.
26:33 I was so physically sick that when they did the induction
26:36 I was only allowed to exercise in the chair with a rubber
26:40 band, or in a pool.
26:41 I couldn't walk from here 20 feet without crippling pain.
26:45 It is hard to explain to people the physical condition.
26:49 You could look at me and say he looks like
26:51 he's out of shape.
26:52 I'm in such ferocious shape, I work out, I mean I go and
26:56 lift weights to prove to myself that I am really a man,
27:00 a person. - you know what I want to say to you when
27:03 you say that? Don't judge anybody on their journey.
27:06 I was so blessed by even the first part of your journey.
27:11 You getting it and the fact God is so gentle with us.
27:15 Being able to come in and say has nothing to do with... mine
27:19 it had nothing to do with the heroin in the fact that
27:22 I never learned to trust or love anybody.
27:25 You are rejection as a little boy and all those things
27:27 and God says, now let Me love you into health.
27:30 His love healed me and has enabled me to love and you
27:38 can't give what you don't have.
27:39 You must receive it whether it's forgiveness or love
27:42 which are the two things I focus on. we don't go
27:44 around forgiving people until you've forgiven yourself,
27:47 forgiving God for the position as I learned in my walk
27:50 that one of the things that is common, I believe, we
27:54 develop an anger and a separation of God, and it may be
27:58 in your subconscious. - as you're eating!
28:02 Why is this happening to me?
28:03 Why do these donuts make me fatter?
28:04 I don't get it, what's wrong with your plan?
28:07 So it begins there. - isn't it amazing to you that God
28:12 says I love you enough go ahead and blame me until you
28:16 actually see that it wasn't Me.
28:18 My desire for you is to be well and happy and laughing
28:21 out loud. - He's is my Father.
28:24 I came to know my dad really well and He blesses me
28:30 mightily and I still have issues in life but it is
28:37 such a different game, I'm not hiding.
28:39 Fear is gone and fear is replaced by love in my life.
28:43 I am far from perfect and will probably remain so until
28:47 I graduate to the next life.
28:48 When you said far from perfect, that opens up something
28:51 for me because I can ask your wife.
28:53 So Elisa, I want to ask you a couple things, one of the
28:57 things I want to ask you is what did you think when
29:01 he called you and said that he had met Don and what had
29:06 happened? What did you think? Did you think he was
29:09 crazy you better get to that clinic?
29:11 I wasn't surprised, everybody was so concerned about him
29:16 and I knew some of the things he needed to do but when
29:20 you just don't listen or aren't able to listen you don't
29:24 want to hear it and it is not discussed very often
29:27 actually it's pretty ignored.
29:29 It was a white elephant in the room and nobody's talking
29:32 about it. - you're not talking about him? - no!
29:33 Now I know it's not a pun. It could be.
29:38 But you know it becomes uncomfortable as a family to
29:44 talk and everybody is talking to me.
29:46 Why don't you do something, I said I can't do anything,
29:50 there is nothing I can do.
29:52 We have done everything we can do so he came to the point
29:55 where he had to do something himself.
29:57 When he called me and said and talked about Dr. Colbert,
30:00 I had never met him either but I wasn't surprised.
30:03 Because there has been volumes of prayer going into this.
30:08 It wasn't an accident that appointment had just happened
30:12 to open up. - no!
30:13 - Dr. Colbert is a very busy man, very famous.
30:16 That was divine, I mean the hand of God was on that
30:19 appointment, a friend of a friend, a casual thing.
30:22 Pastor John Haggy in San Antonio, Texas who's son
30:25 happened to work for me just bing, bang, bong you're driving
30:29 to the East Coast so just stop by Don's and will get you in.
30:31 Now I just have to say to people, and Elisa you know
30:35 more than anybody else right now is that when you actually
30:39 surrender and put your hand up, when you start telling God
30:43 you know God what ever, He opens doors that will wow you.
30:47 You have to step out with that faith.
30:49 And that is what he did, he gotten in his car that day
30:52 because he had tried to do this a couple times.
30:56 But as he said 9-11 happened and then it was Christmas,
31:00 then the New Year and then he finally went.
31:03 We didn't think he was going to go, mostly just the huh
31:05 he'll get to it one of these days.
31:07 But for him to just get in that car and go, it was that
31:11 first step as we say to initiate something to happen in
31:15 your life, you just can't sit back and wait for it
31:17 to happen, go after it, go get it.
31:21 That was a turning point and he was ready to come home
31:24 after seeing Dr. Colbert and we are all saying no,
31:28 you have already done this and you never take time off,
31:32 go take the time off and spend that time even if you
31:35 don't learn anything in that place at least you're in
31:38 a safe place for a four-week period of time.
31:41 Take advantage of it!
31:45 In that place that taught me much I developed some
31:49 relationships that live on to this day, but more than
31:52 anything, and it is why really went there.
31:55 I knew that I was really done myself and it was over.
31:58 So in my prayer talk with God I was acknowledging that
32:01 I am done, I would look in the mirror and not even
32:04 recognize who was there.
32:06 Well know this is when I was really sick, you see this
32:11 person I can even connect with who and what I am, I primarily
32:17 went there to get away because I knew I had to isolate
32:20 with God and say this could not have been Your plan.
32:23 So I am way out of control, so the purpose of going there,
32:27 and the benefit in the end, the biggest benefit of
32:30 isolation, it was just me and God, no business, no phones,
32:33 I did cheat a little.
32:34 - I was going to say workaholic you would have to have
32:38 a phone somewhere. I would call out and they would call
32:40 in and say you are breaking the rules you are an addict
32:43 and you will never get well, because their prognosis for
32:46 me was not very good.
32:47 I was cheating a little here and there but I had a lot of
32:51 time with God, day and night mostly 24 hours a day.
32:54 I was with Him and I prayed and read the Bible.
32:57 I had my experience at Don's on the way, you see God gave
33:01 me this massive dose of truth and deliverance really before
33:06 I got there so that four weeks was incredibly fruitful.
33:10 Incredibly fruitful. - I am so blessed that makes me
33:14 say God if you are right here I'd kiss You on the face.
33:17 And I'd kiss on the face, right now if there are any
33:20 questions, if anybody has a question right now for Ed?
33:24 Connie! Yes I actually do have a question for you but
33:27 before I ask the question I have to give you a little
33:29 background about my family history.
33:31 I was raised in a small family, just my parents my
33:35 sister and I in Wisconsin.
33:37 When you walked into our home it look like a normal home.
33:39 You go into the kitchen and the refrigerator was fully
33:42 stocked as well as the cupboards in the kitchen.
33:44 But if you went downstairs there is a full refrigerator
33:47 and freezer stocked with food as well as a bunch of
33:51 shelving for canned goods.
33:53 That was the first hint that it might be really important
33:56 in our house, so the next thing you notice if you have
34:01 dinner with us that my parents were incredibly praising
34:06 us continually for the more we ate.
34:08 Now it wasn't just that they were praising us for eating
34:12 everything on our plate, and once you finished it you did
34:15 a good job, they did do that but in addition to that if
34:19 you ate an additional plate, two plates or more, you got
34:24 even more praise and it became almost a contest between my
34:29 sister and I, how much can we eat?
34:31 How much praise can we get today and we so wanted to
34:34 please our parents and there was so much positive
34:38 affirmation that we learned to stuff ourselves.
34:42 So then as they became adults we brought that tendency
34:46 to overeat and stuff ourselves and that feeling of being
34:50 overstuffed became normal for us.
34:53 So I guess one question I have for you is first of all
34:57 how prevalent is that tendency for parents to praise
35:03 their children so greatly when they over eat really and
35:08 also if you have any tips for me, and my sister as well,
35:14 for how we could overcome this tendency to over eat
35:17 because it is such a natural thing for us to do and
35:21 we can't seem to break out of it, either of us.
35:24 Well thank you that was a great question and I think it
35:27 is relevant to so many people.
35:29 I think first as the parents, now before I was a parent
35:33 I was a good critic of parents, but having been one
35:37 I have to reassess my position on parenting.
35:42 Parents are people too and a couple things come to mind.
35:45 I have already mentioned the scripture of my people perish
35:49 for lack of knowledge.
35:50 I found as I became a father, it took me at least
35:53 30 years I would rate myself, about 20 years excuse me
35:56 before I became a pretty good father.
35:58 I like myself as a father today.
35:59 We come so ill-equipped to be parents.
36:01 So many of us in so much to know, we are talking about
36:05 diet and nutrition, the brightest medical minds in
36:08 America don't understand diet and nutrition so how can
36:11 we expect parents to know?
36:13 We need to forgive the parents first of all for just
36:16 being human like the rest of us.
36:17 But indeed you are touching on some things I did learn
36:20 at that great institution on the east coast which is a
36:23 behavior modification, where does behavior
36:25 learned come from.
36:27 As children we are taught through the reward system of
36:31 what is good and what is bad because not only an act of
36:35 consciousness but it becomes a subconscious behavior.
36:38 Which can really undo you, I can tell you right now that
36:41 my mother, God bless her, is a nurse.
36:44 She is and RN and as I went back and read it my childhood
36:47 because I had some stuff in my childhood that I blacked
36:49 out, but when I began to reconnect to that childhood
36:52 indeed one I got my first shots and had to go to a doctor
36:56 the reward was a cherry vanilla ice cream cone.
36:58 The reward was food, now food is a good reward because
37:04 it is effective and it's satiating capabilities and it
37:08 can make us feel good, that is a whole complex subject
37:12 that we can go into really deep or just on the surface.
37:15 But I will say this much, there are chemical things
37:19 that go on with certain foods and there are society
37:22 things, some satiating things that are true about food.
37:25 Food is in effect reward system because it will make you
37:28 feel good, it will do it for chemical reasons, it will do it
37:31 for emotional reasons and you probably have had both
37:33 those things happening to you.
37:35 Again not a conscious act which sets you up for problems
37:39 in your life so I do think that we teach in our program
37:43 strongly to have healthy, positive rewards and be careful
37:47 with their children, do not tell them that children
37:50 are starving in Africa there for clean your plate.
37:52 To put a guilt thing to insert the program in your mind to
37:56 react that way because you're a young woman, but you are
38:00 not a child anymore and you are still dealing with those
38:03 programming issues and have to work through those things.
38:06 First of all I think is real dangerous for us to engage
38:11 in those behaviors and I think again that it happened but
38:16 it needs to be dealt with.
38:18 Second, I want to make this point, food is something that
38:22 is the negative, food is a gift from God.
38:26 This is the temple of God and what did He give us to
38:29 put into the temple, water and food.
38:32 The festivals and the celebra- tions in the Old Testament,
38:36 food was an integral component, in Ecclesiastes there's
38:40 three different scriptures that very specifically say
38:44 God wants man and woman to enjoy his food or her food
38:47 and it is meant to be that and we are to do it with
38:50 a merry heart Ecclesiastes 9:7, go enjoy your food
38:53 with a merry heart for now is the time I favor you
38:57 needs to be in balance.
38:59 He also expects us to eat intelligently and with wisdom
39:03 and knowledge of nutrition and diet.
39:06 Way, way, way back pre-fast foods, fragmented foods.
39:10 In our book 'Eat Your Way To a Healthy Life' we talk
39:14 about the four F's, but literally the four F's of food
39:17 are killing Americans and if not the world.
39:20 Fragmented foods, God made whole foods not fragmented foods
39:24 we eat the wrong foods.
39:26 Family foods, is what you are talking about is where we
39:29 learn bad behavior early on innocently from families.
39:32 We eat those fragmented foods because that is what we
39:35 ate growing up or there are things that are part of
39:38 our heritage so much it's just family tradition that
39:41 can be negative, fast food.
39:43 Nothing fast is really all that good, maybe a fast
39:47 prayer occasionally, but a nice long heartfelt prayer
39:51 would yield a far more better reward.
39:54 Fast foods is destructive, God meant us to enjoy our
39:57 food and that doesn't mean we should do it fast.
40:00 We're just from Italy where Lisa's family are Italian
40:03 and her parents took the family to connect with their
40:07 roots, those people eat for hours.
40:08 They eat fresh food, because food additives is our fourth
40:13 F., we put things into our food that isn't good for us.
40:17 Frankly, when we manipulate an engineer the food to
40:20 where it is not really the food God made.
40:22 So those four F's are dangerous and you are touching
40:25 on probably your family and what they were feeding you,
40:27 all those things are important but it is important
40:30 to keep in balance.
40:32 One of the things, I had an opportunity to speak as a
40:35 Guest speaker almost a year to the day after I left that
40:38 institution, invited by the founder.
40:41 Back to the same institution because I had lost 200 pounds
40:44 and this was a new cover boy let's go back here
40:46 and see what's going on.
40:47 Look what we did, are we proud of this kid and they give
40:51 you a jacket if you lose 100 pounds, it's a blazer and
40:54 they reward it to you and it's a big deal and use it to
40:57 energize people so you owe me two jackets and
40:59 I'm coming back to get them.
41:01 We got a windbreaker, and never got the other jacket but
41:04 it's not important because I had an opportunity to speak.
41:07 That was very important to me because my life had changed.
41:11 I had gone from not being able to walk to fit and abundant
41:15 realizing the dreams of my life.
41:18 - and no psoriasis? - no psoriasis, the skin blew them
41:21 the way the most.
41:22 I went to the head and it touches an interesting thing
41:25 what's really big and ugly and you don't even touch
41:29 yourself, you don't want to.
41:31 I was in such pain and my muscles atrophy, I digressed for
41:35 just a moment so when I was there and
41:39 just learning to lift the rubber bands and try to see
41:42 what kind of exercise.
41:44 I went in for a massage because this was a wonderful thing
41:47 about this place, somebody in my size could actually
41:49 go and get a massage and here was
41:51 this women or man would touch you.
41:54 When she first touched me it was almost like lightning
41:57 bolt, oh my gosh I had forgotten it.
41:59 She would spend a whole hour loosening my shoulders
42:03 a little bit because they have become so bound up.
42:07 This woman touched me in my heart and I got to know her
42:10 the month I spent there because I went there three times
42:13 a week to get treatments, therapy is really what it is.
42:16 She began to tell me some of her life and about her
42:19 daughter, she was a single mom.
42:22 Long to short, God put on my heart to visit three people
42:25 to thank them for having ministered to me when I was at
42:28 the lowest point in my life.
42:30 I booked an appointment with her when my wife and
42:33 I was visiting to speak.
42:34 I went in and got on the table and she started touching
42:38 my spine, she said I remember people by their spines and
42:41 by their skin and I feel I know you but
42:44 I don't know your skin.
42:46 She said I've do this for a living for 15 or 18 years and
42:49 have worked with thousands of people and I don't know
42:51 your skin, who are you?
42:53 I reiterated a story where she had told me about her
42:55 daughter and I say did you go to Wilmington Beach?
42:58 Did you go ahead and do that to step out and the weirdest
43:02 thing was Ash Wednesday and she had these
43:04 ashes on her forehead.
43:06 I said I'm Ed McClure and I was here and I have lost
43:09 200 pounds and she said I remember the first time I saw
43:13 you and thought I have to touch him because it's my job.
43:16 Because of the psoriasis, it was so ugly,
43:18 not just the weight.
43:20 She had heavy people all the time but the psoriasis and
43:22 it oozing and I remember looking at your legs and
43:25 remember asking you what is it? Is it contagious?
43:28 I've been fully diagnosed? It's like liquid and yet
43:31 she touched me, not the legs just the shoulders
43:35 and they were safe. Anyway long to short she ended up
43:38 laying on the floor weeping because saying I needed,
43:42 it's what God did, this isn't about wisdom of the
43:45 institution, God transformed my life.
43:47 She kept saying, your skin, how did it come back to life?
43:53 I said it was God and she took it as a witness and testimony
43:56 and so I digressed but when I went back the most important
43:59 thing in brief talk to the whole place, for the teachers to the
44:03 directors and the in-house residents at the time,
44:05 50 to 75 people.
44:07 As I told them there were 10 things, or nine or think it
44:12 was that had led to my success.
44:15 I said the first one and looked at the founder, they
44:18 taught us there to disassociate ourselves from food.
44:22 They said to me specifically in week three, I went and
44:25 said why does the food have to taste so bad, why don't
44:29 you sauté the chicken with a little garlic?
44:32 Frankly all these people here are wealthy and they are
44:35 going to go back home to their apartments in Paris
44:38 were they have come from, and they aren't going to eat
44:41 this way so what are we doing here?
44:42 The number two guy looked at me and said, you are a sick
44:46 man you've been here three weeks and not gotten it.
44:50 You're still hung up about the food, I said no,
44:52 and I hadn't found it Ecclesiastes 9:7 and God had
44:55 not taken me in His own word to give me His perspective of food
45:00 which is that it should taste good.
45:02 He doesn't want to have a lousy festival in His name.
45:04 He said let us have a feast in My name.
45:07 Enjoy it and give all the glory to God, anyway I said
45:12 you taught us to eat three meals a day, so that is like
45:17 a 1056,1095 meals so you have told me to do something
45:21 1095 times that it's essential to my health and then
45:25 you tell me to disassociate from that.
45:27 Instead we did go into the word God and we did find
45:31 encouragement in His word about, I must say we were in the
45:34 restaurant business all our life so food is important to
45:37 us, there are Italian and it's important to them.
45:39 It can be healthy as long as it is to God, as we submit it to
45:43 God, we are eating His way and we are eating His food.
45:47 We are following His teaching, His will for our life
45:50 with the food and it's a great thing.
45:51 Let me just ask you one thing, the disassociation from
45:54 food and the reinforcement that it brings initially
45:58 is just too detached the emotional strength to it.
46:01 I agree, I agree, on an emotional level you are right.
46:03 But you see that's where you have to make it God's food,
46:06 it is not my food, I am not eating to feel good I'm
46:07 eating to feed the temple of God.
46:10 I'm recognizing that it's okay with Him if it tastes good and
46:14 I enjoy it, but I must eat in moderation.
46:16 I must eat it in a balanced way in these things.
46:20 I just want say the last blessings in my speech were the
46:23 two things, anybody can do seven of the things I did, the
46:26 8th thing was my wife so tough luck here's my ninth but the 9th
46:33 one was God and because this institution disassociated from
46:40 God I just had to say to give God and our Lord credit
46:44 for I am here speaking to you today on how you get this
46:48 healthy this fast.
46:49 That has to be a lead, a change for them and it
46:54 kind of shocked them.
46:55 After we were dismissed people wanted to talk to us because we
46:58 had these revolutionary thoughts that food should taste good.
47:02 We were talking about God and immediately the first person
47:06 that cornered us in the lecture room was a Jewish guy.
47:09 He had been there when I was there a year ago and had seen
47:12 me a year before, there were a lot of Jewish people,
47:15 people from all over the world there from all faiths.
47:18 They said well what about festivals, what about the
47:21 holidays and what about this and the different religions,
47:24 the way we eat and we told the story of Elisha's family.
47:27 I'm back to family food where they are Italians but I had
47:30 to change some basic ingredients to whole foods and
47:36 I am not going to get into a food lecture.
47:38 But we went into their family heritage without changing
47:42 what we ate but look at whole natural ingredients
47:45 that were healthy and fed the body.
47:47 A second point, a long answer but with such a question
47:50 that as long as we are submitting food to God just like
47:54 we have to submit everything else.
47:55 We are not to just bless our food oh Lord but to nourish
47:59 of our body you that is important, but mean it.
48:01 How can you take something that you know is unhealthy and
48:06 asked Him to bless that and eat it?
48:08 There is a scripture in 11 Corinthians I think 29 and is
48:12 talking about the Lord supper.
48:15 There is a scripture that says very specifically, and it
48:18 is tied to taking communion, but tell me that these words
48:21 are perhaps aren't true on their own away from communion?
48:25 It says my people eat unworthily and for this reason
48:30 many are sick and parish.
48:32 When I look at that scripture I said what is He saying?
48:36 Because He told us to enjoy our food with a merry heart
48:40 in Ecclesiastes but nowhere with God, our Father or
48:43 what we tell our children to eat something that is
48:46 not good for us.
48:47 You know we have a few minutes left and I was wondering if
48:50 you could, I know there was a lot of things you learned in
48:53 recovery is there anything out you want to share with us?
48:58 I just talked to a lot about food and it is not just what
49:02 you eat but what's eating you and I feel led and impressed
49:07 to emphasize that the unwinding of Ed and the healing of
49:12 Ed and in fact my getting so sick physically really tied
49:15 to emotional issues and spiritual issues and I don't
49:19 want to leave that under spoken.
49:21 Anyone who thinks they can change their life simply by
49:24 changing what the eat or how much they eat or how often
49:28 they eat it probably will find themselves to be one third
49:31 fixed, or one third of away to life and relapsing.
49:34 That is what the diets don't work because diets go, I hate
49:39 that word, but diets go to assume you can change the
49:42 behavior for a short period of time without changing
49:44 any other real circumstances and
49:47 you'll get a different result, wrong.
49:49 Only for a very short season.
49:50 So what is eating you is as important as with our program
49:54 God took me back to the history of my life and I saw the
49:59 people who hurt me and had to forgive them and to heal
50:03 those wounds in me and the people I hurt which is equal.
50:07 Right, and I want to ask you, in a day did He do that?
50:12 No, no! - the way you looked was no I wish.
50:16 I told you I was in my little basement room and would
50:19 lay down there and sleep down there for a while just
50:22 healing and thinking I need to be alone.
50:23 When I came back from six weeks away by the time I got
50:28 back and had went through it I wasn't ready to assimilate.
50:32 I had to stay away from work for the most part.
50:35 I didn't have a life, I was a born again born again.
50:39 I was a baby and I am still a baby in a way but
50:43 I have some wisdom and knowledge to share.
50:46 It took I would say at least eight months of solid, almost
50:51 every day prayerful and submitted to the Lord saying
50:55 this thing, and I will share this.
50:57 My prayer was God make me the man You intended me to be
51:02 in my mother's womb and that is Psalms 139.
51:04 Make me to realize Lord, and I see with my eyes closed
51:07 I can go right back to that place and say look what
51:09 I have done, look at the psoriasis, look at this
51:12 at the emotional damage I did to my family, look at the havoc,
51:15 look at the wreck of this man at age 50 and the tragedy of it.
51:19 But for whatever reason if I give it to You today and
51:23 submit myself and ask You to make me the man
51:26 You plan me to be.
51:27 I will accept that and if that means I'm out of careers
51:29 and I go broke, the worldly way of going broke or whatever
51:33 that means, and He was assuring me daily fear not because
51:37 you will have it all.
51:38 I will restore you in ways of physical restoration and
51:40 the ability to walk on a beach and get you a beach house.
51:43 It's a testament, I drew a place in the institution.
51:46 They said draw a place a dream of where you want to be.
51:49 I drew a place in chillingly three years later I realized
51:52 we had built that place in the subconscious we had did it.
51:56 - Gods that I want to bless you.
51:58 He said He wanted to bless me.
52:00 You have blessed us and I want to say that you have
52:03 blessed us how I am so grateful that you came on and so
52:06 grateful that you did this journey and I know Ed, I know
52:10 that eight months a lot of people will say eight months
52:13 is too long, that eight months daily and I am sure
52:16 you were blessed by God.
52:18 Oh yes, yeah. - amen
52:19 Thank you so much and we'll be right back so stay with us.
52:27 Amazing stories, real people in real situations discussing
52:30 issues that really matter.
52:32 A complete first season of Celebrating Life In Recover is
52:35 now available on DVD and can be ordered by calling 3ABN
52:38 or online at 3ABN.org hosted by Cheri Peters.
52:42 This season follows principles of the book
52:45 'Steps to Christ'.
52:46 See for yourself how God changed the lives of the
52:48 convicted, and the accused and victims of terrible crimes.
52:51 You won't want to miss a moment
52:53 of these powerful interviews.
52:59 You cannot give up some stuff and hold on to other things.
53:02 CS Lewis wrote 'In the Great Divorce',
53:16 I often thought when I read that quote that what is a
53:19 souvenir? A souvenir is a thing that remind you of a
53:22 pass thing and God is saying give up all that stuff.
53:25 I gave up heroine and all the stuff from the streets.
53:29 Some of the manipulation, most of the lying and
53:31 I didn't even see the core issue.
53:33 So what I love about God is His love for us and it's so
53:36 great that it He stayed right with me until I was able
53:39 to surrender all of my issues, all of my junk.
53:43 Like my inability to trust, to love and all of that.
53:47 I really did long to be the normal, in fact not only
53:51 did I long to be normal, I bought every single
53:53 self-help book on the planet.
53:55 I don't know if Ed went through that, but I bought
53:58 everything, I had my shelves full of stuff in one day as
54:02 I am in my basement, going through my issues, letting God
54:06 bring healing into my life, God said I want you to
54:09 give up your books, all the self-help books.
54:11 I'm thinking no way, I can't do it, how am I going to learn
54:15 to be well and overcome my low self-esteem?
54:18 My depression and this and that and He said,
54:21 when I come back you will be perfect, perfect transformed.
54:26 I'm thinking yeah, but are You coming back tomorrow?
54:29 If You're not coming back tomorrow I just want to be
54:33 normal today and He said trust Me.
54:35 It took me a long time, but as soon as I learned to
54:38 surrender to Him, He filled me with His Holy Spirit
54:41 who made me free.
54:43 Love, joy, peace, patience, gentleness, goodness, faith,
54:48 meekness, temperance, self- control, all with things I need
54:52 that I didn't even know how to get.
54:53 He just gave them to me free, to show me how to live as
54:57 I was created to live.
54:59 I didn't even believe that these things really existed.
55:02 But God taught me that they do and I can be healed by
55:05 them, what an amazing thing.
55:08 Remember abstinence is the beginning, one half of the
55:12 first step, in fact if you want a guaranteed relapse,
55:16 do nothing after you stop the drugs or whatever.
55:20 What ever has kept your bondage, after you stop the food
55:23 like Ed was talking about or the anger or rejection
55:27 or porn or bitterness or alcohol or unforgiveness,
55:31 what ever, you will relapse if you don't go further.
55:35 Know that you have the privilege of asking God, the God who
55:39 created all things, the God who is desired is to see you
55:43 healed, to lead you and He will teach you how to live.
55:47 How to be healthy. How to laugh. How to love.
55:50 How to grow in peace.
55:51 We do not recover overnight, we grow in stages.
55:54 You don't have to wait like I did to hear God say to you
55:58 after 21 years of sobriety to be ready to start.
56:01 Start now because the Bible says today if you hear His
56:04 voice don't harden your heart.
56:06 Today please listen and do not turn a deaf ear,
56:09 Hebrews 4:7 says that.
56:11 Ask Him, it's His desire to save you, to free you from
56:14 bondage as we talked about with Ed and all the different
56:18 things that he had to look at.
56:19 All the different places God had to take him.
56:21 All the way back to his childhood.
56:23 I love what he said, God is so gentle and He will be
56:26 gentle with you, He will walk you in your head to
56:30 where you need to go, to where the hurt was, where the
56:33 injustice was, where the hurt you did to somebody
56:36 else and how to forgive and all those things.
56:39 You just have to ask Him, you got to ask Him and have
56:43 Faith that He is God and He knows and He loves you.
56:46 Ed in his testimony talked about God never giving up.
56:50 Never lost hope in him.
56:52 Never walked away from him during those eight months
56:55 in the basement and He will do the same, trust Him.
56:58 Next time on Celebrating Life In Recover we are going
57:01 to talk about faith and acceptance.
57:04 Faith and acceptance is a huge thing.
57:06 We need to have faith that God is God, that He loves us,
57:09 that he's crazy about us and we need to accept all the
57:12 promises and the Bible that are really geared towards us.
57:16 I never had a problem with that, when we talk to people
57:19 and they have addictions and alcoholism and porn
57:23 addictions and eating disorders and all that stuff I never
57:26 have a problem with that and every once in a while I hear
57:29 somebody that it wasn't their addiction, their whole life
57:32 changes because of somebody else's behavior.
57:35 Next week Joyce Swift is going to be on this show and she
57:38 wrote a book' They Are All Dead Aren't They?'
57:40 A young boy came in and killed off everybody in her family
57:43 and devastated not only her, but an entire community.
57:48 She had to pick herself up, find out who she is again.
57:52 Who God is and how she is she going to heal.
57:55 How is she going to step out of that?
57:56 How was she going to have faith and acceptance of
57:58 what God is doing?
57:59 You won't want to miss this one, it is life-changing.
58:04 Until then please remember that God is crazy about you.
58:08 He's crazy about me, He's crazy about Ed, He is crazy
58:13 about all of us and that is so exciting.
58:16 I want you to know that I'm crazy about you too,
58:19 see you next week!